Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Shorten and structure the response: begin with a clear topic sentence answering the question, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid redundant phrasing and long complicated sentences. Work on pronunciation and tense consistency (e.g., use simple past for childhood events).

예시: Yes, I did have a bike when I was a child. However, my parents sold it soon after they bought it, so I never learned to ride. As a result, even now at 20 I still can’t ride a bike.

제안: Be careful with word choice and give a specific example to support your opinion. Start with a clear topic sentence, then use a linking word to add a reason and a concrete example. Replace incorrect words (e.g., 'transformation' -> 'transport') and avoid repeating similar nouns.

예시: Yes, bikes are quite popular in the Philippines. For example, many people use them as a cheap and efficient means of transport in cities, and others ride bikes on weekends for exercise and leisure.

× So as a child I did have a bike, but my parents quickly sold it after buying it, so I was never really able to learn how to ride a bike, which now at 20 years old has persisted. I still do not know how to ride a bike.

✓ As a child I did have a bike, but my parents quickly sold it after buying it, so I was never really able to learn how to ride a bike, and that situation has persisted now that I am 20 years old. I still do not know how to ride a bike.

The original sentence mixes past events with a present-state comment awkwardly. Use 'that situation has persisted' to link the past inability to the present state. Also 'now at 20 years old has persisted' is ungrammatical word order; place 'now that I am 20 years old' after the clause. Keep verb tenses consistent: past actions (did have, sold, was never able) then present perfect for a continuing situation (has persisted). Suggestion: separate past events from ongoing present state and use 'has persisted' for continuity.

× I'd say that bikes are popular here in the Philippines both for practical function and recreational function.

✓ I'd say that bikes are popular here in the Philippines both for practical purposes and for recreation.

'For practical function' and 'recreational function' are awkward collocations; use 'for practical purposes' and 'for recreation' or 'for recreational use'. Also include 'for' before both nouns for parallel structure ('for practical purposes and for recreation'). This improves naturalness and preposition use.

× Practically it is a cheaper form of transformation, whilst recreationally people use it for exercise.

✓ Practically, it is a cheaper form of transportation, while recreationally people use bicycles for exercise.

'Transformation' is a wrong word; the correct noun is 'transportation'. Use 'practically' with a comma for sentence adverb placement. 'Whilst' is acceptable but less common in informal American English; 'while' is more natural here. Also clarify the subject by using 'bicycles' instead of 'it' to avoid ambiguity. These corrections fix word choice and adverb placement.