Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Improve grammar, sentence structure and clarity. Start with a clear topic sentence, use correct verb forms, and provide one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Reduce redundancy and avoid run-on phrasing.

Exemplo: I currently work as a pharmacist at the Department of Disease Control. My main responsibilities include developing clinical guidelines for people living with HIV and managing several HIV-related projects. For example, I recently led a project to improve adherence support for patients, which involved training local clinics and monitoring outcomes.

Sugestão: Give a concise, coherent answer with correct word order and fewer hesitations. Begin with a clear statement of location, then add one specific detail about your team's role using linking words.

Exemplo: I work in the public health office of Nonthaburi province, which is not far from Bangkok. My team focuses on monitoring infectious diseases, and we regularly collect and analyze data to detect outbreaks early.

Sugestão: Avoid pronunciation errors and incomplete sentences. Provide a clear reasoned answer with linking words (e.g., because, and) and one specific supporting detail. Keep it under five sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, I think it's a good place to work because it is very convenient and pleasant. For example, there is a MRT station nearby so my commute takes only about 15 minutes, and the area has many trees and green spaces which make the environment relaxing.

Sugestão: Correct word choice and concise phrasing. Start with a direct topic sentence, then use linking words to explain why, giving one concrete example of how the dynamic pace helps you.

Exemplo: Yes, I like the place where I work because the atmosphere is lively and the pace is dynamic. As a result, I stay motivated and often learn new skills quickly; for instance, I recently learned a new data-management tool while working on an outbreak investigation.

Sugestão: Make grammar and vocabulary corrections and present a clear plan. Start with a direct statement of your plan, then give reasons and a specific goal using linking words like because and so. Avoid vague phrases.

Exemplo: I plan to stay in this career for the next ten years because it is stable and the work is interesting. In addition, I hope to specialize as a project manager so that I can take on more responsibility, for example leading large public health initiatives and coordinating multi-site teams.

× Currently I work as pharmacist at Department of Disease Control.

✓ Currently I work as a pharmacist at the Department of Disease Control.

Missing indefinite and definite articles and slight word order issue. Use 'a pharmacist' for the singular job title and 'the Department of Disease Control' as a specific department. Suggestion: include appropriate articles before job titles and institution names.

× My responsibility including developing guidelines which people who living with HIV and managing several project with HIV related to.

✓ My responsibilities include developing guidelines for people living with HIV and managing several projects related to HIV.

Multiple errors: subject-verb agreement ('responsibilities include' not 'responsibility including'), incorrect relative clause and verb form ('living' needs no auxiliary), plural forms ('projects'), and preposition use ('for' and 'related to' -> 'related to HIV' or 'related to HIV'). Suggestion: use plural 'responsibilities', main verb 'include', and correct prepositions and plurals.

× I work in department offices control administrator of public health which located in non totally uh province not not far from Bangkok's is a missile problem I think and my team focus on monitoring infection disease.

✓ I work in the Department of Disease Control office of the provincial public health administration, which is located in Nonthaburi province not far from Bangkok, and my team focuses on monitoring infectious diseases.

Multiple article and naming errors and tense/verb agreement: use definite article 'the' for specific departments, correct proper noun 'Nonthaburi province', fix verb forms ('is located', 'focuses'), and plural 'infectious diseases'. Also remove unclear words. Suggestion: use proper names, include articles, and ensure subject-verb agreement.

× Yes, I think it's a good place to wear because it's very convenient for me like a BTMRT station nearby so many people is only about 15 minutes to travel and also this area has a lot of tree and green space which make.

✓ Yes, I think it's a good place to work because it's very convenient for me: a BRT/MRT station is nearby so it takes me only about 15 minutes to travel, and the area has a lot of trees and green space.

Typo 'wear' should be 'work'. Article and noun number errors: 'a BRT/MRT station', 'trees' plural. Verb structure: 'it takes me only about 15 minutes' not 'many people is'. Suggestion: correct typos, use articles with singular countable nouns, pluralize 'trees', and use clear time expressions.

× Yes, I like the paste in the same where I work because the atmosphere is lively and and the pace is dynamic which keep me motivated and help me learn new things quickly.

✓ Yes, I like the place where I work because the atmosphere is lively and the pace is dynamic, which keeps me motivated and helps me learn new things quickly.

Typo 'paste' -> 'place'. Pronoun/adjective order awkwardness removed. Subject-verb agreement: 'which keeps' and 'helps' to match singular 'pace' or the situation. Suggestion: correct typos and ensure verbs agree with the subject.

× Yes, I plan to stay this career for the next 10 years because it's a stable and I find the world is very interesting.

✓ Yes, I plan to stay in this career for the next 10 years because it is stable and I find the work very interesting.

Preposition missing: 'stay in this career'. Article issue: 'a stable' is incorrect; use 'stable' or 'a stable job'. Word choice: 'work' instead of 'world'. Suggestion: use correct prepositions and choose appropriate nouns.

× More I hope to specialist in project manager so I can take more responsibility on as one.

✓ Moreover, I hope to specialize as a project manager so I can take on more responsibility.

Multiple errors: 'More' should be 'Moreover' or 'Also'; verb form 'specialize' not 'specialist'; preposition and verb usage 'take on responsibility' not 'take ... on as one'. Suggestion: use 'specialize as' or 'become a' and the phrasal verb 'take on' for responsibility.