Study— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be concise and accurate: start with a clear topic sentence (e.g. “I’m a student.”), correct grammar (article use, word order) and avoid repetition. Add one brief supporting detail about your course using correct phrasing. Use linking words only if needed.

Exemplo: I’m a student at Hong Kong Community College. I’m studying for an Associate Degree in Social Service, which focuses on community work and social welfare.

Sugestão: Give a direct answer then one or two clear reasons. Remove fillers and contradictory words. Use simple linking words (because, although) correctly and be specific about what you like.

Exemplo: I study in Hong Kong. Although it’s a busy city, I enjoy living here because the local community is friendly and there are many cultural activities and support services.

Sugestão: Answer directly and use correct grammar (subject-verb agreement). Provide specific supporting detail and a linking word like “because” or “so”. Avoid vague phrases like “all the things”.

Exemplo: Yes, it’s a good place to study because public transport is reliable and campuses, libraries and shops are close by, which makes daily life and commuting much easier.

Sugestão: Give a clear opinion and one or two specific suggestions. Use correct verb tenses and collocations (e.g. “upgrade facilities”, “study pods to help students concentrate”). Avoid filler words and be concise (max 3–4 sentences).

Exemplo: Yes. I would like the college to upgrade some facilities, for example expanding the library and adding quiet study pods so students can concentrate better.

Sugestão: Start with a clear statement of your plan, avoid hesitation, and use correct sequence words (first, then, after). Be specific about what you hope to study at university and why. Keep to 2–3 sentences.

Exemplo: First I plan to complete and pass the IELTS exam. After that I hope to enroll in a university social work program to continue studying social services and community support.

× I'm currently a student in a Hong Kong Community College and I'm the a pursuing the degree in Associate degree up at the Social Science in Social Service.

✓ I'm currently a student at Hong Kong Community College and I'm pursuing an Associate Degree in Social Sciences (Social Service).

Article errors and word order: 'a Hong Kong Community College' should be 'at Hong Kong Community College' (preposition + proper noun without 'a'). The extra 'the a' is redundant. 'pursuing the degree in Associate degree up at the Social Science in Social Service' is ungrammatical and repetitive; use 'pursuing an Associate Degree in Social Sciences (Social Service)'. Use 'an' before a vowel sound and capitalize the degree name appropriately.

× I'm studying in Hong Kong.

✓ I'm studying in Hong Kong.

This sentence is correct; no change needed. (Included to show no preposition error.)

× It's a beautiful city, uh, even though it's a hustle and bustle city, but I still love it because, uh, the community and also the, uh, social, uh, surroundings, environments are bad, are great.

✓ It's a beautiful city. Although it's busy and bustling, I still love it because the community and the social surroundings are great.

Run-on and redundancy: 'even though' and 'but' should not be used together. 'hustle and bustle city' is incorrect; use 'busy and bustling'. 'surroundings, environments are bad, are great' conflicts and is unclear; choose 'are great'. Remove filler words and split into two sentences for clarity.

× I think it's a good place to study because you know, Hong Kong are really crowded, all the things is stuck in together, so the travel transport were very convenient.

✓ I think it's a good place to study because Hong Kong is really crowded, everything is close together, so transportation is very convenient.

Subject-verb agreement: 'Hong Kong are' should be 'Hong Kong is'. 'all the things is stuck in together' has plural subject with singular verb and awkward phrasing; use 'everything is close together'. 'travel transport were' is plural verb with singular noun; use 'transportation is'.

× All The thing is nearby, so I think it's a good place to stay.

✓ Everything is nearby, so I think it's a good place to stay.

Article and capitalization: 'All The thing' is incorrect; use 'Everything' or 'All the things'. Also 'nearby' fits better with 'everything' and sentence is simplified.

× Yes, I want, I will uh, welcome some changes to the place where I will studies.

✓ Yes, I would welcome some changes to the place where I study.

Tense and verb form: 'I will studies' mixes future auxiliary with incorrect base form; 'study' is correct. 'I will welcome' is awkward in context; 'I would welcome' is more natural for a desire. Remove fillers.

× I think some kind of facility can upgrade, for example the library or some kind of umm, study pods can help students focus badly.

✓ I think some facilities could be upgraded; for example, the library or study pods could help students focus better.

Quantifier and word choice: 'some kind of facility can upgrade' is ungrammatical; use 'some facilities could be upgraded'. 'study pods can help students focus badly' uses 'badly' incorrectly; use 'better'.

× So currently I'm still a bit confused saying umm, but for right now I want to uh, finish my IELTS test and then pass it.

✓ Currently I'm still a bit confused, but right now I want to finish my IELTS and pass it.

Verb tense consistency and redundancy: 'currently' and 'right now' are redundant; keep one. 'finish my IELTS test and then pass it' is fine but can be shortened to 'finish my IELTS and pass it'. Remove fillers.

× After pass the exam I can uh, pursue my dreams in university.

✓ After passing the exam, I can pursue my dreams at university.

After + verb should use -ing form: 'After pass' is incorrect; use 'After passing'. Also use 'at university' or 'in university' depending on dialect; 'at university' sounds natural here.

× Still working on the studies on the programs on social.

✓ I'm still working on my studies in the social programs.

Missing subject and preposition errors: sentence lacks a subject ('I'm'). 'studies on the programs on social' is awkward; use 'studies in the social programs' or 'studies in social service programs'.