Internet— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clear and grammatically correct; give a direct topic sentence with correct tense and a brief supporting detail. Avoid unclear words like “rate 7.” Use one or two linking words to add clarity.

예시: I started using the Internet when I was about seven years old. I began after my sister gave me my first smartphone, and I used it mainly for games and learning simple things online.

제안: Answer directly about frequency (e.g., daily, several times a week) and then give a concise reason. Reduce hesitation and redundant phrases; use a linking word like “because” or “so” once.

예시: I go online almost every day because most important information and study materials are available on the Internet, so I check it to keep up with my schoolwork and learn new things.

제안: Give a clear, grammatically correct sentence describing the situation and reason. Use linking words like “because” to explain the reason logically. Avoid vague words and hesitations.

예시: Yes. When I was younger, my father did not allow me to use the Internet because he thought it might distract me from my studies and expose me to harmful content.

제안: Respond directly (Yes/No) then give a concise explanation with specific examples of how you use the Internet for study. Avoid repetitions and hesitations; use linking words like “because” and “for example.”

예시: No, I don’t think I spend too much time online because I am in my final year of high school and I use the Internet mainly for studying, for example, watching lectures, researching assignments, and joining study groups.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence then two or three specific activities as supporting details. Use correct verb forms and linking words like “for example” or “or.” This answer was clear and specific but improve grammar and sentence structure.

예시: If I didn’t have the Internet, I would hang out with my friends and play sports, for example football or baseball. I would also spend more quality time with my family, such as eating out or going to the cinema.

× I think I starting using the Internet when I was rate 7 when I received the first smartphone from my sister.

✓ I think I started using the Internet when I was seven, when I received the first smartphone from my sister.

The sentence uses the wrong verb form 'starting' and an incorrect time expression 'rate 7'. Use past tense 'started' for a completed action in the past (Past tense issue as well, but primary is present tense form misuse). Replace 'rate 7' with 'seven' for correct age expression. Suggestion: use simple past for events that happened in the past and use numerals or words for ages (e.g., 'when I was seven').

× I don't like every day because, uh, I think, uh, nowadays modern area, so, uh, information, important information only have in Internet, so I have to go online to check my, uh, study and, uh, learn new things.

✓ I go online every day because, nowadays, important information is only on the Internet, so I have to go online to check my studies and learn new things.

Multiple errors: word order 'I don't like every day' is incorrect and likely meant 'I go online every day' (sentence structure). 'Nowadays modern area' is redundant; use 'nowadays'. 'Information only have in Internet' uses wrong verb form and missing preposition/article: use 'important information is only on the Internet.' Use 'studies' plural for coursework. Primary grammatical issues: sentence structure and incorrect use of prepositions and verbs. Suggestion: simplify and use correct verb 'is', preposition 'on the Internet', and plural 'studies'.

× Uh, when I was shy, my father was allow me to use the Internet because he saying I was to try.

✓ When I was young, my father did not allow me to use the Internet because he said I was too young to try.

Several problems: 'shy' is wrong word for age; 'young' corrects meaning. 'was allow me' is incorrect passive/tense; use 'did not allow me'. 'he saying' should be past 'he said'. 'I was to try' should be 'too young to try'. Primary issue: incorrect verb forms and wrong pronoun/word choice. Suggestion: use simple past for past reporting and correct adjectives ('young' vs 'shy'), and 'too' for excess ('too young').

× And if I, uh, if I use the Internet soon I, it can, uh, it can, umm, bring many problem for me.

✓ And if I use the Internet too soon, it can bring many problems for me.

Problems: unnecessary filler words removed. Use adverb 'too soon' to express timing; 'bring many problem' needs plural 'problems'. The structure 'it can bring' is correct but original repeated 'it can' is redundant. Primary issue: incorrect noun number and placement of adverb. Suggestion: use plural nouns and place adverbs correctly ('too soon').

× No, because I am in the final years of high school so I think I have to use Internet. Usually I, I have to certain many uh, new learners and, uh, learning, uh, in the online.

✓ No, because I am in the final year of high school, so I think I have to use the Internet. Usually I have to search many new lessons and learn online.

Errors: 'final years' should be 'final year' if referring to last year (number agreement). Missing article 'the Internet'. 'have to certain many new learners' is unclear; likely meant 'search many new lessons' or 'learn many new things'. 'learning in the online' incorrect preposition/form; use 'learn online'. Primary issues: singular/plural and incorrect prepositions/word choice. Suggestion: use correct singular/plural agreement and common collocations ('learn online', 'search for lessons').

× Uh, if I don't have Internet, I can hang out with my friend and playing sport like for example is football or baseball.

✓ If I don't have the Internet, I can hang out with my friends and play sports, for example football or baseball.

Errors: missing article 'the Internet'. 'my friend' should be plural 'my friends' for general activities. Parallel structure requires base verb 'play' not 'playing' after 'can'. Use plural 'sports' for types of sport. Primary issue: verb form after modal and pluralization. Suggestion: maintain parallel verb forms after modal verbs ('can play') and correct articles and plurals.

× Or I can spend my quality time with my family like eating out or go to the cinema.

✓ Or I can spend quality time with my family, like eating out or going to the cinema.

Problems: 'spend my quality time' is awkward; use 'spend quality time'. After 'like' use gerund 'going' for parallel structure with 'eating'. Also comma improves clarity. Primary issue: incorrect verb form and collocation. Suggestion: use common collocations and match verb forms when listing activities ('eating out or going to the cinema').