Internet— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Jawaban Anda kurang jelas dan terdapat pengulangan kata yang tidak perlu. Cobalah untuk memberikan jawaban yang lebih terstruktur dengan kalimat topik yang jelas dan detail pendukung yang spesifik. Hindari pengulangan dan gunakan kalimat yang lebih alami.

예시: I started using the internet when I was in the 5th grade because my school assigned us tasks that required internet research.

제안: Jawaban Anda agak membingungkan dan kurang terstruktur. Gunakan kalimat yang lebih jelas dan hindari kesalahan tata bahasa. Sertakan kata penghubung untuk membuat jawaban lebih koheren dan spesifik.

예시: I go online very often because I enjoy scrolling through social media platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube. Usually, I spend about 7 to 8 hours online each day.

제안: Jawaban Anda kurang jelas dan terdapat kesalahan tata bahasa. Cobalah untuk menyusun kalimat yang lebih sederhana dan jelas dengan detail yang spesifik serta menggunakan kata penghubung yang tepat.

예시: Yes, I remember in 2018 when I started my first job, I was not allowed to use the internet for 10 days as part of the training.

제안: Jawaban Anda mengandung pengulangan dan kurang terstruktur. Gunakan kalimat yang lebih alami dan jelas, serta tambahkan alasan atau rencana untuk memperbaiki kebiasaan tersebut.

예시: Yes, sometimes I think I spend too much time online, especially scrolling through TikTok and other social media. I want to reduce this time to be more productive.

제안: Jawaban Anda cukup baik tapi ada kesalahan tata bahasa dan pengucapan kata. Cobalah untuk membuat kalimat yang lebih alami dan gunakan kata penghubung untuk menghubungkan ide dengan baik.

예시: Without the internet, I would do many activities such as reading books, jogging, running, and baking. However, sometimes these activities can feel a bit boring.

× I don't actually remember about what time I first used the Internet, but I think that was when I in my 5th or 6th grade.

✓ I don't actually remember what time I first used the Internet, but I think that was when I was in my 5th or 6th grade.

The sentence is missing the verb 'was' to correctly indicate the past state of being in 5th or 6th grade. The phrase 'about what time' is also incorrect; it should be 'what time' without 'about'. This correction ensures proper verb usage and clearer expression.

× I I think that I got I caught a duty from my school so that I should use Internet as my duty.

✓ I think that I got a duty from my school so that I should use the Internet as my duty.

The phrase 'I caught a duty' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'got' to indicate receiving a duty. Also, 'Internet' should be preceded by the definite article 'the' when referring to it generally. Removing the repeated 'I' and correcting verb choice improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Since I'm agency that like to scroll social media like TikTok, Instagram, YouTube so that I think it's really often for me to go online like it can be 7 till 8 hours per day to go through Internet I think.

✓ Since I'm an agency that likes to scroll social media like TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube, I think I go online very often, maybe 7 to 8 hours per day to browse the Internet.

The original sentence has multiple structural issues: 'agency' is likely a wrong word choice; it should be 'person' or 'someone'. The verb 'like' should be 'likes' to agree with the singular subject. The phrase 'so that I think it's really often for me' is awkward and incorrect; it should be rephrased for clarity. Also, '7 till 8 hours' should be '7 to 8 hours'. Adding commas and conjunctions improves readability.

× There was a time when I wasn't allowed to use the Internet. It happened when I the first time I go to my work it I think it's about 2018 and it's 10 days without Internet any.

✓ There was a time when I wasn't allowed to use the Internet. It happened the first time I went to work; I think it was about 2018, and I spent 10 days without any Internet.

The phrase 'I the first time I go to my work' is ungrammatical; it should be 'the first time I went to work' using past tense 'went'. 'It's 10 days without Internet any' is incorrect; it should be 'I spent 10 days without any Internet'. Correcting verb tense and sentence structure clarifies the meaning.

× Yes, sometimes I think that I just wasted my time free. I just wasted my time like I don't do anything. I do nothing by just calling Tiktok social another social media and I want to decrease my time to scroll.

✓ Yes, sometimes I think that I just waste my free time. I just waste my time doing nothing. I do nothing but scroll TikTok and other social media, and I want to reduce the time I spend scrolling.

The use of past tense 'wasted' is incorrect when referring to habitual actions; present tense 'waste' is appropriate. 'Calling Tiktok social another social media' is incorrect; it should be 'scroll TikTok and other social media'. 'Decrease my time to scroll' should be 'reduce the time I spend scrolling'. These corrections improve tense consistency and word choice.

× Actually a lot of things I can do without the Internet, like reading a book, jogging, running, baking and many things that I can do without the Internet but it's just so bor boring.

✓ Actually, there are a lot of things I can do without the Internet, like reading a book, jogging, running, baking, and many other things, but it's just so boring.

The word 'bor boring' is a typo and should be 'boring'. The sentence also lacks the verb 'are' after 'Actually' to be grammatically correct. Adding commas and 'other' improves clarity. These changes correct adjective use and sentence structure.