唱歌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 回答不够自然且表达不清晰，语法错误较多，建议简化句子结构，直接表达观点，并用连词连接句子，使表达更流畅。

示例: No, I don't like singing because although I enjoyed it when I was young and took some lessons, I am not really a fan of it now.

建议: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不完整，建议使用正确时态，完整表达经历，并用连词连接句子。

示例: Yes, I learned how to sing when I was about eight years old in primary school. I even performed in front of my classmates, but unfortunately, they laughed at me.

建议: 表达有些混乱，语法和用词不准确，建议简洁明了地表达想法，并注意主谓一致和词汇选择。

示例: I would like to sing for my parents because they are the only ones who support me. Even though I'm not a good singer, I want to show my talents to them.

建议: 回答结构不清晰，表达不完整，建议使用更准确的词汇，完整表达观点，并用连词连接句子。

示例: It depends on the person. For example, I don't feel relaxed when I sing, but many others find singing a good way to relax and express their talents, so it can be beneficial for them.

× I used to be love it when I'm singing when I was a young boy.

✓ I used to love it when I was singing when I was a young boy.

这里的错误是动词时态使用不当。'used to'后面应该接动词原形，不能用be动词加love。应改为'I used to love'。另外，'I'm singing'应改为过去进行时'singing'，因为描述的是过去的情况。

× Although if I had my thing lessons during my childhood, but still I'm not a fan of saying.

✓ Although I had singing lessons during my childhood, I am still not a fan of singing.

句子结构错误，'Although'和'but'不能同时使用，且'if'在这里不合适。应去掉'if'和'but'，并调整句子结构使其通顺。

× So there is a reason.

✓ So there is a reason for that.

句子不完整，缺少介词短语来说明原因。应加上'for that'使句子完整。

× Yes I do. I've learn how to sing during my childhood.

✓ Yes, I have learned how to sing during my childhood.

'learn'的过去分词形式是'learned'，这里用现在完成时，应该用'have learned'。

× When I was in the primary school, I was like 8 years old and I tried this thing before all the classmates and show my talents.

✓ When I was in primary school, I was about 8 years old and I tried this in front of all my classmates to show my talents.

'in the primary school'应为'in primary school'，'before all the classmates'应为'in front of all my classmates'，'show'应改为不定式'to show'。

× But at last I got a resource that I was laughing at by all my friends or my classmates and.

✓ But in the end, I was laughed at by all my friends and classmates.

句子结构混乱，'got a resource that I was laughing at'不通顺，应改为被动语态表达被嘲笑的意思。

× Well, I would like to sing for my parents because I guess they are the only one who want laugh at me when I'm singing.

✓ Well, I would like to sing for my parents because I guess they are the only ones who want to laugh at me when I'm singing.

'the only one'应为复数'the only ones'，'want laugh'应为'want to laugh'。

× I know I'm not a good singer, but I will try my best to show my talents to them.

✓ I know I'm not a good singer, but I will try my best to show my talents for them.

'show talents to someone'通常用'for'表示为某人展示才华，更自然。

× That depends on the various people becauses for instance like me, I won't feel any kind of relaxing during singing, but twenty others they will.

✓ That depends on different people because, for instance, like me, I don't feel relaxed when singing, but others do.

'the various people'应为'different people'，'becauses'拼写错误，'any kind of relaxing'应改为'feel relaxed'，'twenty others they will'表达不清，改为'others do'。

× They will think that thing is a good way to relax and show their talents to all of the others.

✓ They will think that singing is a good way to relax and show their talents to others.

'that thing'指代不明，应明确为'singing'，'all of the others'冗余，改为'others'更简洁。

× So I guess it might be beneficial for.

✓ So I guess it might be beneficial for them.

句子不完整，缺少宾语，应补充宾语'them'。