Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more fluent and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words and repetition, and add one specific supporting detail. Use linking words if adding a second point. Keep it under five sentences.

예시: Yes, I did. I owned a bright blue bicycle when I was a child and rode it almost every afternoon around my neighborhood. Because my house was near a park, I often practiced balancing and learned to ride without training wheels within a few weeks.

제안: Organize your answer with a clear topic sentence and then give specific contrasting details using linking words (e.g., however, although, for example). Avoid hesitation and grammatical errors (use 'depends' and 'cities'). Keep to two to three sentences.

예시: It depends on the region. For example, cycling is very popular in northern cities where people use bikes for commuting and exercise, but in smaller towns many people prefer cars because infrastructure for cycling is limited.

× Uh, yeah. You know, when I, uh, when I was a child, uh, I had a bike, I had a, a blue bike, a bike and I rode, I rode with my bike a lot.

✓ Uh, yeah. You know, when I was a child, I had a blue bike and I rode it a lot.

Original sentence uses redundant fragments and repeated verbs which create awkwardness but the main grammar issue is tense consistency and pronoun use for the object. Using simple past 'was', 'had', and 'rode' is correct. Combine clauses to remove repetition and replace the repeated noun 'bike' with the pronoun 'it' to avoid redundancy and improve fluency. Suggestion: Remove filler words and repetitions, keep verbs in simple past, and use pronouns to refer back to previously mentioned nouns.

× You know, you know, it's depend, uh, on the city in my country, in some, uh, city, yes, uh, for example, in the north cities in my country, the riding bicycle is popular, but in some little uh, uh city is, is not popular in the, uh, in, in the people.

✓ It depends on the city in my country. In some cities, for example in the north, cycling is popular, but in some smaller cities it is not popular among people.

Multiple problems: verb form 'depend' should be third-person singular present 'depends' (Present tense issue and subject-verb agreement). Also pluralization and word choice: use 'cities' rather than 'north cities', and 'cycling' or 'riding a bicycle' is more natural than 'the riding bicycle'. Use 'smaller cities' instead of 'little city' and 'among people' instead of 'in the people'. Suggestions: Use 'depends' for third-person singular present, use plural nouns where appropriate, choose natural collocations like 'cycling' and 'among people' to improve clarity.