Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Améliorer la clarté et la fluidité : éviter les hésitations (comme « uh »), corriger la grammaire (pluriels et accords), et simplifier les idées pour éviter les phrases confuses. Utilisez une phrase d'ouverture directe, fournissez un ou deux détails concrets et terminez proprement. Par exemple, remplacez « I can project myself and then think very deep it's » par une idée claire sur ce que vous ressentez ou pensez. Travaillez aussi la prononciation et le rythme pour paraître plus naturel.

예시: Yes, I love taking photos of different views. Whenever I have free time I often go to the mountainside to capture the cityscape and natural scenery. Being there helps me relax and reflect on my thoughts, so I usually spend an hour or two taking pictures and enjoying the silence.

제안: Clarifier la préférence et organiser la réponse : évitez les contradictions et les erreurs de vocabulaire (« ruler » au lieu de « rural », « manufacture city »). Commencez par une phrase de position claire, puis expliquez deux raisons avec des mots de liaison (for example, however, because). Donnez des exemples concrets (parcs en ville, paysages ruraux) pour rendre la réponse précise et cohérente.

예시: I enjoy both urban and rural views, but for different reasons. In cities I like the contrast between buildings and green parks because there are interesting architectural details to photograph. However, in rural areas I appreciate the peaceful landscapes and wide-open fields, which make for beautiful sunrise or sunset shots.

제안: Rendre la réponse plus structurée et précise : commencer par une phrase claire indiquant la préférence, puis expliquer pourquoi avec un lien logique. Corrigez la grammaire (possessifs, accord, répétitions) et évitez les redondances (« other other countries »). Ajoutez un exemple concret (un lieu familier vs. une expérience nouvelle à l'étranger) pour illustrer votre point.

예시: I prefer views in my own country overall because I know many beautiful places and they remind me of family vacations. At the same time, I enjoy views abroad since discovering new landscapes and cultures is exciting. For instance, I love visiting coastal towns at home, but I also appreciated the mountain scenery when I travelled to Switzerland last year.

× Actually, I love uh views and taking picture.

✓ Actually, I love views and taking pictures.

The noun 'picture' should be plural 'pictures' to match the plural noun 'views' and the general activity of taking photos. Use plural when referring to multiple items or a habitual activity. Suggestion: use 'pictures' or 'photographs' when speaking about taking photos in general.

× Whenever I have time, I always go to the mountainside so I can enjoy the beautiful city and the beautiful view.

✓ Whenever I have time, I always go to the mountainside so I can enjoy the beautiful city and views.

The phrase 'the beautiful view' is grammatically acceptable, but 'views' matches the earlier mention of multiple views and sounds more natural. Maintain present simple tense 'have' and 'go'. Suggestion: keep consistent number (plural) when referring to multiple scenes.

× I can project myself and then think very deep it's.

✓ I can project myself and then think very deeply.

The original ends with an extra 'it's' and uses 'deep' (an adjective) where the adverb 'deeply' is required to modify the verb 'think.' Also the phrase 'think very deeply' is the correct structure. Remove the unnecessary 'it's.'

× If it's come to urban area, I love the nature, I love the green and everything.

✓ If it comes to urban areas, I love the nature, I love the greenery and everything.

Use 'comes' (verb form for 'it') and plural 'areas' when speaking generally. 'Greenery' is a more natural noun than 'the green.' Suggestion: use 'If it comes to urban areas' or 'When it comes to urban areas.'

× And if it come to ruler area I love people.

✓ And if it comes to rural areas, I love the people.

Use 'comes' for third person singular 'it.' 'Ruler' is incorrect; correct word is 'rural.' Use plural 'areas' for general reference and include 'the' with 'people' to refer to those inhabitants. Suggestion: 'When it comes to rural areas, I love the people.'

× I love the manufacture city around me and does it.

✓ I love the industrial cities around me and so do they.

'Manufacture city' is not idiomatic; 'industrial city' or 'manufacturing city' is correct. The original 'does it' is unclear; likely intended 'so do I' or 'so do they.' Choose 'so do they' if referring to people; if referring to self, use 'so do I.' Suggestion: clarify the subject and use idiomatic noun phrases.

× Well, I enjoy the view of both.

✓ Well, I enjoy the views of both.

Use plural 'views' to match 'both' (two types) and generalize enjoyment of multiple views. 'View of both' is slightly awkward; 'views in both' is another option. Suggestion: 'I enjoy the views in both.'

× My own country is my priority 'cause when I'm here I know a lot of place and it remind me the vacation of my family and I when we were together and our other other countries too.

✓ My own country is my priority because when I'm here I know a lot of places and it reminds me of the vacations my family and I had when we were together, and also other countries.

Multiple errors: 'cause' should be 'because' in formal speech; 'a lot of place' should be plural 'places'; 'it remind' needs third person singular 'reminds'; 'remind me the vacation of my family and I' should be 'reminds me of the vacations my family and I had' and use 'me' not 'I' as object of remind. Also fix word order and repetition 'other other.' Suggestion: break into clearer clauses and use correct verb agreement and pronouns.

× I like it 'cause I like new things.

✓ I like it because I like new things.

'Cause' is informal; use 'because' in corrected sentence. The structure is correct otherwise; present simple 'like' is appropriate. Suggestion: avoid contractions in formal corrections.