Study— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 導入文は明確で自然ですが、情報量を増やすために一文で要点を示した後、具体的な学習内容や理由を短く付け加えるとより効果的です。繋ぎ言葉（for example, such as, because）を使って論理を明確にしてください。文は5文以内に収めましょう。

예시: I'm a university student majoring in Chinese studies. I focus on modern Chinese politics and the language because I'm interested in how political change affects communication. For example, I study current policy debates and contemporary vocabulary used in media.

제안: 答えは自然で論理的ですが、さらに具体性を出すために大学名やキャンパスの特徴を一つ追加すると良いです。接続表現（although, however, because）を使う点は良いので、短い理由や例を付け加えて会話を豊かにしてください。

예시: I study at a university in Tokyo, the capital of Japan. Although Tokyo is a huge city, our campus is surprisingly quiet and has many green spaces, which helps me concentrate during exam periods.

제안: 回答は直接的で支持理由も明確です。さらに説得力を高めるために具体例（教授のサポート方法やコミュニティ活動）を一つ挙げると尚良いです。接続詞（because, also）を使った構成は適切です。

예시: Yes, it's a great place to study because the atmosphere is peaceful and the professors are very approachable. For example, professors hold weekly office hours and student clubs organize study groups that boost motivation.

제안: 要求は明確ですが、改善案の理由や期待される効果（例：集中力向上、学生交流の促進）を短く付け加えるとより説得力が増します。'These days'などの語は口語的で良いですが、フォーマルでは短めにし、接続語（so, because, therefore）で流れを良くしてください。

예시: Yes, I'd like the university to build additional dining halls or common rooms because current facilities are always crowded. This would make it easier to find a place to eat and relax, and it would encourage more student interaction.

제안: 計画と動機が明確で良いです。さらに具体性を出すために、どの分野で研究したいかや希望する大学院の特徴など一つ加えるとより強い印象になります。目的（to, because）を使った構成は適切です。

예시: After graduating, I plan to pursue a master's degree in Chinese studies, focusing on modern political discourse. I hope to graduate with distinction because I want to pursue a research career and eventually become a university lecturer, ideally at a university that supports interdisciplinary projects.

× I'm a university student majoring in Chinese studies.

✓ I'm a university student majoring in Chinese Studies.

Capitalize proper noun fields: 'Chinese Studies' as a course of study is a proper name; also not strictly an article error but aligns with provided list item 22; suggestion: capitalize names of academic disciplines when they are treated as proper nouns.

× I study modern Chinese politics and the Chinese language.

✓ I study modern Chinese politics and Chinese language.

Redundant definite article 'the' before 'Chinese language' is unnecessary when speaking generally. Use 'Chinese language' to refer to the subject area. Suggestion: omit 'the' when naming languages or academic subjects in general statements.

× I study in Tokyo, the capital of Japan.

✓ I study in Tokyo, which is the capital of Japan.

Original sentence uses a comma apposition that is acceptable, but clearer grammar is achieved by using a relative clause 'which is' to explicitly link the fact. Suggestion: use 'which is' to define or explain preceding noun phrases for clarity.

× Although it's a huge city, the campus has a quiet environment which helps me concentrate on my studies.

✓ Although Tokyo is a huge city, the campus has a quiet environment that helps me concentrate on my studies.

Using 'it's' may ambiguously refer to city; better to specify 'Tokyo'. Also 'which' can be replaced by 'that' in restrictive relative clauses. Suggestion: specify referent and use 'that' for essential information.

× Yes, it's a great place to study because it has a peaceful atmosphere and approachable professors.

✓ Yes, it's a great place to study because it has a peaceful atmosphere and approachable professors.

No grammatical change needed; sentence is correct. Included as article-check placeholder: retain as is.

× There's also a strong sense of community, which encourages students to do their best.

✓ There's also a strong sense of community that encourages students to do their best.

Using 'which' after a comma is acceptable for non-restrictive clauses, but here the community's effect is essential; 'that' fits better. Suggestion: use 'that' for defining effects and 'which' for additional, non-essential info.

× Yes, I would like the university to create new dining halls or add some common rooms.

✓ Yes, I would like the university to create new dining halls or add some common rooms.

Sentence is grammatically correct; 'would like' properly expresses desire. Included as modal-check placeholder: retain as is.

× These days the dining halls are always very crowded and I can't even find the room to eat or relax.

✓ These days the dining halls are always very crowded and I can't even find a place to eat or relax.

'Find the room' is unnatural; use 'a place' or 'a seat' to express inability to find somewhere to eat. Suggestion: replace 'the room' with 'a place' or 'a seat' for natural collocation.

× After graduating, I plan to start a master's degree in Chinese studies.

✓ After graduating, I plan to start a master's degree in Chinese Studies.

Capitalize discipline name 'Chinese Studies'. Also 'start a master's degree' is acceptable; alternatively 'pursue a master's degree' is more natural. Suggestion: consider 'pursue a master's degree' for idiomatic phrasing.

× I hope to graduate with distinction because I'd like to pursue a research career and eventually become a university's lecturer.

✓ I hope to graduate with distinction because I'd like to pursue a research career and eventually become a university lecturer.

'A university's lecturer' incorrectly uses possessive; the correct phrase is 'a university lecturer' (a lecturer who works at a university). Suggestion: use noun-noun compound instead of possessive in this context.