写作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 回答中存在语法错误，如“I will journaling”应为“I do journaling”，且表达不够自然。建议简化句子结构，避免冗余，直接表达写作习惯。

示例: Yes, I write a lot. I keep a journal and often write letters to my parents to express my thoughts and feelings.

建议: 回答中语法和表达不够准确，如“where my relatives”应为“with my relatives”。建议使用连贯的句子，避免重复，清晰表达写作内容和原因。

示例: I usually write emails because they are very useful at work and for keeping in touch with my relatives. I am trying to improve my email writing skills.

建议: 回答中表达不清晰，语法错误较多，如“lights of stage”应为“life stages”，“worst thing”应为“words”。建议理清思路，使用准确词汇表达观点。

示例: Yes, I think what I write changes as I go through different stages of life. My feelings and attitudes evolve, so my writing becomes more positive and mature.

建议: 回答中有拼写错误，如“siliguri”应为“calligraphy”，表达重复且不连贯。建议简洁表达偏好并说明原因。

示例: I prefer handwriting because I enjoy the artistic style of calligraphy. It feels more personal and authentic to me.

建议: 回答语句不完整且含糊，语法错误多，表达混乱。建议简洁明了地说明写日记的频率和原因。

示例: I usually write in my diary on weekends when I have free time to relax and reflect on my life.

建议: 回答中表达不清晰，词汇使用不当，如“drop down”应为“write down”，“patch words”应为“patchwork”。建议用更准确的词汇和句子表达记录生活的方法。

示例: I also record my life by creating a scrapbook. I collect pictures from magazines and make a patchwork to reflect my thoughts and experiences.

× I will journaling and also write the letter to my parents because it helped me to record about all the things that I want to say in my heart.

✓ I will journal and also write letters to my parents because it helps me to record all the things that I want to say in my heart.

动词后面不应该加 -ing 形式，'will' 后面应接动词原形。'journaling' 应改为 'journal'。另外，'write the letter' 应改为复数 'write letters'，因为通常写多封信。'helped' 应改为现在时 'helps'，因为表达的是习惯性动作。

× because it helped me to record about all the things that I want to say in my heart.

✓ because it helps me to record all the things that I want to say in my heart.

动词 'record' 后不需要介词 'about'，直接接宾语即可。

× I usually write e-mail and because my e-mail skill is not that good but it is very useful in workplace or sometimes uh, I used it to communicate where my relatives.

✓ I usually write emails because my email skills are not that good but they are very useful in the workplace. Sometimes, I use them to communicate with my relatives.

'e-mail' 应使用复数形式 'emails' 表示多封邮件。'skill' 应用复数 'skills'。'workplace' 前应加定冠词 'the'。'used' 应为现在时 'use'。'where' 应改为介词 'with'。

× Sometimes uh, I used it to communicate where my relatives.

✓ Sometimes, I use it to communicate with my relatives.

句子描述的是习惯性动作，应使用一般现在时 'use'，而非过去时 'used'。

× Sometimes uh, I used it to communicate where my relatives.

✓ Sometimes, I use it to communicate with my relatives.

介词 'where' 用错，应使用 'with' 来表示与某人交流。

× So I will try to hone the skills of writing the e-mail.

✓ So I will try to hone my email writing skills.

'hone the skills of writing the e-mail' 结构不自然，应改为 'hone my email writing skills'。

× I usually write e-mail and because my e-mail skill is not that good but it is very useful in workplace or sometimes uh, I used it to communicate where my relatives.

✓ I usually write emails because my email skills are not that good but they are very useful in the workplace. Sometimes, I use them to communicate with my relatives.

'e-mail' 应用复数 'emails'，'skill' 应用复数 'skills'，'workplace' 前应加定冠词 'the'。

× I will journaling and also write the letter to my parents because it helped me to record about all the things that I want to say in my heart.

✓ I will journal and also write letters to my parents because it helps me to record all the things that I want to say in my heart.

'letter' 应用复数 'letters'，表示多封信。

× because it helped me to record about all the things that I want to say in my heart.

✓ because it helps me to record all the things that I want to say in my heart.

描述习惯性动作时应使用一般现在时 'helps'，而非过去时 'helped'。

× I used it to communicate where my relatives.

✓ I use it to communicate with my relatives.

介词 'where' 用错，应使用 'with' 来表示与某人交流。

× I usually write e-mail and because my e-mail skill is not that good but it is very useful in workplace or sometimes uh, I used it to communicate where my relatives.

✓ I usually write emails because my email skills are not that good but they are very useful in the workplace. Sometimes, I use them to communicate with my relatives.

'e-mail' 应用复数 'emails'，'skill' 应用复数 'skills'，'workplace' 前应加定冠词 'the'。

× Somehow it will change because it depends on when our lights of stage have changed.

✓ Somehow it will change because it depends on when our life stages have changed.

'lights of stage' 词序错误，应为 'life stages'。

× Somehow it will change because it depends on when our lights of stage have changed.

✓ Somehow it will change because it depends on when our life stages have changed.

'lights of stage' 词序错误，应为 'life stages'。

× Somehow it will change because it depends on when our lights of stage have changed.

✓ Somehow it will change because it depends on when our life stages have changed.

'lights of stage' 应为复数 'life stages'，表示人生的不同阶段。

× I think umm, our feeling will also change, our manner towards the world will change.

✓ I think umm, our feelings will also change, our manner towards the world will change.

'feeling' 应用复数 'feelings'，表示多种感受。

× I think umm, our feeling will also change, our manner towards the world will change.

✓ I think umm, our feelings will also change, our manners towards the world will change.

'feeling' 和 'manner' 应用复数 'feelings' 和 'manners'，表示多种感受和态度。

× So the worst thing, the wording that we put down on our writing will also change, May be more optimistic towards life.

✓ So the words that we put down in our writing will also change, maybe becoming more optimistic towards life.

'worst thing' 应为 'words'，'put down on' 应改为 'put down in'，'May be' 应连写为 'maybe'。

× So the worst thing, the wording that we put down on our writing will also change, May be more optimistic towards life.

✓ So the words that we put down in our writing will also change, maybe becoming more optimistic towards life.

'put down on' 应改为 'put down in'，表示写在某物里面。

× I prefer handwriting when I do my writing because umm, I enjoy writing the siliguri styles of words and it gave me a sense of beauty and au artistic and authentic and with the texture of the words.

✓ I prefer handwriting when I write because I enjoy writing in the calligraphy style, and it gives me a sense of beauty, artistry, authenticity, and texture in the words.

'siliguri styles' 拼写错误，应为 'calligraphy style'。'gave' 应为现在时 'gives'。句子结构需调整使表达更清晰。

× I enjoy writing the siliguri styles of words and it gave me a sense of beauty and au artistic and authentic and with the texture of the words.

✓ I enjoy writing in the calligraphy style, and it gives me a sense of beauty, artistry, authenticity, and texture in the words.

'writing the siliguri styles' 应改为 'writing in the calligraphy style'，'au artistic' 拼写错误，应为 'artistic'。

× and it gave me a sense of beauty and au artistic and authentic and with the texture of the words.

✓ and it gives me a sense of beauty, artistry, authenticity, and texture in the words.

描述习惯性感受时应使用一般现在时 'gives'，而非过去时 'gave'。

× So for handwriting I prefer to. I prefer.

✓ So I prefer handwriting.

句子不完整，重复，应简化为 'So I prefer handwriting.'。

× Usually I will uh write a Diaries at weekend is a good time, relaxing time to write down something umm work to write it down worse hap worse than my life and umm diary umm need to take some time.

✓ Usually I write a diary on weekends; it's a good and relaxing time to write down something about my life, and a diary needs some time.

'Diaries' 是复数，前面用 'a' 不合适，应改为单数 'a diary'。'at weekend' 应为 'on weekends'。句子结构需调整使表达更清晰。

× Usually I will uh write a Diaries at weekend is a good time, relaxing time to write down something umm work to write it down worse hap worse than my life and umm diary umm need to take some time.

✓ Usually I write a diary on weekends; it's a good and relaxing time to write down something about my life, and a diary needs some time.

'at weekend' 应改为 'on weekends'，表示在周末。

× Usually I will uh write a Diaries at weekend is a good time, relaxing time to write down something umm work to write it down worse hap worse than my life and umm diary umm need to take some time.

✓ Usually I write a diary on weekends; it's a good and relaxing time to write down something about my life, and a diary needs some time.

'diary' 应用单数，'diaries' 是复数。

× The item method I used it to drop down. What happens in my mind is through I'm putting some artwork like the patch words, I will try to find some pictures from magazine and then I will cut it out and put into a Skechers book and make it as a patchwork to reflex my life.

✓ The item method I use to jot down what happens in my mind is by putting some artwork like patchwork. I try to find some pictures from magazines, then cut them out and put them into a sketchbook to make a patchwork reflecting my life.

'used' 应为现在时 'use'。'drop down' 用词不当，应为 'jot down'。'through I'm putting' 结构错误，应为 'by putting'。'patch words' 应为 'patchwork'。'magazine' 应用复数 'magazines'。'Skechers book' 拼写错误，应为 'sketchbook'。'reflex' 应为 'reflect'。