Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more fluent and concise: avoid fillers (uh), reduce repetition, finish the story with a clear point. Use a topic sentence, then one or two specific supporting details, and a short concluding remark. Also correct small grammar issues (e.g., "a great picture unexpectedly" → "an unexpectedly great photo"; "a picture of river" → "a picture of the river").

예시: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views because I often find unexpectedly beautiful scenes. For example, when I was young I took a photo of the river in front of my house; at the time I thought the area looked plain, but the light made the scene striking. That experience taught me to look for hidden beauty.

제안: Organize the answer with a clear topic sentence and use linking words. Avoid casual slang like "wanna"; use "want to." Remove small mistakes ("capture of nature" → "capture nature"). Give one brief reason for each preference. Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

예시: It depends on what I want to photograph: urban areas are better when I focus on people and architecture because they offer lively scenes, while rural areas are ideal for capturing nature and peaceful landscapes.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence, then give specific reasons and a brief contrast. Correct grammar and phrasing: say "I prefer views in my own country because they are more familiar and remind me of my childhood." Avoid repeating words ("and and"). Add one short comment appreciating views abroad to balance the answer.

예시: I prefer views in my own country because they feel familiar and often remind me of childhood memories. However, I also enjoy views in other countries because they offer new perspectives and different cultural scenes.

× Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because, uh, sometimes I can get a great picture unexpected.

✓ Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because, uh, sometimes I can get a great, unexpected picture.

The adjective 'unexpected' should modify 'picture' and precede it; the original places 'unexpected' after the noun, which is incorrect for a single-word adjective. Move the adjective before the noun and add a comma for clarity. Also 'a great, unexpected picture' keeps the tense and meaning correct.

× For example, when I was young, I took a picture of river in front of my house.

✓ For example, when I was young, I took a picture of the river in front of my house.

When referring to a specific river known in context (the one in front of the speaker's house), English requires the definite article 'the'. Add 'the' before 'river' to indicate a specific noun.

× Uh, at that time I, I thought it was poor, but.

✓ Uh, at that time I thought it was poor, but now I feel differently.

The original sentence ends abruptly with 'but' and repeats 'I,' causing a fragmented structure. Complete the contrast by adding a clause after 'but' and remove the duplicated 'I' to form a complete, grammatically correct sentence.

× It depends on situation on when I wanna take a picture.

✓ It depends on the situation and on when I want to take a picture.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'situation' and incorrect combination 'on when'. Use 'and on when' to connect two conditions. Also replace informal 'wanna' with 'want to' for standard grammar.

× Focusing on people it would be urban areas, but when I am likely to capture of nature it would be rural areas.

✓ If I am focusing on people, I prefer urban areas, but if I want to capture nature, I prefer rural areas.

Original has incorrect clause structure and unnecessary 'of' after 'capture'. Use conditional 'If I am focusing' and parallel verbs 'prefer' and 'want to capture' to make meaning clear and grammatical. Remove the preposition 'of' after 'capture'.

× I prefer views in my own country because it's more familiar to me and it makes me recollect my childhood and my whole life.

✓ I prefer views in my own country because they are more familiar to me and they remind me of my childhood and my life.

'Views' is plural, so use plural pronouns 'they' and plural verb agreement. 'Recollect' is less natural here; 'remind me of' is more idiomatic. 'My whole life' can be simplified to 'my life'.

× Granted other countries view is really cool and and new things.

✓ Granted, views in other countries are really cool and offer new things.

The phrase needs plural 'views' and the definite/possessive structure should be reworked; use 'views in other countries'. Also fix double 'and and' to single 'and' and adjust verb agreement: 'are' for plural. Use 'offer new things' for clarity.