写作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is generally clear but could be more natural and concise. Avoid redundancy like "while to be honest" and improve sentence structure for clarity. Also, correct preposition usage, e.g., "before bed" instead of "to before bed." Try to limit your answer to 3-4 sentences and use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

示例: I don't write very often, but sometimes before bed, I like to write in my journal. I usually summarise my day to remember the beautiful moments clearly.

建议: Your answer has some unclear parts and minor errors. For example, "write, journal and race" is confusing; perhaps you meant "write journals and essays" or similar. Avoid filler words like "uh" and try to use linking words such as "because" or "so that" to connect your ideas logically. Also, be more specific about what you write and why.

示例: I enjoy writing journals because they reflect my day and help me remember unforgettable moments. I also like sharing these with my family so they can understand my experiences better.

建议: Your answer is somewhat confusing and contains grammatical errors. Avoid filler words like "uh" and improve sentence clarity. Use linking words such as "however" or "for example" to structure your response. Also, clarify your ideas and avoid repeating the same point unnecessarily.

示例: I don't think the things I write usually change. However, if I had the chance, I would change some decisions, like buying an expensive electronic appliance I didn't want. I even wrote about this in my journal.

建议: Your answer is relevant but can be more concise and natural. Avoid repeating "because" twice in one sentence. Use linking words like "since" or "as" to connect ideas. Also, correct minor grammar mistakes such as "an convenient" should be "a convenient."

示例: I prefer typing since I find handwriting tedious and time-consuming. Nowadays, with laptops and text-to-speech tools, typing is a more convenient and faster way to write.

× sometimes when I go to before bed I like to write some journals

✓ sometimes before I go to bed I like to write some journals

The phrase 'go to before bed' is incorrect. The correct prepositional phrase is 'go to bed' or 'before I go to bed'. The preposition 'to' should be followed by 'bed' without 'before' in between. Alternatively, 'before I go to bed' is a correct temporal phrase.

× I like to write, journal and race.

✓ I like to write journals and essays.

The word 'journal' should be plural 'journals' to match the context of writing multiple entries. The word 'race' seems incorrect in this context; likely the intended word is 'essays' or 'pieces'. Using correct plural forms and appropriate nouns is necessary for clarity.

× it reflects my day and helps me to memorize the unforgettable moments.

✓ it reflects my day and helps me remember the unforgettable moments.

The verb 'memorize' is typically used for learning by heart, but 'remember' is more appropriate for recalling experiences. Also, 'helps me to memorize' can be simplified to 'helps me remember'. The preposition 'to' after 'helps me' is optional but often omitted in natural English.

× I bought an expensive electronic appliance that I do not want it to buy.

✓ I bought an expensive electronic appliance that I did not want to buy.

The pronoun 'it' is redundant because 'that' already refers to the appliance. Also, the verb tense should be past tense 'did not want' to match 'bought'. The phrase 'want it to buy' is incorrect; the correct form is 'did not want to buy'.

× I find writing as an tedious activity because I don't want to write everything down.

✓ I find writing a tedious activity because I don't want to write everything down.

The phrase 'find writing as' is incorrect; the verb 'find' is directly followed by the object and complement without 'as'. So, 'find writing a tedious activity' is correct.

× which is an convenient way.

✓ which is a convenient way.

The article 'an' is used before vowel sounds, but 'convenient' starts with a consonant sound 'k', so the correct article is 'a'.