工作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is clear and relevant but could be more natural and concise. Avoid overly formal phrases like "serving as" and try to add a linking phrase to make it smoother.

示例: I work as a clinical lecturer in the pediatric dentistry department at Downdental College.

建议: Good direct answer with personal detail. To improve, use linking words to connect ideas and avoid repetition of "college".

示例: I work at Asdao Dental Hospital, which is part of the same institution I graduated from, and I really enjoy working there.

建议: Your answer is a bit long and has some unclear phrases like "doing patience." Try to be concise, use linking words, and clarify your points with correct vocabulary.

示例: Yes, it is a great place to work because the environment is supportive. Moreover, I get hands-on experience treating patients and enjoy teaching students.

建议: The answer is repetitive and a bit confusing. Try to be more direct and use linking words to connect your ideas clearly.

示例: Yes, I would like my workplace because loving and appreciating it motivates me and helps me improve my skills.

建议: Your answer has grammatical errors and unclear phrases. Use correct verb forms, linking words, and be specific about your plans.

示例: In the future, I plan to work as an associate dentist in a private clinic. Eventually, I want to own my own clinic to gain more experience and serve patients better.

× I work at a pediatric dentistry department at Downdental College where I'm serving as a clinical lecturer.

✓ I work at a pediatric dentistry department at Downdental College where I serve as a clinical lecturer.

The use of 'I'm serving' suggests a temporary or ongoing action, but the intended meaning is a regular role or position. Using the simple present 'I serve' correctly indicates a habitual or permanent role.

× I work at a hospital called Asdao Dental College.

✓ I work in a hospital called Asdao Dental College.

The preposition 'at' is generally used for specific points or places, while 'in' is used for enclosed spaces like hospitals. Therefore, 'in a hospital' is the correct usage here.

× I have a strong mentoring and I really like doing patience on my own so it gives me a sense of uh, hands on experience in dental care as well as I can teach students.

✓ I have strong mentoring and I really like treating patients on my own so it gives me a sense of hands-on experience in dental care as well as allows me to teach students.

'Mentoring' is uncountable here, so 'a strong mentoring' is incorrect; it should be 'strong mentoring'. Also, 'doing patience' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'treating patients'. Additionally, 'hands on' should be hyphenated as 'hands-on'.

× Yes, I would love the place where I would work because I think it's very important to love and to appreciate your workplace as as it gives you the sense of motivation and encouragement and it really helps you in improving in your further work experiences.

✓ Yes, I would love the place where I work because I think it's very important to love and appreciate your workplace as it gives you a sense of motivation and encouragement and really helps you improve in your future work experiences.

The use of 'would' in 'where I would work' is unnecessary and incorrect here; simple present 'where I work' is appropriate. Also, 'improving in your further work experiences' is awkward; 'help you improve in your future work experiences' is clearer and grammatically correct.

× My future work plans includes uh doing a high paying job as a dentist.

✓ My future work plans include doing a high-paying job as a dentist.

'Plans' is plural, so the verb should be 'include' not 'includes'. Also, 'high paying' should be hyphenated as 'high-paying' when used as an adjective.

× Also has an associate dentist at a private clinic.

✓ I also have an associate dentist position at a private clinic.

The sentence lacks a subject and verb. Adding 'I also have' corrects the sentence structure and subject-verb agreement.

× I also plan to own a clinic of my own where I could deal patients and I could have a more experience.

✓ I also plan to own a clinic of my own where I can treat patients and gain more experience.

'Deal patients' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'treat patients'. Also, 'have a more experience' is incorrect; 'gain more experience' is the proper phrase. Using 'can' instead of 'could' fits better for future plans.