唱歌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan struktur kalimat agar lebih alami dan efektif. Hindari pengulangan kata dan gunakan kalimat yang lebih jelas dan terstruktur. Misalnya, jelaskan alasan menyukai bernyanyi dengan kalimat yang lebih singkat dan padat.

示例: Yes, I like singing because it helps me feel calm and relaxed. Also, as a man, I have a high-pitched voice, which makes me feel unique and special.

建议: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan kejelasan kalimat. Gunakan kalimat yang lebih terstruktur dan hindari kalimat yang membingungkan. Jelaskan pengalaman belajar menyanyi dengan kalimat yang jelas dan singkat.

示例: Yes, I have been learning to sing since I was a child. Although I don't practice regularly now, I still enjoy singing and consider myself quite skilled.

建议: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan gunakan kalimat yang lebih jelas dan alami. Hindari kalimat yang membingungkan seperti 'everyone can hurt my beautiful voice'. Jelaskan alasan ingin bernyanyi untuk orang lain dengan kalimat yang lebih positif dan terstruktur.

示例: I want to sing for everyone because singing helps me express my emotions. Sharing my voice with others also helps me relieve stress and boosts my confidence.

建议: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan struktur kalimat agar lebih jelas dan efektif. Gunakan kata penghubung yang tepat dan hindari pengulangan kata. Jelaskan pendapat dengan kalimat yang lebih teratur dan spesifik.

示例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people. Although some songs express anger, many songs convey joy and happiness, and beautiful melodies can uplift everyone's mood.

× Yeah, singing is one of my favorite hobby because it makes me calmer when I hear heard music and when I sing it.

✓ Yeah, singing is one of my favorite hobbies because it makes me calmer when I hear music and when I sing it.

The word 'hobby' should be plural 'hobbies' because it is preceded by 'one of my favorite', which requires a plural noun. Also, 'heard' is incorrect here and should be removed to maintain correct tense and meaning.

× Yeah, singing is one of my favorite hobby because it makes me calmer when I hear heard music and when I sing it.

✓ Yeah, singing is one of my favorite hobbies because it makes me calmer when I hear music and when I sing it.

The word 'heard' is incorrectly used in past tense here; the correct form is 'hear' to match the present tense context.

× And then I have a special thing that as a man I am a high pitched tone.

✓ And then I have a special thing: as a man, I have a high-pitched tone.

The original sentence is unclear and structurally incorrect. It needs rephrasing for clarity and correct grammar, including adding punctuation and correcting the phrase to 'I have a high-pitched tone'.

× Yes, I have learned how to sing since when I was a kid but now I don't really do practice when I want to sing but overall eventually.

✓ Yes, I have learned how to sing since I was a kid, but now I don't really practice when I want to sing, but overall eventually,

The phrase 'since when I was a kid' is incorrect; 'since I was a kid' is correct. Also, 'do practice' should be 'practice' as a verb without 'do' in this context.

× Yes, I have learned how to sing since when I was a kid but now I don't really do practice when I want to sing but overall eventually. I'm master singer.

✓ Yes, I have learned how to sing since I was a kid, but now I don't really practice when I want to sing. Overall, eventually, I'm a master singer.

The sentence is run-on and lacks proper punctuation. It needs to be split into clearer sentences and include the article 'a' before 'master singer'.

× I want to sing to everyone because singing is one of my way to express my emotion and when I show it to everyone, I feel like my stress is released and everyone can hurt my beautiful voice because I'm so confident about that.

✓ I want to sing for everyone because singing is one of my ways to express my emotions, and when I show it to everyone, I feel like my stress is released and everyone can hear my beautiful voice because I'm so confident about that.

The preposition 'to' should be 'for' when expressing the audience of singing. 'Way' should be plural 'ways' to match 'one of my'. 'Emotion' should be plural 'emotions'. 'Hurt' is incorrect and should be 'hear' to convey the intended meaning.

× Yes I do think singing can bring happiness to people even though sometimes singing is one of the way to express angry but lot of song that express happy happiness.

✓ Yes, I do think singing can bring happiness to people even though sometimes singing is one of the ways to express anger, but a lot of songs express happiness.

'One of the way' should be 'one of the ways' to match plural. 'Angry' should be the noun 'anger'. 'Lot of song' should be 'a lot of songs'. 'Happy happiness' is redundant; 'happiness' alone is sufficient.

× So sing can bring happiness to everyone because the beautiful tone.

✓ So singing can bring happiness to everyone because of the beautiful tone.

The verb 'sing' should be the gerund 'singing' to function as the subject. Also, 'because the beautiful tone' is incomplete; it should be 'because of the beautiful tone' to be grammatically correct.