记忆— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Try to use more natural expressions and correct grammar. Avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure. For example, instead of 'I am a goldish brain person', say 'I have a poor memory'. Also, use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

示例: No, I have a poor memory. For example, I often forget my keys when I leave the house, which is very inconvenient and sometimes frustrating.

建议: Focus on correct verb forms and clearer sentence structure. Avoid filler words like 'uh' and 'umm'. Use linking words to explain consequences logically.

示例: Yes, I once forgot an important exam deadline. As a result, I was unable to complete it, which was very disappointing.

建议: Avoid redundancy by not using both 'as' and 'therefore' together. Use plural form 'deadlines'. Use linking words to connect ideas clearly and avoid filler words.

示例: As a student, I need to remember all my homework deadlines because they are important for improving my skills and overall performance at school.

建议: Use correct sentence structures and avoid filler words. Use linking words to explain your ideas clearly. For example, say 'Making a list plays a crucial role in remembering things' and provide a clear example.

示例: Making a list is very important for remembering things. For example, before travelling, I make a list of items to pack, which helps me feel more relaxed and organised.

× No, I am a goldish brain person, therefore I do not good at memorizing things.

✓ No, I am a goldfish brain person, therefore I am not good at memorizing things.

The phrase 'goldish brain' is incorrect; the correct idiom is 'goldfish brain' to describe poor memory. Also, 'do not good' is grammatically incorrect; it should be 'am not good' because 'good' is an adjective and requires the verb 'to be'. Use 'am not good' to express inability.

× For instance, when I came out of my home, I always forgot my key and I get it's very inconvenient and sometimes makes me feel angry.

✓ For instance, when I come out of my home, I always forget my key and I get that it's very inconvenient and sometimes makes me feel angry.

The sentence mixes past and present tenses incorrectly. 'Came' and 'forgot' are past tense, but 'always' suggests a habitual action, so present tense 'come' and 'forget' are appropriate. Also, 'I get it's' should be 'I get that it's' for clarity.

× Yes, I was forgot a deadline.

✓ Yes, I forgot a deadline.

The phrase 'was forgot' is incorrect because 'forgot' is the simple past tense of 'forget' and does not require 'was'. The correct form is simply 'I forgot'.

× Therefore, uh, after regarding it, I get it's really like umm, bad because I cannot I could not umm finish it.

✓ Therefore, after thinking about it, I realise it's really bad because I could not finish it.

'After regarding it' is incorrect; 'after thinking about it' is more natural. 'I get it's really like umm, bad' is awkward; 'I realise it's really bad' is clearer. Also, 'I cannot I could not' is redundant; 'I could not' fits past context.

× As I'm a student right now, therefore I guess I need to remember all of my homework deadline because it's very important to improve my educational skills and also make my overall performance at school better.

✓ As I'm a student right now, I guess I need to remember all of my homework deadlines because it's very important to improve my educational skills and also to make my overall performance at school better.

Using both 'As' and 'therefore' together is redundant; one conjunction suffices. Also, 'homework deadline' should be plural 'homework deadlines' to match 'all of'. Adding 'to' before 'make' improves parallel structure.

× I guess make a list is a very, umm, crucial role to remember things.

✓ I guess making a list plays a very crucial role in remembering things.

'Make a list is a very crucial role' is incorrect; 'making a list' is the correct gerund form as the subject. Also, 'plays a crucial role in remembering things' is the correct collocation.

× For example, when you make the list before packaging some umm, products that you need to bring to a travel.

✓ For example, when you make the list before packing some products that you need to bring on a trip.

'Packaging' is incorrect here; 'packing' is the correct verb for preparing luggage. Also, 'bring to a travel' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'on a trip'.

× Yeah, uh, it's very important and makes you feel more relax.

✓ Yeah, it's very important and makes you feel more relaxed.

'Relax' is a verb; the adjective 'relaxed' is needed here to describe the feeling. Therefore, 'feel more relaxed' is correct.