Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce filler words, start with a clear topic sentence, and add one specific detail to make the answer more vivid. Keep it within 3–4 concise sentences and use linking words to connect ideas.

예시: Yes — I had a bike when I was a child. My parents gave it to me for my eighth birthday, and I used to ride it every evening around our neighborhood. Because it gave me a sense of freedom, I often rode with two close friends and we would race along the park path.

제안: Make a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and add a specific reason or example with a linking word to support your view. Use varied vocabulary (e.g., economical, practical, healthy) and keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are economical and practical for daily travel. Furthermore, many people cycle to stay healthy and to avoid traffic, so cities have built more bike lanes to accommodate them.

× I used to ride it every evening around the neighborhood because I love the freedom and the chance to play with my friends.

✓ I used to ride it every evening around the neighborhood because I loved the freedom and the chance to play with my friends.

The sentence mixes past habitual tense "used to ride" with present tense "I love", which is inconsistent. Both clauses should refer to the past experience. Change "love" to the past form "loved" to maintain consistent past reference and clear meaning. Suggestion: keep related verbs in the same time frame when describing past habits.

× Yes, bikes are very popular in my country and one of the major reasons is it's it is cost effective and also it helps an individual to exercise and feel the freedom while riding on their own.

✓ Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, and one of the major reasons is that they are cost-effective; they also help people exercise and feel free while riding on their own.

This sentence has several pronoun and reference issues: the repeated phrase "it's it is" is redundant, "it" is ambiguous when referring to "bikes" (plural), and "an individual...their" mixes singular and plural pronouns. Use plural references to match "bikes," e.g., "they are." Also replace wordy phrasing with "people" and use a hyphen in "cost-effective." Use a conjunction or semicolon to separate linked ideas. Suggestion: ensure pronouns agree in number with their antecedents and avoid redundancy.

× It was gifted by my parents and it was one of the best gifts I ever received.

✓ It was a gift from my parents, and it was one of the best gifts I ever received.

The phrase "It was gifted by my parents" is grammatically acceptable but sounds awkward. Using the active or clearer passive phrasing "It was a gift from my parents" is more natural. This corrects article and word-order usage and improves clarity. Suggestion: prefer natural collocations like "a gift from someone" when describing who gave something.

× Yes, I had a bike, uh, when I was a child.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.

This sentence is grammatically correct but contains filler "uh" which is unnecessary in written responses. Removing fillers improves clarity and formality. Suggestion: omit spoken fillers in written answers and keep the sentence concise.