Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: 回答は内容が豊富で明確ですが、時制の一貫性と自然さを改善してください。具体的には、“I worked”と“I specialize/design”のように過去形と現在形が混在している点を直し、応答は直接的なトピック文（現在の状況）で始め、追加情報はつながりの語（for example, mainly, such as）で整理すると自然です。また文数は3〜4文にまとめ、冗長な語（e.g., “architecture design firm”のような重複）を避けてください。

Exemplo: I work as an architect at a design firm in Tokyo. I mainly focus on large-scale projects such as hotel towers and office complexes. I also sometimes design mixed-use buildings, which combine residential and commercial spaces.

Sugestão: 内容は明確ですが、言い淀み（“I had, I had been”）や冗長な表現を避け、時制と語順を整理してください。回答はまず現在の場所を述べ、次に過去の経験を簡潔に付け加えると良いです。接続詞（but, before that, for seven years）を使って流れを滑らかにしましょう。

Exemplo: I work in Tokyo now. Before that, I lived and worked in Osaka for more than seven years, but I moved to Tokyo for new professional opportunities.

Sugestão: 肯定から始めるのは良いですが、曖昧な表現（“I guess so”、“Umm”）や文法の誤り（“helps me feel relaxed and constant”）を減らし、具体的な理由を論理的に述べてください。つなぎ語（because, which, so）を使い、1〜2の明確な理由を示すと説得力が増します。

Exemplo: Yes, it's a great place to work because Tokyo has many striking buildings and plentiful green spaces. These surroundings help me relax and improve my concentration while I work.

Sugestão: 非常に良い回答で、理由と具体的描写が含まれています。ただし、“work area”の語選びを改善し、語を少し簡潔にするとさらに自然になります。接続詞の使用は適切ですので、文の長さを保ちながら語彙の正確さに注意してください。

Exemplo: Yes, I like it very much because my office has a large window with a panoramic view of the surrounding greenery. Seeing that view from my desk helps me stay calm and focused throughout the day.

Sugestão: とても良い構成で目的と理由が明確です。改善点は“小さな語法”で、例えば“English skill”は“English skills”と複数形にする、また“for example in Scandinavia or Germany”は“in countries such as”で自然にすると良いです。接続語（because, also）を活かして簡潔に述べ続けてください。

Exemplo: I would like to work in European countries, such as in Scandinavia or Germany, to improve my English skills and broaden my design experience. By collaborating with diverse teams, I hope to learn different design approaches and expand my professional network.

× I worked as an architect at an architecture design firm in Tokyo.

✓ I work as an architect at an architectural design firm in Tokyo.

Original uses past tense 'worked' though context asks about current work; change to present 'work' to match the question. 'Architecture design firm' is awkward; use adjective 'architectural' to modify 'design firm.' Use present tense when describing current occupation.

× I specialized in large scale buildings such as hotel towers and office complexes, and sometimes I design mixed-use buildings.

✓ I specialize in large-scale buildings such as hotel towers and office complexes, and sometimes I design mixed-use buildings.

The student mixed past 'specialized' with present 'design.' The question asks about current work, so use present simple 'specialize.' Also use hyphen in 'large-scale.' Maintain consistent tense when describing habitual or current activities.

× I work in Tokyo, but previously I worked in Osaka.

✓ I work in Tokyo, but previously I worked in Osaka.

Sentence is correct: present for current job and past for previous job. No change needed. (Kept as is to show correct tense contrast.)

× I had, I had been there for more than seven years and then I moved to Tokyo.

✓ I had been there for more than seven years, and then I moved to Tokyo.

Double 'I had' is a repetition error. Use the past perfect 'had been' to indicate the duration before the move, then simple past 'moved.' Remove the duplicated phrase and separate clauses with a comma.

× Umm Tokyo has a lot of stunning buildings and great green areas which always helps me feel relaxed and constant.

✓ Umm, Tokyo has a lot of stunning buildings and great green areas, which always help me feel relaxed and calm.

Subject 'areas' is plural, so the relative clause needs plural verb 'help' (subject-verb agreement). 'Constant' is incorrect here; use 'calm' to express a stable relaxed state. Add commas for clarity.

× Umm enhance my concentration of work.

✓ Umm, they enhance my concentration at work.

Original fragment lacks a subject and is not a full sentence. Add subject 'they' referring to buildings/green areas and use the prepositional phrase 'at work.' 'Concentration of work' is unnatural; 'concentration at work' or 'focus at work' is correct.

× Would you like the place where you work?

✓ Do you like the place where you work?

Examiner's question in transcript uses 'Would you like...' but student response should match; the sentence itself is grammatically correct but likely intended to be 'Do you like...'. No student correction needed; included here to show preferred form.

× Yes, I like the place where I work because my office has a large window overlooking the work area, and it's surrounded by lush greenery.

✓ Yes, I like the place where I work because my office has a large window overlooking the work area, and it's surrounded by lush greenery.

Sentence is grammatically correct and appropriate in present tense describing current conditions. No change needed.

× I'm always happy to see the relaxing panoramic view from my desk, which helps me stay calm and focused.

✓ I'm always happy to see the relaxing panoramic view from my desk; it helps me stay calm and focused.

Original sentence is acceptable, but replacing the comma with a semicolon or splitting into two sentences improves clarity and avoids comma splice. The relative pronoun 'which' is acceptable, but a semicolon makes the causal link clearer.

× What are your future work plans?

✓ What are your future work plans?

Question is correct as written; no student correction required.

× I would like to work in European countries, for example in Scandinavia or Germany, because I want to improve my English skill and design skills by collaborating with diverse team members.

✓ I would like to work in European countries, for example in Scandinavia or Germany, because I want to improve my English skills and my design skills by collaborating with diverse team members.

Use plural 'skills' for 'English skills.' Also include possessive 'my' for parallel structure: 'my English skills and my design skills.' The modal 'would like' is appropriate for future desire.

× Working abroad will also help me learn different design approaches and expand my professional network.

✓ Working abroad will also help me learn different design approaches and expand my professional network.

Sentence is grammatically correct and appropriately uses future 'will' to indicate expected outcome. No change needed.