Views— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and correct grammar. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Fix pronunciation/word choice (e.g., “skies” → “sky” or “scenes”; “track environment” → “track changes in the environment”). Avoid sentence fragments and unnecessary pauses.

Exemplo: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views as a hobby. For example, I have a large collection of sky and landscape photos in my gallery, and when I look back at them I can clearly see how the weather and seasons have changed over time.

Sugestão: Provide a direct topic sentence and expand with one or two specific reasons, connected with linking words. Avoid fillers and repetition. Correct grammar (e.g., “me personally” → “I personally”; remove stutters). Describe what makes rural views appealing with concrete details.

Exemplo: I personally prefer rural views because they are more peaceful and offer natural subjects. For instance, the small village where my grandparents live has stone houses and rolling fields, which are picturesque and easier to photograph without crowds.

Sugestão: Start with a clear statement and give organized, specific supporting details using linking words. Fix grammar and word choice (e.g., “four season” → “has four distinct seasons”; “is mountainous” → “are mountainous”; avoid “very perfect”). Be concise and avoid fillers like “uh”.

Exemplo: I prefer photographing views in my own country because Iran has diverse landscapes and four distinct seasons. For example, some regions are mountainous with snowy peaks, while others have expansive deserts or lush forests, which gives me a variety of scenes to capture.

× I have a very big collection of skies pictures in my gallery.

✓ I have a very big collection of sky pictures in my gallery.

The plural noun 'skies' is not used correctly with 'pictures' here; the intended modifier is 'sky' as an attributive noun (singular) modifying 'pictures'. Use 'sky pictures' or 'pictures of the sky'. Suggestion: say 'a collection of pictures of the sky' for clarity.

× And it's really fun to track environment through photos when you. See them all after a while.

✓ And it's really fun to track the environment through photos when you see them all after a while.

The sentence is broken by an incorrect period and missing article 'the' before 'environment'. Also 'See' was capitalized incorrectly and separated. Combine into one sentence, add 'the' to specify the environment, and keep 'see' lowercase: 'when you see them all after a while.'

× I think they both have their own beauty but me personally prefer rural areas.

✓ I think they both have their own beauty, but I personally prefer rural areas.

Use the subject pronoun 'I' instead of 'me' as the subject of 'prefer'. Add a comma before 'but' for clarity. 'I personally prefer' is the correct structure.

× There's a small village where my grandparents live and it's quite picturesque and very. Very. Enjoyable to take pictures of.

✓ There's a small village where my grandparents live, and it's quite picturesque and very enjoyable to take pictures of.

The original has unnecessary sentence fragments ('Very. Very.') and punctuation errors. Combine fragments into a single sentence and place adjectives together: 'quite picturesque and very enjoyable to take pictures of.' This corrects fragmentation and improves flow.

× I really feel I don't know.

✓ I really don't know how to describe it.

The original 'I really feel I don't know' is incomplete and awkward. Provide a clear completion such as 'I really don't know how to describe it' to express uncertainty appropriately.

× My country is Iran and it's a very large four season country.

✓ My country is Iran, and it's a very large four-season country.

Use a hyphen in the compound adjective 'four-season' when it modifies a noun. Add a comma after 'Iran' for readability.

× Some areas of it is mountainous and uh, on the other hand, it has great deserts and.

✓ Some areas of it are mountainous, and, on the other hand, it has great deserts,

The subject 'Some areas' is plural, so the verb must be 'are' not 'is'. Add commas to set off the parenthetical 'on the other hand'. The sentence originally ends abruptly; keep parallel structure.

× Very perfect rainforest too and this very climates are very exciting to me and I enjoy taking pictures of it.

✓ it also has beautiful rainforests, and these varied climates are very exciting to me; I enjoy taking pictures of them.

Multiple issues: 'Very perfect rainforest' is nonstandard — use 'beautiful rainforests' or 'perfect rainforests'. 'This very climates' is ungrammatical; use 'these varied climates' to match plural. 'I enjoy taking pictures of it' should match plural 'them'. Rephrase for clarity and correct pronoun agreement.