Writing— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: 문장이 길고 중복 표현(예: "use it, use the artificial intelligence", "just try hard to not to use AI and you express")이 있어 자연스럽지 않습니다. 명확한 주제문으로 시작하고 supporting detail을 연결어로 정리하세요. 또한 시제와 대명사 오류를 고치고 단어 선택을 더 정확하게 하세요. 예: 주제문→이유→예시 순으로 2~3문장으로 응답하세요.

Exemplo: Yes, I write quite a lot because I am a college student and I often have assignments and exams that require writing. Although many people now use artificial intelligence to help with writing, I try to avoid it and write my own statements because it improves my thinking and language skills.

Sugestão: 발음적 망설임(umm)과 구문 오류("what technology I'm gonna leave allocate")가 있고 표현이 모호합니다. 질문에 직접 답한 뒤 이유를 간결하게 제시하세요. 구어체 약어(gonna) 대신 정중한 표현을 쓰고 구체적인 세부사항(예: 데이터 종류, 기술 예시)을 덧붙이세요.

Exemplo: I prefer writing research proposals because planning a project excites me. For example, I outline which datasets I will use, such as survey results or experimental data, and specify what technologies or tools, like statistical software or machine learning libraries, I will apply.

Sugestão: 문법 오류(예: 'was is', 어색한 관사 사용)와 반복이 보입니다. 간결한 주제문으로 시작하고 이유와 구체적 예시(무엇을 수정하는지)를 연결어로 설명하세요. 문장 수는 2~3문장으로 유지하세요.

Exemplo: Yes, I usually revise my writing because editing is a crucial part of producing clear work. For example, I often rewrite sections to improve the structure, correct mistakes, and clarify my research aims and methods.

Sugestão: 좋은 이유 제시는 있지만 표현의 중복과 문법적 어색함('reduces time for typing')이 있습니다. 하나의 주된 이유를 먼저 말하고, 연결어로 구체적인 장점을 덧붙이세요. 'typing' 관련 표현을 다양하게 사용하세요.

Exemplo: I prefer typing because it makes editing and rearranging text much easier. For instance, using a computer lets me move paragraphs, use spellcheck, and save different drafts, which saves time compared with rewriting by hand.

Sugestão: 응답이 끝나지 않은 듯하며 문법과 어순 오류가 많습니다. 질문에 직접적으로 빈도를 명시(예: never, rarely, once a month)하고 이유를 간단히 덧붙이세요. 불완전한 문장은 피하고 예시를 하나 추가하면 좋습니다.

Exemplo: I never keep a diary regularly. I have tried a few times, but unless it's for a class assignment I usually don't maintain one; instead, I only write short notes when something special happens.

Sugestão: 문법과 어순 오류('the one who take the video when people gathered it's me')와 어색한 표현('visual thing media')가 많습니다. 명확한 주제문을 사용하고, 구체적인 방법(사진, 동영상, 소셜 미디어 등)과 이유를 자연스러운 연결어로 설명하세요. 마지막에 간단한 예시를 넣으세요.

Exemplo: I usually record my life with my smartphone camera by taking photos and videos because I prefer visual memories. For example, I often film gatherings with friends and save short clips on my phone or upload them to a private album so I can relive happy moments later.

× Yes, because I'm a college student, whenever I have to do the assignment, when taking a test, I have to write a lot.

✓ Yes, because I'm a college student; whenever I have assignments or take tests, I have to write a lot.

여러 절이 어색하게 연결되어 있어 문장 구조가 흐트러졌습니다. 'assignments or take tests'처럼 유사한 항목을 병렬 구조로 연결하고 세미콜론 또는 쉼표로 구분하면 명확해집니다. Suggestion: keep parallel structure and use proper punctuation.

× So all those these days, many people use it, use the artificial intelligence to write it.

✓ These days many people use artificial intelligence to write things for them.

중복 표현('all those these days')과 어색한 어순이 문제입니다. 'use artificial intelligence to write things'로 간결하게 표현하세요. Suggestion: remove redundant words and place objects after verbs.

× But for me, I just try hard to not to use AI and you express in my own statement and that helped me a lot.

✓ But for me, I just try hard not to use AI and to express my ideas in my own words, which helps me a lot.

'not to use'의 부정형과 동사 병렬구조가 어색합니다. 또한 시제 일관성을 위해 'helps' 현재형을 사용해야 합니다. Suggestion: use parallel infinitives ('not to use' -> 'not to use AI and to express') and keep verb tense consistent.

× I like to write the documents or the research proposal for me, umm, planning something is kind of a very exciting thing.

✓ I like to write documents or research proposals; planning something is very exciting for me.

불필요한 정관사 'the' 사용과 어색한 표현('is kind of a very exciting thing')이 문제입니다. 복수형 사용이 자연스럽고 간결한 표현으로 바꾸세요. Suggestion: drop 'the' when speaking generally and simplify adjectives.

× So that's why I really like to write the research proposal.

✓ So that's why I really like writing research proposals.

단수 'the research proposal'가 특정하지 않아 일반적 선호를 말할 때 복수형이 더 적절합니다. Suggestion: use plural for general statements about types of work.

× I organize what data I'm gonna use and also what technology I'm gonna leave allocate.

✓ I organize what data I'm going to use and which technologies I'm going to allocate.

구어체 'gonna'를 표준 영어 'going to'로 바꾸고 'leave allocate'라는 잘못된 표현을 바로잡아야 합니다. 'which technologies I'm going to allocate'로 수정했습니다. Suggestion: avoid 'gonna' in formal speech and ensure correct verb phrases.

× I think rewriting process was is one of the very important process in when writing something.

✓ I think the rewriting process is one of the most important parts of writing.

시제 혼합('was is')과 관사 누락, 어색한 표현('process in when')이 문제입니다. 현재 시제로 통일하고 관사를 추가하며 문장을 간결하게 만드세요. Suggestion: use 'the rewriting process is' and 'one of the most important parts'.

× And of course research proposal means the planning, the step.

✓ Of course, a research proposal means planning and outlining the steps.

관사 누락('research proposal' 앞에 a)와 어색한 나열('the planning, the step')이 문제입니다. 자연스러운 명사 나열로 바꾸세요. Suggestion: include 'a' for a type of document and use natural noun phrases.

× So revising something is very important in the proposal and also the document if I have to make more clear I need it.

✓ So revising is very important for a proposal or any document; if I need to make something clearer, I revise it.

대명사와 문장 구조가 혼란스럽고 어색합니다. 'I need it'의 지시 대상이 불명확합니다. 명확한 목적어와 동사로 재구성하세요. Suggestion: state the action explicitly ('I revise it') and use comparative 'clearer'.

× I prefer typing because handwriting, of course it has its appeal.

✓ I prefer typing because handwriting, of course, has its appeal.

주어와 동사의 위치는 괜찮지만 쉼표 사용과 중복 어구를 다듬어야 합니다. 문장 부호만 수정해 자연스럽게 만드세요. Suggestion: place commas correctly around 'of course'.

× But if we have to rewrite in, when I do the handwriting, it's very annoying.

✓ But when I have to rewrite something by hand, it's very annoying.

전치사와 절의 위치가 어색합니다('rewrite in, when I do the handwriting'). 'by hand'로 표현하고 절을 정리하세요. Suggestion: use 'rewrite something by hand'.

× And if I do the typing, I can really revise it very clearly and easily.

✓ If I type, I can revise it much more clearly and easily.

'do the typing'는 어색한 표현입니다. 간단한 현재형 'type'을 사용해 자연스럽게 만드세요. Suggestion: use verb forms without unnecessary 'do'.

× So that's why I really love typing and it also reduces time for typing.

✓ That's why I really love typing; it also saves time.

반복('typing' 두 번)과 어색한 표현('reduces time for typing')이 문제입니다. 간결하게 'saves time'로 표현하세요. Suggestion: avoid repetition and choose natural verbs like 'save'.

× Actually for me I don't keep Diaries at all.

✓ Actually, I don't keep a diary at all.

'Diaries'가 복수형으로 쓰였지만 일반적으로 'keep a diary'라고 표현합니다. 관사와 단수형을 사용하세요. Suggestion: use 'keep a diary' for personal practice.

× I have tried a lot of times to write journals, but if I don't do it as a assignment, I really never did or try to do the to keep Diaries.

✓ I have tried many times to write a journal, but if it's not an assignment, I never manage to keep it up.

관사('a assignment' → 'an assignment'), 복수/단수 혼동, 시제 일관성 문제 및 어색한 어순이 있습니다. 자연스러운 표현으로 바꾸세요. Suggestion: use 'many times', 'a journal', and 'an assignment'; use present perfect + present structure.

× So whenever I just have some events that I want to express, I just.

✓ So whenever I have events I want to record, I do so in other ways.

문장이 미완성되어 있어 동사가 빠졌습니다. 끝맺음을 추가해 완전한 문장으로 만드세요. Suggestion: finish the clause ('I do so' or 'I write about them').

× I usually use the smart phone camera app.

✓ I usually use the smartphone camera app.

'smart phone'을 하나의 단어 'smartphone'으로 쓰는 것이 일반적입니다. 관사 'the'는 특정 앱을 가리키지 않을 때 생략 가능하지만 남겨도 무방합니다. Suggestion: use 'smartphone' as one word.

× Taking the videos and photos is very important to me because I like something that is expressed by the visual thing media.

✓ Taking videos and photos is very important to me because I prefer expressing things visually.

어색한 명사구('the visual thing media')와 관사 사용이 문제입니다. 'expressing things visually'처럼 간결한 부사구로 바꾸세요. Suggestion: use 'expressing things visually'.

× So I usually take the one who take the video when people gathered it's me and it's very happy.

✓ So I usually take videos when people gather; I enjoy capturing those happy moments.

문장 구조가 붕괴되어 의미 전달이 어렵습니다. 누가 카메라를 사용하는지와 감정 표현을 분리하여 명확히 하세요. Suggestion: split into two clear sentences and state subject and action explicitly.