Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce hesitation and repetition, improve grammar and sentence structure, and be more specific. Start with a clear topic sentence that answers the question directly, then give one or two concise supporting details (where and why you take photos). Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid filler words like “uh.”

예시: Yes, I do. I usually take photos whenever I travel during the summer because I enjoy capturing different landscapes and city scenes. For example, last summer I visited three cities and took pictures of coastal views and historic streets, which I later posted on social media.

제안: Give a clear direct answer and then compare the two options with specific reasons. Use linking words (however, whereas, because) to make the comparison coherent and correct grammar for singular/plural and articles.

예시: I like both urban and rural views equally. Urban areas appeal to me because of their modern architecture and vibrant street life, whereas rural views are relaxing and full of natural scenery, so I enjoy each for different reasons.

제안: Answer directly and give a balanced, specific comparison. Correct word order and tense, reduce hesitations, and include a short example or reason why views abroad or at home are attractive.

예시: I enjoy views both in my own country and abroad. Social media often shows picturesque scenes from other countries, which I find inspiring; however, when I travel in Vietnam I also discover many beautiful landscapes and cultural sights that I appreciate because they feel familiar and meaningful.

× To be honest, uh, in every summer day, I always, uh, travel in no others other city and country and then have many different views.

✓ To be honest, every summer I always travel to different cities and countries and see many different views.

Original sentence uses incorrect prepositions and awkward word order ('in every summer day' should be 'every summer'; 'travel in' should be 'travel to'); 'no others other city and country' is ungrammatical and should be 'different cities and countries'. Simplify word order and use correct prepositions to match English usage. Suggested improvement: say 'every summer I travel to different cities and countries and see many different views.'

× I can take your photos, uh, because I really like to uh, uh, post my photo in the social media.

✓ I can take photos of you because I really like to post my photos on social media.

Use of pronouns and determiners is incorrect: 'your photos' is acceptable but 'take your photos' sounds odd in context; better 'take photos of you'. Article 'the' before 'social media' is incorrect; use 'on social media'. Also pluralize 'photo' to 'photos' for consistency. Suggestion: 'I can take photos of you because I like to post them on social media.'

× I think I like both urban area view. In rural area views because of in force.

✓ I think I like both urban and rural views.

Original has extra fragments and incorrect quantifiers and noun forms ('both' requires two coordinated items, not separate sentences; 'urban area view' and 'rural area views' are awkward). Remove unnecessary fragments like 'because of in force' which is ungrammatical. Use parallel structure: 'both urban and rural views.'

× In urban we have a modern views and but in rural we have a natural view.

✓ In urban areas we have modern views, but in rural areas we have natural ones.

Agreement and word choice errors: 'a modern views' mixes singular article with plural noun; 'in urban' should be 'in urban areas'. Use plural 'views' and parallel structure. Use 'ones' to avoid repetition. Suggestion: 'In urban areas we have modern views, but in rural areas we have natural ones.'

× I think it's 1/2.

✓ I think it's half and half.

Using '1/2' is informal and not appropriate in spoken answer transcriptions. Express the idea in words 'half and half' or 'I like them equally.' Use present tense simple 'I think' is fine; clarify phrase. Suggestion: 'I think I like them equally.'

× To be honest, when I watch in the social media, I see that the, uh, picturesque view in other countries.

✓ To be honest, when I look at social media, I see picturesque views in other countries.

'Watch in the social media' is incorrect; use 'look at social media'. 'the, uh, picturesque view' uses definite article incorrectly and singular 'view' doesn't fit; use plural 'picturesque views'. Also 'in other countries' is fine. Suggestion: 'When I look at social media, I see picturesque views in other countries.'

× However, in Vietnam I when I travel, I see many uh, beautiful views I like.

✓ However, when I travel in Vietnam, I see many beautiful views that I like.

Word order and missing relative pronoun: 'in Vietnam I when I travel' should be 'when I travel in Vietnam'. Also need 'that' or 'which' before 'I like' to join clauses. Remove filler 'uh'. Suggestion: 'When I travel in Vietnam, I see many beautiful views that I like.'