Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make your answer more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid redundant words (e.g., “different various”, “very, very”), and give one specific supporting detail or brief example. Use linking words to connect reason and example.

예시: Yes, I do. I enjoy photographing landscapes because they often look peaceful and visually striking. For example, I like taking pictures of mountain ranges at sunrise because the light and colours change quickly and make the scene dramatic.

제안: Give a clear, grammatical topic sentence and a coherent reason. Avoid repetition and incomplete phrases. State preference directly (urban or rural), give one or two concise reasons, and include a specific example or comparison. Use linking words like “because” or “however.”

예시: I prefer urban views because I like the mix of architecture and green spaces in cities. For instance, I enjoy walking along riverside promenades where modern buildings and parks create interesting photo opportunities.

제안: Provide a complete, fluent response with correct tense and clear supporting detail. Start with a direct topic sentence, give a reason with specific details (when/why), and finish the example or sentence. Avoid trailing off; keep within 3–4 sentences.

예시: I prefer views in my own country because they feel familiar and comforting. Having lived there for a year, I know the best quiet countryside paths; for example, I often walk along a tree-lined lane near my hometown which helps me relax and notice seasonal changes.

× Yeah, yes, I do, because different various views are beautiful and very, very peaceful or very gorgeous.

✓ Yes, I do, because various views are beautiful and very peaceful or gorgeous.

Redundant and awkward adjective use: 'different various' is repetitive. Use a single adjective 'various' or 'different'. Also 'very, very peaceful or very gorgeous' is wordy; reduce repetition for clarity. Suggestion: choose one intensifier (for example 'very') and one adjective ('peaceful' or 'gorgeous').

× So such as beautiful mountains, beautiful green space.

✓ For example, beautiful mountains and green spaces.

The phrase 'So such as' is ungrammatical. Use 'For example' to introduce examples. Also adjective order and noun number: 'green space' should be plural 'green spaces' when referring generally. Combine items with 'and'.

× To be honest that I prefer I prefer is urban areas good for me because it's very beautiful, very calm, especially when I was this dress I have a.

✓ To be honest, I prefer urban areas because they are beautiful and calm.

This sentence has multiple structural problems: redundant phrases ('I prefer I prefer'), incorrect insertion 'that' after 'To be honest', wrong subject-verb reference ('is urban areas'), and an incoherent clause 'especially when I was this dress I have a.' Remove redundancy, use plural subject agreement 'they are' for 'urban areas', and delete the unintelligible fragment. If the student intended a time clause, suggest clarifying it (e.g. 'especially when I walk around them').

× To be honest, I prefer views in my own country because I live there for a year and the places feel familiar and peaceful to me.

✓ To be honest, I prefer views in my own country because I lived there for a year and the places feel familiar and peaceful to me.

Tense mismatch: 'I live there for a year' uses present tense but refers to a past duration. Use past tense 'lived' for a completed period. 'The places feel' can remain present because those places still feel familiar; if intended as past feeling, change to 'felt'.

× For example, I enjoy walking along the quiet countryside where I grew up because it makes me relaxed and.

✓ For example, I enjoy walking along the quiet countryside where I grew up because it makes me feel relaxed.

The sentence is incomplete and ends abruptly. 'Makes me relaxed' is slightly unnatural; use 'makes me feel relaxed' or 'relaxes me'. Add the missing object 'feel' to complete the clause.