Chocolate— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Try to make your answer more fluent and coherent by avoiding pauses and incomplete sentences. Start with a clear topic sentence and then explain your reason using linking words like 'because' or 'so'.

Exemplo: Yes, I love eating chocolate because it helps me feel better when I'm sad or lonely. For example, the sugar in chocolate gives me relief from stress, which is why I really enjoy it.

Sugestão: Avoid repeating phrases and incomplete sentences. Use linking words like 'because' and 'however' to connect your ideas clearly. Keep your answer concise and directly related to the question.

Exemplo: I don't eat chocolate very often because it is not good for my health. Eating too much can cause weight gain and other health problems. However, I do enjoy it occasionally when I feel stressed.

Sugestão: Complete your sentences and avoid trailing off. Use clear linking words like 'because' and 'so' to explain your answer. Provide specific details to support your response.

Exemplo: I did not often eat chocolate as a kid because my father was health conscious since he was a wrestler. He sometimes gave us a small piece of chocolate, but not the whole bar, to keep us healthy.

Sugestão: Make your answer more structured by starting with a clear topic sentence. Use linking words like 'for example' and 'because' to explain your points. Avoid filler words like 'uhm' and be specific about the benefits.

Exemplo: Chocolate is popular worldwide because many people enjoy its taste and benefits. For example, in my country, chocolate was not easily available in every city before, but now it is because people have become familiar with its flavour and health benefits.

Sugestão: Avoid incomplete sentences and unclear phrases. Start with a clear topic sentence and use linking words like 'but' and 'so' to connect ideas. Be specific about your favourite flavour and describe why you like it.

Exemplo: When I was a teenager, I used to eat plain chocolate. But now, many kinds of chocolate are available in my city, and I have tried many flavours. My favourite is fruit and nut chocolate because it gives a nice crisp texture while eating.

Sugestão: Make your answer more coherent by using linking words like 'because' and 'however'. Avoid repeating words and clarify your ideas with specific examples.

Exemplo: Yes, chocolate is a great gift because there are many varieties available. However, if the person does not like plain chocolate, we can choose chocolates covered with fruits, which adds variety and makes the gift more special.

× Oh, I love eating chocolate because.

✓ Oh, I love eating chocolate because it makes me feel better.

The original sentence ends abruptly with 'because' without completing the thought, which is a sentence structure error. To correct it, complete the sentence by explaining the reason for loving chocolate.

× If let's say I'm feeling a little bit sad and I'm lonely so.

✓ If, let's say, I'm feeling a little bit sad and lonely,

The sentence is incomplete and improperly structured. The phrase 'If let's say' should be separated by commas, and the sentence should continue to complete the thought. The word 'so' at the end is unnecessary and breaks the sentence structure.

× Sugar, it can give me a relief from my stress, so I really like that.

✓ Sugar can give me relief from my stress, so I really like that.

The phrase 'Sugar, it can' is redundant and incorrect. The pronoun 'it' is unnecessary after 'Sugar'. Also, 'a relief' should be 'relief' as 'relief' is an uncountable noun here.

× Not too often because it's not that good for your health if let's say.

✓ Not too often because it's not that good for your health, if let's say,

The sentence ends abruptly and is incomplete. The phrase 'if let's say' is informal and should be followed by a complete clause to make sense. The sentence needs to be completed or restructured.

× If I'm eating too much, OK, it will increase my weight.

✓ If I eat too much, it will increase my weight.

The phrase 'If I'm eating too much' is awkward here; the simple present tense 'If I eat too much' is more appropriate for general truths. Also, 'OK' is informal and unnecessary in this context.

× It can give me other health related problems.

✓ It can cause other health-related problems.

The phrase 'give me other health related problems' is awkward. The verb 'cause' is more appropriate when talking about health problems. Also, 'health related' should be hyphenated as 'health-related'.

× But occasionally you can have the chocolate whenever you are. Feeling stressed?

✓ But occasionally, you can have chocolate whenever you are feeling stressed.

The sentence is broken incorrectly with a period before 'Feeling stressed?'. It should be one continuous sentence. Also, 'the chocolate' is unnecessary; 'chocolate' without 'the' is better here.

× Not really because my father, he's a wrestler and his a little bit health conscious so he never or maybe sometimes he offered us a chocolate, a piece of it, but not the whole chocolate.

✓ Not really, because my father is a wrestler and he's a little bit health conscious, so he never or maybe sometimes offered us a piece of chocolate, but not the whole chocolate.

The pronoun 'his' is incorrect; it should be 'he's' (he is). Also, 'he offered us a chocolate' is awkward; 'offered us a piece of chocolate' is better. The sentence is long and needs commas for clarity.

× So it was.

✓ So it was like that.

The sentence 'So it was.' is incomplete and unclear. Adding 'like that' completes the thought and makes the sentence meaningful.

× I think it is popular because of its demand.

✓ I think it is popular because of the demand for it.

The phrase 'because of its demand' is slightly awkward. 'The demand for it' is clearer and more natural in English.

× Uhm, if I take an example of my country, the chocolate was not used to with that easily available in every city, but now it is, it is available because people are quite familiar with the taste, people are quite familiar with the demand.

✓ Uhm, if I take an example from my country, chocolate was not easily available in every city before, but now it is available because people are quite familiar with the taste and the demand.

The original sentence is awkward and contains unnecessary words like 'used to with that'. The phrase 'take an example from' is correct. Also, combining similar ideas with 'and' improves sentence flow.

× So and the benefits also, so that's why.

✓ Also, because of the benefits, that's why.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. Rephrasing it to a complete sentence clarifies the meaning.

× When I was. A teenager at the time I used to eat plain chocolate, but as I grew up so every kind of chocolate is now available in Vice City.

✓ When I was a teenager, I used to eat plain chocolate, but as I grew up, every kind of chocolate became available in Vice City.

The sentence is broken incorrectly with a period after 'was'. Also, 'so every kind of chocolate is now available' should be in past tense 'became available' to match the timeline.

× So I have tried a lot of flavors but the most I like is a fruit dinner at is at.

✓ So I have tried a lot of flavors, but the one I like the most is fruit dinner.

The phrase 'the most I like is a fruit dinner at is at' is confusing and grammatically incorrect. It should be 'the one I like the most is fruit dinner' for clarity.

× It gives me a kind of crisp while having it.

✓ It gives me a kind of crisp feeling while having it.

The phrase 'a kind of crisp' is incomplete. Adding 'feeling' clarifies the meaning.

× Yes, it's a great gift as the variety of chocolates are now available so we can give them different different kind of chocolates.

✓ Yes, it's a great gift because a variety of chocolates are now available, so we can give different kinds of chocolates.

The phrase 'as the variety of chocolates are now available' is awkward; 'because a variety of chocolates are now available' is better. Also, 'different different kind' is repetitive and should be 'different kinds'.

× But if the person didn't like it, so we can make it cover with the fruits and also it can give them not just the chocolate but other things also.

✓ But if the person doesn't like it, we can cover it with fruits, and also give them not just chocolate but other things as well.

The pronoun usage is confusing. 'Make it cover with the fruits' is incorrect; it should be 'cover it with fruits'. Also, 'didn't like' should be 'doesn't like' to match the present context. The sentence is restructured for clarity.