工作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is generally clear but could be more natural and grammatically correct. Avoid tense inconsistency and redundancy. For example, instead of "Currently I worked", say "Currently, I work". Also, try to use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

示例: I work as a performance marketing specialist and have been in this field for six years. Currently, I work at a company in the coupons and deals industry, where I focus on optimizing advertising campaign performance to achieve better results.

建议: Your answer has grammatical errors and unclear expressions. Make sure to use correct sentence structure and clarify location clearly. Avoid vague phrases like "next shooting on district" which is confusing.

示例: Our company is located in the Putuo district of China, which is near the Jing'an district.

建议: Your answer covers relevant points but could be more concise and better structured. Avoid redundancy like "I think" twice. Use linking words properly and correct small errors such as "the additionally" which should be "additionally".

示例: Yes, I think it is a good place to work because the salary is satisfying. Additionally, my colleagues are very kind and collaborative, which creates a supportive work environment.

建议: Your answer is somewhat repetitive and contains hesitations. Try to speak more fluently and organize your ideas clearly. Avoid filler words like "uhm" and unclear phrases such as "comfortable with?". Use linking words to connect your points.

示例: Yes, I like the place where I work because the office environment is peaceful and comfortable. Moreover, we have free snacks, coffee, and afternoon tea, and my colleagues are very quiet, which helps me focus.

建议: Your answer is incomplete and contains unclear phrases and hesitations. Try to complete your thoughts fully and avoid repeating the same idea. Also, use correct vocabulary such as "data analysis" instead of "data Analyze this. Anne."

示例: I want to improve my skills in my field, so I plan to pursue a master's degree in a related area, such as marketing or data analysis.

× Currently I worked in your company in coupons and deals industry where I focus on optimizing advertising campaigns performance to drive better results.

✓ Currently I work in your company in the coupons and deals industry where I focus on optimizing advertising campaigns' performance to drive better results.

The sentence uses 'worked' which is past tense, but 'Currently' indicates present tense should be used. Also, 'coupons and deals industry' needs a definite article 'the' to specify the industry. Additionally, 'advertising campaigns performance' needs a possessive form 'campaigns'' to show ownership.

× Well, our company located in Putuo district of China, where is just the next shooting on district.

✓ Well, our company is located in Putuo district of China, which is just the next shooting district.

The sentence is missing the verb 'is' after 'company' to form the present tense. 'Where is just the next shooting on district' is incorrect; 'which is just the next shooting district' is the correct relative clause. Also, 'on district' is incorrect preposition usage; 'district' does not require 'on' here.

× I think a good job should be supportive to your personal life and the additionally, our colleagues are very kind and collaborative, so it's a good place.

✓ I think a good job should be supportive to your personal life and, additionally, our colleagues are very kind and collaborative, so it's a good place.

The phrase 'and the additionally' is incorrect. 'Additionally' is an adverb and should be separated by commas and not preceded by 'the'. The correct form is 'and, additionally,' to connect the ideas properly.

× Yes, I like it because the office environment is quite peaceful and. Uhm, comfortable with? Free snacks and coffee and afternoon tea, and our colleagues are very quiet as well. Uhm. So I kind of like it.

✓ Yes, I like it because the office environment is quite peaceful and comfortable, with free snacks, coffee, and afternoon tea, and our colleagues are very quiet as well. So I kind of like it.

The original sentence is fragmented and contains unnecessary fillers and question marks. 'Comfortable with?' is incorrect; it should be 'comfortable, with' to connect the ideas. Also, the list of snacks and drinks should be separated by commas for clarity.

× Actually I want to improve. I want to improve my skill in the relevant field. So I am going to pursue a masters degree in related field like marketing or data Analyze this. Anne. So I.

✓ Actually, I want to improve my skills in the relevant field. So I am going to pursue a master's degree in a related field like marketing or data analysis.

The sentence is fragmented and contains errors. 'Skill' should be plural 'skills' to match the context. 'Masters degree' should be 'master's degree' with an apostrophe. 'Related field' needs an article 'a'. 'Data Analyze this. Anne.' is incorrect and should be 'data analysis'. The sentence should be combined for clarity and correctness.