Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct minor grammatical errors; start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition ("more than" repeated) and reduce filler words ("I mean", "it's"). Add one specific detail about what kinds of scenes you prefer to make the answer more vivid. Keep to 2–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I love photographing landscapes when I travel. I usually focus on wide views like mountains and sunsets because they capture the atmosphere of a place. For example, I took a panoramic shot of a golden sunset last summer that reminded me of the whole trip.

제안: Good structure and clear preference. Improve by tightening phrasing, avoiding vague words like "constantly happy", and adding a specific example or comparison. Use one linking phrase to connect reasons (e.g., "because" and "whereas"). Limit to 2–3 sentences for clarity.

예시: I prefer rural areas because of the beautiful natural landscapes and relaxed locals. For instance, when I visited a small village I photographed farmers smiling while working in rice fields, which felt more genuine than crowded city scenes.

제안: Answer is understandable but repetitive and slightly unclear. Start with a direct topic sentence ("I prefer views in other countries") then give one concise reason and a specific example of what you want to compare. Avoid filler phrases like "So yeah" and reduce repetition of "would love."

예시: I prefer seeing views in other countries because they offer different cultures and landscapes I haven't experienced yet. For example, I want to compare coastal towns at home with the cliffside villages of Italy to see how architecture and light affect the scenery.

× When I travel, I usually take a lot of beautiful sceneries, more than my own photos.

✓ When I travel, I usually take a lot of beautiful scenery, more photos of places than of myself.

'Scenery' is an uncountable noun in English, so 'sceneries' is incorrect. Use 'scenery' (singular/uncountable) or 'scenes' if you want a countable plural. Also clarify comparison: 'more photos of places than of myself' is clearer and grammatical. Suggestion: Use uncountable nouns correctly and restructure comparisons for clarity.

× I mean, more than including my face or my body in the picture itself because it's it's just such a wonderful feeling to capture beautiful moments.

✓ I mean, I prefer photos of places rather than including my face or body, because it's just such a wonderful feeling to capture beautiful moments.

The original sentence is repetitive ('it's it's') and has unclear structure. Rewriting clarifies the comparison and removes repetition. Ensure subject and verb are present and the comparison is explicit ('prefer... rather than...'). Suggestion: Avoid filler repetition and make comparisons explicit.

× Well, I prefer taking photos in the rural areas because aside from the gorgeous nature and the landscapes, I also would like to capture the smiles of the people who are constantly happy, unlike in urban areas where most people are really busy.

✓ Well, I prefer taking photos in rural areas because, aside from the gorgeous nature and landscapes, I also like to capture the smiles of people who seem constantly happy, unlike in urban areas where most people are very busy.

Use 'rural areas' and 'urban areas' without the definite article when speaking generally. 'The landscapes' is acceptable but 'landscapes' is more natural in a general statement. 'I also would like to' is wordy; 'I also like to' is more natural. 'Constantly happy' is strong; 'seem constantly happy' is softer and more natural. Suggestion: Drop unnecessary definite articles in general statements and prefer concise verb forms.

× I would love to try the views in other countries because I can confidently say that I have travelled most of the beautiful tourist spots in my home country.

✓ I would love to see the views in other countries because I can confidently say that I have visited most of the beautiful tourist spots in my home country.

'Try the views' is unnatural; use 'see the views' or 'visit'. 'Have travelled most of the beautiful tourist spots' is incorrect collocation: one 'visits' spots rather than 'travels' them. Use present perfect 'have visited' to indicate experience up to now. Suggestion: Use correct verbs with collocations ('visit spots', 'see views') and keep appropriate perfect tense for experiences.

× So yeah, I would love to try and distinguish between the two different countries that I can visit.

✓ So yeah, I would love to compare the views in different countries that I visit.

'Try and distinguish between the two different countries that I can visit' is unclear and awkward. 'Compare the views in different countries that I visit' expresses the intended meaning more naturally. Also 'two different countries' may be wrong since earlier 'other countries' was plural; using 'different countries' is safer. Suggestion: Use clear verbs ('compare') and avoid vague phrases like 'try and distinguish'.