Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce hesitations and redundant phrases, give a clear topic sentence then one or two supporting details. Use varied, natural vocabulary and keep it within 2–4 sentences. Mention one specific memory or reason to make the answer more vivid.

예시: Yes — I had a small pink bicycle that I loved. I used to ride it every afternoon around my neighborhood with my friends, and I remember practicing a new trick until I could balance without help. That bike is a fond childhood memory because it gave me freedom and many happy afternoons.

제안: Provide a direct opinion first, avoid many hesitations and unclear phrasing. Support your view with one or two specific reasons and, if possible, a brief example or comparison. Use linking words like 'because' or 'however' to structure the response.

예시: Not really. Because my country is very large and cities are spread out, many people find cycling impractical for daily travel. Additionally, traffic and limited cycling infrastructure make cars and public transport more convenient for most commuters.

× Absolutely. Uh, back in my childhood, I possessed a pink little bike which I, uh, adored with all my heart and uh, yeah, I, uh, I appreciated, uh, this item whole heartedly. And I still am because that's such a great childhood memory.

✓ Absolutely. When I was a child, I had a small pink bike that I adored with all my heart, and I still appreciate it because it is such a great childhood memory.

This sentence contains several issues: inappropriate verb choice 'possessed' (formal and awkward for speaking) and redundant wording 'pink little' (word order and adjective choice), incorrect adverb spelling 'whole heartedly' (should be 'wholeheartedly' but here 'appreciate it' is more natural), and awkward structure 'I still am' without clear complement. Use 'had' for past possession (simple past), place adjectives in natural order 'small pink bike', use 'that' for defining relative clause, and 'I still appreciate it' to show continued feeling. Also avoid filler words for clarity. Suggestions: replace 'possessed' with 'had', use 'small pink bike', use 'that I adored', spell 'wholeheartedly' if used, or simpler 'I still appreciate it'.

× I wouldn't say so actually, because my country, uh, is relatively uh, large and uh, it, it is simply not that convenient for uh, its uh, citizens to uh, ride bikes in order to, and use them as they, uh, they are important.

✓ I wouldn't say so, actually, because my country is relatively large and it is simply not convenient for its citizens to ride bikes or use them as a main form of transport.

This sentence has repetition ('it, it', 'they, uh, they'), unnecessary fillers, incomplete clause 'in order to,' and awkward phrasing 'use them as they are important.' Clarify the intended meaning: contrast size with inconvenience for cycling and state purpose 'as a main form of transport.' Remove fillers and repeated words. Use 'ride bikes or use them as a main form of transport' for grammatical completeness and clarity.