Internet— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer lacks clarity and contains grammatical errors. Try to respond directly with a clear topic sentence, avoid redundancy, and use linking words to connect ideas logically. Also, be specific about your activities online and avoid unclear phrases like 'it might fingerprint'.

예시: I started using the internet when I was about 16 years old. At that time, I bought an Android phone and mainly used the internet to chat with my friends and watch videos. It was exciting because I suddenly had access to a vast amount of information.

제안: Your answer is unclear and contains many unrelated or incorrect words. Focus on giving a direct answer about your internet usage frequency, use linking words to add details, and avoid incomplete sentences. Make sure your vocabulary is relevant and your sentences are coherent.

예시: I go online every day, usually several hours. For example, I often watch YouTube videos, including shorts and longer clips. However, I am trying to reduce the time I spend online.

제안: Your answer is generally clear but contains some awkward phrasing and minor errors. Try to use more natural expressions and correct grammar, and keep your answer concise and relevant. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

예시: I can't remember a time when I wasn't allowed to use the internet because I live alone in a small apartment. I have full control over my internet access, so I can go online whenever I want. This freedom helps me stay connected and complete my daily tasks easily.

제안: Your answer has grammatical mistakes and unclear expressions. Provide a clear opinion with supporting details, use linking words to explain your point, and avoid redundancy. Make sure your sentences are complete and coherent.

예시: Yes, I think I spend too much time online. For instance, last night I spent about nine hours on the internet, which is quite excessive. Therefore, I am trying to reduce the time I spend online.

제안: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Respond directly with a clear topic sentence, use linking words to add specific supporting details, and avoid incomplete sentences. Use relevant vocabulary to describe your hobbies.

예시: Without the internet, I would spend more time on my hobbies, such as reading books and doing engineering projects. For example, I enjoy building small models like cars and drones.

× I started the Internet when I was about 16 or 17 years old at the time.

✓ I started using the Internet when I was about 16 or 17 years old.

The verb 'started' requires a following verb in the '-ing' form to indicate the action that began. 'Started the Internet' is incorrect because 'Internet' is a noun, not an action. The correct phrase is 'started using the Internet.' Also, 'at the time' is redundant here and can be omitted for clarity.

× I finally bought me an Android phone and I began exploring the Internet mainly to chat with my friends and watch 5 videos.

✓ I finally bought myself an Android phone and began exploring the Internet mainly to chat with my friends and watch videos.

The reflexive pronoun 'myself' should be used instead of 'me' after the verb 'bought' to indicate the action was done for the speaker. Also, 'watch 5 videos' is awkward; it is better to say 'watch videos' unless specifying the number is necessary.

× It was quite exciting to have access to so much information it might fingerprint.

✓ It was quite exciting to have access to so much information; it might be overwhelming.

The original sentence is a run-on and contains the unclear phrase 'it might fingerprint.' This likely is a mishearing or typo. The sentence is corrected to separate ideas properly and replace unclear wording with a plausible intended meaning.

× I think it's very suitable and I was always online on my kilogram especially an also in males and I'm circuit in YouTube videos like watching YouTube shorts in other videos, long videos and I'm trying to. And trying to quit.

✓ I think it's very suitable, and I was always online on my phone, especially watching YouTube videos like YouTube Shorts and longer videos. I'm trying to reduce my time online and quit some habits.

The original sentence contains many unclear and incorrect words such as 'kilogram,' 'males,' and 'circuit.' These appear to be errors or mishearings. The correction replaces these with logical words fitting the context. Also, the sentence is split for clarity and grammatical correctness.

× I can't remember a time when I wasn't allowed to use Internet because I live in the bed totally in a small apt.

✓ I can't remember a time when I wasn't allowed to use the Internet because I live alone in a small apartment.

The phrase 'use Internet' requires the definite article 'the' before 'Internet.' Also, 'live in the bed totally in a small apt' is incorrect and unclear; it is corrected to 'live alone in a small apartment' to make sense in context.

× I have full control over my Internet access so I can go online whenever I want without any restrictions.

✓ I have full control over my Internet access, so I can go online whenever I want without any restrictions.

This sentence is grammatically correct; only a comma is added before 'so' to improve sentence flow.

× This freedom makes it easy for me to stay connected and a complete my daily tasks.

✓ This freedom makes it easy for me to stay connected and complete my daily tasks.

The phrase 'a complete' is incorrect; the article 'a' should be removed before the verb 'complete.' The verb 'complete' here is used correctly without an article.

× I think he is.

✓ I think I do.

The phrase 'I think he is' is incorrect in this context. The speaker likely means 'I think I do' to answer the question about spending too much time online.

× I spent very so much time on Internet.

✓ I spend too much time on the Internet.

The original sentence mixes past tense 'spent' with adverbs awkwardly. Since the question is about current habits, present tense 'spend' is appropriate. Also, 'on Internet' requires the definite article 'the'.

× For example, last night I spent about 9 hours a day is very terrible, you know?

✓ For example, last night I spent about 9 hours online, which is very terrible, you know?

The phrase '9 hours a day is very terrible' is incorrect because it mixes time frames and sentence structure. It is corrected to clarify that the 9 hours were spent last night and that this is considered excessive.

× I think I'm I try to reduce that time.

✓ I think I should try to reduce that time.

The original sentence is incomplete and unclear. Adding the modal verb 'should' clarifies the intention to make an effort to reduce time spent online.

× I preferred to doing my heart habits that this reading books or doing engineering like building.

✓ I prefer doing my hobbies such as reading books or doing engineering projects like building things.

The phrase 'preferred to doing' is incorrect; 'prefer doing' is correct. 'Heart habits' is likely a mishearing of 'hobbies.' The sentence is restructured for clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Small things, for example cars or. Or drones and other kind of stuff.

✓ Small things, for example, cars or drones and other kinds of stuff.

The sentence fragments are combined for clarity. 'Other kind of stuff' should be pluralized to 'other kinds of stuff' to agree with the plural noun 'cars' and 'drones.'