Websites— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and clear: start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples with brief reasons. Avoid filler words (uh, so basically) and small errors (use plural/singular correctly and correct site names). Use a linking word when adding details.

예시: I usually visit video-streaming sites and news websites. For example, I often watch videos on YouTube for entertainment, and I check news sites like BBC to stay updated. Additionally, I sometimes explore new blogs to learn about trends.

제안: Start with a clear statement naming the website and then give specific reasons. Avoid repetition and pauses; correct pronunciation and small grammar errors ("I feel bored" → "when I'm bored"). Keep it to 2–3 sentences and use linking words like 'because' or 'so'.

예시: My favourite website is Bilibili, which is like the Chinese version of YouTube. I visit it when I'm bored because it has a wide range of entertaining videos and user communities where I can follow creators I like.

제안: Provide a clear main statement about observed changes, then give two specific examples and a short opinion. Avoid trailing off at the end; finish your thought. Use linking words like 'for example' and 'however'.

예시: Yes, many websites now include short-video feeds like TikTok. For example, YouTube and news sites have added short clips and personalized recommendations, which can be useful for quick updates but sometimes feel distracting.

제안: Give a direct topic sentence naming popular types of websites, then list specific popular platforms and briefly explain how people use them. Correct grammar and avoid hesitations or repetition ("share or sharing"). Use linking words like 'for example' or 'such as'.

예시: Social media and short-video platforms are the most popular in my country. For example, Douyin (the Chinese TikTok) is widely used for sharing daily life, chatting with friends, and discovering trends among young people.

제안: Begin with a clear preference statement, then give two specific reasons with linking words like 'because' and 'however'. Mention an exception to show balance (books are better for deep study). Keep it concise (2–3 sentences).

예시: I prefer getting information from websites because they offer the latest updates and multimedia like videos that make learning more engaging. However, I still use books when I need in-depth, carefully edited information for study or research.

제안: Start with a direct yes/no and specify the type of site. Then give one or two concrete details about content and how you would create it. Correct grammar and avoid confusing phrases (clarify 'I am tech-savvy' instead of 'You know Emily').

예시: Yes, I'd like to have a personal blog where I share tech tips and daily reflections. I'm somewhat tech-savvy and plan to design the site myself someday, possibly using a simple CMS like WordPress to publish posts and tutorials.

× Most of the time I visit video stream, so it's like YouTube or bitty ***** for fun.

✓ Most of the time I visit video streaming sites, such as YouTube or Bilibili, for fun.

The phrase 'video stream' is incorrect because the speaker refers to multiple websites or platforms (plural). Use 'video streaming sites' to match plural meaning and natural collocation; also replace 'bitty *****' with the likely proper name 'Bilibili'.

× So basically, uh.

✓ So basically, I visit them to relax and entertain myself.

Original is a sentence fragment lacking a verb and object; it does not complete the thought. Provide a full clause that fits context (visiting websites to relax).

× Well, off the top of my head is definitely Billy Billy, which is the Chinese version of YouTube.

✓ Well, off the top of my head, it's definitely Bilibili, which is the Chinese version of YouTube.

Missing subject and verb after 'off the top of my head'. Use 'it's' to complete the sentence. Also correct the platform name to 'Bilibili'.

× You know what I I feel bored.

✓ You know, when I feel bored, I like to visit this website and watch videos.

Original repeats 'I' and lacks conjunctions to connect clauses. Use 'when I feel bored' to introduce condition and 'I' only once.

× I like to visit this website and watch your videos.

✓ I like to visit this website and watch videos there.

'Your videos' incorrectly addresses the examiner; use neutral 'videos there' or 'videos on it'. Also ensure pronoun refers to the website rather than the listener.

× It's a great way for me to kill time.

✓ It's a great way for me to pass the time.

'Kill time' is informal and acceptable in speech, but 'pass the time' is more natural in this context. No grammatical error but wording improvement for clarity and tone.

× I have noticed that many websites are adding short video features like Tiktok style feeds on top of that.

✓ I have noticed that many websites are adding short-video features, like TikTok-style feeds, on top of their regular content.

Need hyphenation for 'short-video' and 'TikTok-style' as compound modifiers and clarify what 'on top of that' refers to; add object 'their regular content' for completeness.

× There are also recommend things based on what I watched before.

✓ They also recommend content based on what I watched before.

'Recommend' was incorrectly used as an adjective or noun. Use correct verb 'recommend' with subject 'they' (websites) and use 'content' as the object.

× Sometimes it's helpful but.

✓ Sometimes it's helpful, but other times it recommends irrelevant things.

Sentence fragment ending with 'but' lacks the contrasting clause. Provide a completion to express contrast.

× Well, I'd say if social media sites and shoot video platforms are already in China, but I guess the most popular one is Douyin, which is the Chinese equivalent of Tiktok.

✓ Well, I'd say social media sites and short-video platforms are already common in China, but I guess the most popular one is Douyin, which is the Chinese equivalent of TikTok.

Original misuses 'if' and 'shoot' (typo for 'short'). Remove 'if', correct 'short-video', and use 'common' for clarity. Maintain proper contrast with 'but'.

× People can use it to do a wide range of things such as chatting with friends or share or sharing their daily lives.

✓ People can use it to do a wide range of things, such as chatting with friends or sharing their daily lives.

Parallel structure requires gerunds for both verbs ('chatting' and 'sharing'). Remove extra 'or' and ensure parallelism.

× Well, I lean more toward getting information from websites you know, or they can provide you with latest information.

✓ Well, I lean more toward getting information from websites, because they can provide me with the latest information.

Pronoun reference was unclear and inconsistent ('you' vs 'I'). Use 'me' to match speaker and add 'the' before 'latest information'.

× In contrast, information in books can sometimes be outdated.

✓ In contrast, information in books can sometimes be outdated.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no change needed. Included for completeness.

× Plus you can watch videos to learn something on websites, which I think is far more engaging than reading books.

✓ Plus, you can watch videos on websites to learn things, which I think is far more engaging than reading books.

Move 'on websites' closer to 'watch videos' for clarity and use plural 'things' for generality. Add comma after 'Plus'.

× Yeah, it would be fun to have my own website, maybe a personal blog.

✓ Yeah, it would be fun to have my own website, maybe a personal blog.

This sentence is acceptable as-is; no grammatical change required. Included for completeness.

× You know Emily, tech savvy and know a bit about web design, so I'd probably build it myself one day.

✓ You know, I'm tech-savvy and know a bit about web design, so I'd probably build it myself one day.

Original 'You know Emily' appears to be a mistake: likely the speaker meant 'I'm'. Use 'I'm' and hyphenate 'tech-savvy'. Ensure subject 'I' matches following verbs.