巧克力— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不自然的问题，例如“energies would would shrink into my body”表达不清晰。建议简化句子结构，使用更自然的表达方式，并避免重复。

示例: Yes, I like eating chocolate, especially milk chocolate. Whenever I eat it, I feel more energized and motivated.

建议: 时态使用不准确，如“when I was depressed”应为现在时。表达可以更自然，连接词使用不足。建议使用现在时态并增加连接词使表达更流畅。

示例: I usually eat chocolate when I feel depressed because sweet food can make people feel happier. Especially when I have a deadline, my desk is often filled with chocolates.

建议: 回答开头不完整，语法错误较多，如“Kid no”不合适。建议完整回答问题，注意时态一致，句子结构清晰。

示例: No, I didn't eat chocolate very often when I was a child because it was expensive. My mother usually bought it for me about once a month.

建议: 表达不清晰且有语法错误，如“no one in China hardly heard it”是双重否定。建议使用更准确的表达，提供具体原因和例子。

示例: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes good and many companies advertise it. For example, the brand Dove is well known in many countries.

建议: 回答重复之前内容，且存在语法和表达错误。建议避免重复，使用清晰的句子表达喜好和原因。

示例: I like many flavors of chocolate, such as strawberry and milk, but my favorite is milk chocolate because it gives me energy and motivation.

建议: 表达不够自然，短语“there is less words and no meaning about it”不准确。建议使用更自然的表达方式，说明理由并举例。

示例: No, I don't think chocolate is a good gift because it doesn't have much meaning. I prefer to give gifts like flowers or electronic devices instead.

× No matter when I eat it, energies would would shrink into my body that I can be more motivated.

✓ No matter when I eat it, energy would shrink into my body so that I can be more motivated.

这里“energies”应为不可数名词“energy”，且“would would”重复，应去掉一个“would”。“that”用法不当，应改为“so that”表示目的。

× I usually eat it when I was depressed because eating sweet food could let people joyful.

✓ I usually eat it when I am depressed because eating sweet food can make people joyful.

句子时态不一致，描述习惯动作应使用一般现在时，“was”应改为“am”。“could let people joyful”表达不自然，应改为“can make people joyful”。

× Particularly when it comes to deadline, my desk will be filled with it.

✓ Particularly when it comes to deadlines, my desk will be filled with it.

“deadline”应为复数形式“deadlines”，表示多个截止日期。

× Kid no.

✓ No, I didn't eat chocolate very often as a kid.

“Kid no.”表达不完整且不符合语法，应补充完整句子。

× I didn't eat chocolate very frequently when I was a child because the price of it is much high that I can't afford it, so my mother bought it on nearly once a month for me.

✓ I didn't eat chocolate very frequently when I was a child because the price was very high and I couldn't afford it, so my mother bought it nearly once a month for me.

时态应保持一致，描述过去情况应使用过去时，“is”改为“was”，“can't”改为“couldn't”。“on nearly once a month”表达不正确，应改为“nearly once a month”。

× No one in China hardly heard it.

✓ Hardly anyone in China has heard of it.

“No one...hardly”双重否定错误，应改为“Hardly anyone”。“heard it”应改为“heard of it”，表示听说过。

× I love many flavor of chocolate like Madam strawberry and milk but I like the milk chocolate the best no matter when I eat it or energies would strain into my body that I can be more motivated.

✓ I love many flavors of chocolate like Madam Strawberry and milk, but I like milk chocolate the best. No matter when I eat it, energy would flow into my body so that I can be more motivated.

“flavor”应为复数“flavors”。“energies”应为不可数名词“energy”。“strain into my body”用词不当，应改为“flow into my body”。“that”应改为“so that”表示目的。

× I think there is less words and no meaning about it.

✓ I think there are fewer words and no meaning in it.

“words”是可数名词，应使用“fewer”而非“less”。“about it”表达不准确，应改为“in it”。

× So I would choose another things as a gift such as flowers, electronic machines and so on.

✓ So I would choose other things as gifts such as flowers, electronic devices and so on.

“another things”错误，应该用“other things”。“electronic machines”表达不自然，改为“electronic devices”。“as a gift”改为复数“as gifts”更合适。