Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Use correct tense and more concise structure. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Remove filler sounds (uh) and avoid trailing off. Aim for 2–4 sentences and include an exact age and a brief reason or memory to make it specific.

예시: Yes, I did. I received my first bicycle as a birthday present from my parents when I was twelve, and I rode it almost every day during the summers. Because I loved exploring the neighborhood, I soon asked for a second bike to ride with my friends.

제안: Be more structured and specific. Begin with a clear opinion, then give one or two concrete reasons using linking words (for example, because, therefore). Avoid hesitations and complete the sentence with a clear conclusion. Add a brief example or statistic if possible to strengthen the answer.

예시: Yes, I think bicycles are very popular, especially among children. This is because minors are not allowed to ride motorbikes, so parents often buy bikes for safety and recreation; for example, many children cycle to school or play in parks after class.

× Yes. I have a bike when I was a child.

✓ Yes. I had a bike when I was a child.

The sentence mixes present tense 'have' with a past time expression 'when I was a child'. Use past tense 'had' to match the time reference. Suggestion: use past tense consistently for past events.

× It was gifted by my parents on my birthday and I ride it uh very often.

✓ It was a gift from my parents for my birthday, and I rode it very often.

'It was gifted by my parents' is grammatically possible but awkward; 'a gift from' is more natural. Also the clause 'I ride it very often' uses present tense while the context is past, so change to past 'rode'. Use past participle in passive 'was given' or rephrase as 'was a gift'. Suggestion: keep verb tenses consistent and prefer natural passive or active phrasing.

× I was very fond of bikes at that time uh, I was around 12 when I got my first bike and then got my hands on another when uh, I.

✓ I was very fond of bikes at that time. I was around 12 when I got my first bike, and then I got another one later.

Sentence run-on and missing completion. 'Got my hands on another when I' is incomplete. Maintain past tense 'got' and use a clear object 'another one'. Split into two sentences to improve clarity. Suggestion: finish clauses and avoid trailing words; keep past tense consistent.

× Yes. I think bikes are quite uh, popular in my country, especially in younger children uh because uh uh, before teenage they are not allowed to uh ride uh uh, the uh, motorbikes or different vehicles, so their parents uh, tend.

✓ Yes. I think bikes are quite popular in my country, especially among younger children, because before their teenage years they are not allowed to ride motorbikes or other vehicles, so their parents tend to let them use bicycles.

Multiple problems: 'in younger children' should be 'among younger children' (preposition use), 'before teenage' is incorrect—use 'before their teenage years', 'motorbikes or different vehicles' is awkward—use 'motorbikes or other vehicles', and the sentence ends incomplete 'so their parents tend.' Complete the idea: 'so their parents tend to let them use bicycles.' Also maintain present tense for general truths. Suggestion: use correct prepositions, complete comparative phrases, and finish the main clause.