Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, remove repetition, and add one specific detail about when or why you take photos. Use linking words if you add a second sentence (for example, “because” or “so”).

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of scenery because photos help me capture special moments. For example, when I travel I photograph sunsets and landscapes so I can remember the atmosphere later.

제안: Give a clear preference with a correct topic sentence, avoid repetition, and provide specific reasons and an example. Use linking words (for example, “because,” “so,” or “for instance”) to connect your reasons.

예시: I prefer rural views because they allow me to connect with nature and relax. For instance, walking in a quiet field or by a river helps me unwind after a busy week.

제안: Provide a clear, balanced answer: state you like both, then give two specific contrasting reasons (one for home, one for abroad). Keep it to two sentences and avoid fillers like “uh.” Use linking words such as “however” or “on the other hand.”

예시: I can’t decide because I like both. At home, familiar landscapes relax me and bring memories, but foreign scenery excites me because it offers new cultures and different perspectives.

× Yes, I really like taking pictures of the scenery because I I can capture at the moment and I can remind them after I I go back to go back from the.

✓ Yes, I really like taking pictures of the scenery because I can capture the moment and remind myself after I go back.

Errors: repeated words ('I I', 'go back to go back from') and incorrect phrase 'capture at the moment' and 'remind them' which should be 'capture the moment' and 'remind myself'. Grammar problem type: verb in the present participle form applies because 'taking' is correct but surrounding verb forms and pronouns are wrong. Suggestion: remove duplicate words, use 'capture the moment' (fixed noun phrase), and use reflexive pronoun 'myself' for reminding oneself. Ensure concise structure: 'because I can capture the moment and remind myself after I go back.'

× I prefer view sceneries in rural areas because I can feel the nature of this bad songs, something like that. I can feel relaxed, I can feel relaxed and.

✓ I prefer scenic views in rural areas because I can feel close to nature; I feel relaxed there.

Errors: 'view sceneries' is ungrammatical — use 'scenic views' or 'the scenery'. The phrase 'the nature of this bad songs' is nonsensical and likely a mistake; replace with 'close to nature'. Repetition 'I can feel relaxed, I can feel relaxed and' is redundant. This is a sentence structure and word choice issue. Suggestion: use 'I prefer scenic views' and a concise clause 'because I can feel close to nature; I feel relaxed there.'

× Actually I can't decide because I like both of them in the scenery in my country is uh, made me relax, makes me relax but at the same time the scenery in other countries.

✓ Actually I can't decide because I like both of them: the scenery in my country makes me relax, but at the same time the scenery in other countries does too.

Errors: tense and subject-verb agreement problems: 'is uh, made me relax' mixes tenses and incorrect verb form. Use present simple 'makes me relax' for habitual or general statements. Also missing verb for the second clause; add 'does too' to complete the comparison. Suggestion: use clear present simple forms and complete parallel structure: 'the scenery in my country makes me relax, but ... other countries does too.'