Advertisement— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to answer the question directly first by recalling any advertisement from your childhood, even if it's vague. Then, you can add the recent advertisement as an additional detail. Also, avoid informal expressions like "bad words"; instead, say "similar to some Cantonese slang" for a more natural tone.

예시: When I was a child, I remember an advertisement for a popular chocolate brand that was very catchy. However, recently, a Korean soldier commercial caught my attention because the pronunciation sounded similar to some Cantonese slang, which made it quite funny.

제안: Your answer is good but can be improved by combining sentences to avoid fragments and using linking words more smoothly. For example, instead of starting a sentence with 'Because', connect it to the previous sentence. Also, try to use more varied vocabulary like 'commuters' instead of 'people'.

예시: Yes, I do, and I believe advertising on public transport is effective because commuters often get bored while traveling and tend to look around. Therefore, they are more likely to notice the advertisements, which increases product exposure.

제안: Avoid incomplete sentences and unclear parts like '-1'. Also, try to structure your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details using linking words. Use more precise vocabulary such as 'misleading' instead of 'conceal'.

예시: No, I don't really like advertisements because many of them only highlight the positive aspects and can be misleading. For example, I once bought a vacuum cleaner that was promoted as lightweight and convenient, but in reality, its suction power was too weak to remove dust effectively.

제안: Your answer is clear but can be improved by using linking words like 'because' and 'which' more naturally. Also, avoid repeating 'also' and 'and' closely. Try to use more precise vocabulary such as 'showcase' instead of 'show'.

예시: I prefer video commercials rather than static pictures because they not only showcase the product's appearance but also demonstrate how it works, which provides more detailed information to the audience.

제안: Good answer with clear reasoning. To improve, try to use more formal linking words like 'since' instead of 'probably due to', and avoid starting sentences with 'Therefore' without a comma. Also, consider varying vocabulary such as 'personalised' instead of 'based on my preferences'.

예시: Yes, I do, and I find the advertisements on my electronic devices more interesting since the algorithm recommends products personalised to my preferences. As a result, I find them helpful and not annoying at all.

× I believe that it is an effective way to promote products by advertising them on the public transport.

✓ I believe that it is an effective way to promote products by advertising them on public transport.

In English (Malaysia), 'public transport' is generally used without the definite article 'the' when referring to the system in general. Using 'the' implies a specific transport system, which is not intended here.

× Because people often get bored while commuting and tend to look around.

✓ People often get bored while commuting and tend to look around.

Starting a sentence with 'Because' without completing the main clause results in a sentence fragment. In English (Malaysia), it is better to combine it with the previous sentence or rephrase to form a complete sentence.

× No, I don't really like advertisements because many of them only highlight the positive side and conceal the -1 For example, I bought a vacuum cleaner that is promoted as lightweight and convenient, but in reality its power was too weak and even couldn't remove dust.

✓ No, I don't really like advertisements because many of them only highlight the positive side and conceal the negative aspects. For example, I bought a vacuum cleaner that was promoted as lightweight and convenient, but in reality its power was too weak and it couldn't even remove dust.

The phrase 'conceal the -1' is unclear and incorrect. It should specify what is concealed, such as 'negative aspects'. Also, 'even couldn't remove dust' is incorrect; the subject 'it' is needed before 'couldn't'. In English (Malaysia), clarity and correct pronoun use are important for understanding.

× I prefer commercials that are presented in a video rather than just a picture because not only the appearance of their product may be shown, but also demonstrate how it works and this can provide more detailed information to the public.

✓ I prefer commercials that are presented in a video rather than just a picture because not only can the appearance of the product be shown, but also how it works, and this can provide more detailed information to the public.

The original sentence has incorrect conjunction and sentence structure. In English (Malaysia), when using 'not only... but also', the verb forms should be parallel and correctly placed. The corrected sentence improves clarity and grammatical correctness.