零食— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains some grammatical errors, which affects the natural flow. Try to be more concise and clear, directly answering the question with a topic sentence, then add specific supporting details using linking words for coherence. Avoid redundancy and unclear phrases like 'I try to control myself from 80 too much' and 'which made me so'.

示例: I usually eat snacks when I'm feeling stressed, especially towards the end of the term when I have many tasks to handle. For example, I often choose nuts, chips, or candy to help me relax during these busy times.

建议: Your answer addresses the question but has some vocabulary and grammar mistakes, such as 'facts' instead of 'fat' and awkward phrasing like 'make people being fat'. Try to use more precise vocabulary and structure your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by specific reasons and examples, using linking words to improve coherence.

示例: I don't think most snacks like chocolate, candy, or chips are healthy because they contain a lot of fat and sugar, which can lead to weight gain and other health issues. However, snacks like fruits are healthier options and are fine to eat regularly.

建议: Your answer is generally relevant but contains some grammatical errors and awkward expressions, such as 'I was actually a big sweet tooth' and 'which I usually had it after'. Try to use correct expressions and link your ideas smoothly. Also, avoid repeating similar ideas and be more specific with your examples.

示例: Yes, I often ate snacks when I was young because I had a sweet tooth. One of my favourite snacks was milk chocolate, which was creamy and sweet and always lifted my mood. I also enjoyed nuts, bread, and various types of candies as treats.

建议: Your answer repeats previous information and contains grammatical errors like 'always lift my moods' and 'snacks lovers'. The ending is incomplete ('always help me to'). To improve, provide a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, use correct grammar, and complete your thoughts. Use linking words to connect ideas and be specific about why you like these snacks.

示例: I enjoy a variety of snacks, including milk chocolate because it's creamy and sweet, which lifts my mood. Additionally, I like chips, nuts, bread, and different types of lollies because they are tasty and satisfying when I need a quick energy boost.

× I try to control myself from 80 too much

✓ I try to control myself from eating too much

The phrase 'control myself from 80 too much' is incorrect. The correct preposition to use with 'control' in this context is 'from' followed by a gerund (verb + -ing). Also, '80' seems to be a typo or misplaced word and should be removed. The correct phrase is 'control myself from eating too much'. This means to restrain oneself from excessive eating.

× some candy which made me so

✓ some candy which makes me so

The phrase 'which made me so' is incorrect because the tense does not match the context. The student is talking about a habitual action, so the present tense 'makes' is appropriate. Also, 'so' is vague; it would be clearer to specify what 'so' refers to, but as per instruction, only grammar issues are corrected.

× They contain a lot of facts and sugar which can make people being fat or have other problem

✓ They contain a lot of fats and sugar which can make people fat or have other problems

The word 'facts' is a typo and should be 'fats' when referring to food content. Also, 'make people being fat' is incorrect; the verb 'make' should be followed by the base form 'fat' without 'being'. 'Other problem' should be plural 'other problems' to agree with 'other' and the plural sense.

× for some other snack like fruits they're pretty OK

✓ for some other snacks like fruits they're pretty OK

The word 'snack' is singular but refers to multiple items like 'fruits', so it should be plural 'snacks' to agree in number.

× I love a range of different kinds of snacks

✓ I loved a range of different kinds of snacks

The question is about past habits ('Did you often eat snacks when you were young?'), so the verb should be in the past tense 'loved' to match the time frame.

× One of my favorites was that milk chocolate

✓ One of my favorites was milk chocolate

The article 'that' is unnecessary before 'milk chocolate' when referring to a type of chocolate generally. Removing 'that' makes the sentence more natural.

× Also I love a lot of nuts, bread or different type of candies which I usually had it after

✓ Also I loved a lot of nuts, bread or different types of candies which I usually had afterwards

The verb 'love' should be past tense 'loved' to match the past context. 'Different type' should be plural 'different types' to agree with 'candies'. The pronoun 'it' is unnecessary and incorrect here. 'After' should be 'afterwards' for correct adverbial use.

× one of my favorite snacks is the milk chocolate which is creamy, sweet and always lift my moods

✓ one of my favorite snacks is milk chocolate which is creamy, sweet and always lifts my mood

'Milk chocolate' does not need 'the' here. The verb 'lift' should be 'lifts' to agree with singular subject 'milk chocolate'. 'Moods' should be singular 'mood' as the phrase is idiomatic.

× I have a range of other snacks lovers such as some chips, nuts, breads or different type of lollies

✓ I have a range of other snack lovers such as some chips, nuts, bread or different types of lollies

'Snacks lovers' should be 'snack lovers' as 'snack' modifies 'lovers'. 'Breads' is usually uncountable and should be 'bread'. 'Different type' should be plural 'different types' to agree with 'lollies'.

× They are so nice and always help me to

✓ They are so nice and always help me

The phrase 'help me to' is incomplete and incorrect without a following verb. It should be 'help me' or 'help me to [verb]'. Since no verb follows, 'help me' is correct.