Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct small grammatical issues (e.g., “of different things in random things” is awkward).

예시: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. For example, when I visit restaurants or cafés I often photograph the décor and lighting because they create a pleasant atmosphere and tell a story about the place.

제안: Give a direct preference or clearly state that you like both, and use linking words to contrast. Fix grammar (singular/plural, articles). Provide one specific example for each area to make your answer richer.

예시: I like both urban and rural views because they offer different kinds of beauty. For instance, in rural areas I enjoy wide green fields and quiet rivers, whereas in cities I appreciate the skyline and modern architecture, especially tall glass buildings.

제안: Be clearer and finish your thought. State a clear preference or explain you are torn, and give a specific reason or example. Avoid filler phrases and correct grammar (e.g., “Personally as I’m in Canada right now, I miss the views of my country”).

예시: Although I miss the scenery of my home country now that I am in Canada, I would choose to visit other countries to broaden my experience. For example, I want to see famous coastal landscapes in Portugal and compare them with the mountains I remember at home.

× Absolutely, I love taking pictures of different views or even of different things in random things.

✓ Absolutely, I love taking pictures of different views or even different random things.

The phrase 'in random things' is incorrect word order and redundant. Use the present participle form 'taking' correctly; here the error is ordering and choice of preposition. Reordering to 'different random things' removes the incorrect prepositional phrase and reads naturally. Suggestion: place adjectives before the noun and avoid unnecessary prepositions.

× For example, whenever I go to any restaurant or cafe, I like the pictures of the beautiful settings of the ambience of that place and even.

✓ For example, whenever I go to a restaurant or cafe, I like pictures of the beautiful setting and ambience of the place.

The original has awkward structure and redundancy ('settings of the ambience' and trailing 'and even'). 'Ambience' is uncountable, so use 'a restaurant' instead of 'any restaurant' in this context and 'pictures of the beautiful setting and ambience' is concise. Remove 'and even' which is incomplete.

× I would say both because both the areas have their own beauty.

✓ I would say both because both areas have their own beauty.

Using 'the' before 'areas' is unnecessary when speaking generally. Remove the definite article to correctly refer to areas in general.

× Talking about the rural area, in rural area we get to see fields that is connected to the nature and in urban areas we get to see a lot of buildings especially tall building.

✓ Talking about rural areas, we get to see fields that are connected to nature, and in urban areas we see a lot of buildings, especially tall buildings.

Multiple pluralization and agreement errors: 'rural area' should be pluralized for general reference, 'fields that is' should be 'fields that are' for subject-verb agreement, 'connected to the nature' should be 'connected to nature' (no article with 'nature'), and 'tall building' should be plural 'tall buildings.' Correct these to match plural subjects and natural usage.

× Personally I as I'm in Canada right now so I am really missing the views of my country.

✓ Personally, since I'm in Canada right now, I am really missing the views of my home country.

The phrase 'Personally I as I'm' is ungrammatical; use a subordinating conjunction like 'since' or 'because' to link clauses. 'My country' is fine but 'home country' is more natural. Add commas for clarity.

× But I would say that I would also like to explore and see the views of different countries like how is it there but if I have to choose.

✓ But I would also like to explore the views of different countries to see what they are like; however, if I had to choose...

The original mixes direct question word order ('how is it there') inside a statement; convert to indirect 'what they are like.' Use conditional past 'if I had to choose' to indicate hypothetical preference. Add punctuation to complete the sentence.