Art— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct small grammar mistakes; include one specific recent example and use a linking phrase to show reason or frequency. Keep to 2–4 sentences and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes, I do. I’ve enjoyed drawing since childhood, and I often sketch princess dresses and rainbows in my notebook because it helps me relax. For example, last weekend I spent an hour designing a dress pattern and shading it with colored pencils.

제안: Shorten the answer and structure it with a topic sentence, reason, and a brief example. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' to connect ideas and avoid long run-on sentences.

예시: Yes, I enjoy visiting galleries, especially to see impressionist works. I particularly like Claude Monet because his soft colors and light make me feel calm; for instance, his water-lily paintings always relax me.

제안: Make the response more concise and prioritize one or two specific things you want to learn. Use linking phrases like 'for example' or 'such as' and avoid listing too many items in one sentence.

예시: Yes, I’d like to learn more about art. For example, I want to study the history of painting and the techniques of movements such as impressionism and surrealism so I can understand how artists achieve different effects.

제안: Correct small grammar issues and divide into two clear sentences: one about past learning and one about current practice and benefit. Add a brief specific detail about what you learned or a technique you use.

예시: Yes, we had art classes at school that focused on sketching, line work and shading. Nowadays I still doodle in my notebook to relax; for example, I practice cross-hatching to improve my shading technique.

× Of course, it's one of my favorite pastimes since I was a kid.

✓ Of course, it's one of my favorite pastimes; I have enjoyed it since I was a kid.

The original mixes present simple with 'since' which requires a present perfect tense to show an action continuing from the past to now. Use present perfect ('have enjoyed') or reword to 'I have enjoyed it since I was a kid' to be grammatically correct and show continuity.

× My notebook would always be full of doodles.

✓ My notebook was always full of doodles.

Using 'would' here is unnecessary for a habitual past action; simple past ('was') is clearer. 'Would' can express habitual past but normally requires a clear past-time context; 'was always' is the straightforward past tense description.

× I love going to galleries and seeing all the different paintings and sculptures by various artists, but my favorite would have to be Claude Monet as he is one of the artists that really speaks to me and when I see his paintings I always feel so relaxed.

✓ I love going to galleries and seeing all the different paintings and sculptures by various artists, but my favorite is Claude Monet because he is one of the artists who really speaks to me, and when I see his paintings I always feel relaxed.

Change 'would have to be' to simple present 'is' for a general preference. Use 'who' for people instead of 'that'. Removing 'so' before 'relaxed' makes the sentence more natural. Also add a comma before 'and' to separate clauses.

× if I have the chance, I would definitely learn more about my favorite artist and the history of paint and paintings and the different styles of painting like expressionism, surrealism, and even abstract art.

✓ If I have the chance, I will definitely learn more about my favorite artist, the history of painting, and different styles like expressionism, surrealism, and abstract art.

Conditional: use 'will' (first conditional) after 'if I have the chance' to indicate a likely future action. Replace 'would' with 'will'. Also 'history of paint and paintings' is awkward; use 'history of painting'. Simplify list punctuation for clarity.

× Yes, one of our subjects in school was art and the main focus of our class used to be sketching, like line work and even shading.

✓ Yes, one of our subjects in school was art, and the main focus of our class was sketching, such as line work and shading.

'Used to be' can be acceptable, but here simple past 'was' is clearer and consistent. Replace 'like' with 'such as' for examples. Add a comma before 'and' to join two independent clauses.

× So when I have time I usually doodle in my notebooks which helps me to just relax and sort of through my thoughts.

✓ So when I have time, I usually doodle in my notebook, which helps me relax and sort through my thoughts.

Plural 'notebooks' can be singular 'notebook' to match earlier mention, but either is acceptable; main errors: missing comma after introductory clause and after 'notebook' before the nonrestrictive clause. 'Helps me to just relax and sort of through my thoughts' is incorrect: use 'helps me relax and sort through my thoughts.' Remove filler 'just' and correct verb 'sort' requires 'through' after it.