Singing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Câu trả lời của bạn cần rõ ràng và tự nhiên hơn. Bạn nên tránh lặp từ và sử dụng cấu trúc câu đơn giản, mạch lạc. Hãy tập trung trả lời trực tiếp câu hỏi và bổ sung chi tiết cụ thể hơn về lý do bạn thích hát.

예시: Yes, I really enjoy singing because it allows me to express my emotions to others. Additionally, singing songs in English and Korean helps me learn new vocabulary and improve my language skills.

제안: Bạn nên sử dụng câu hoàn chỉnh và tránh lỗi ngữ pháp như thì sai. Hãy sắp xếp câu trả lời theo trình tự logic, sử dụng liên từ để câu văn mạch lạc hơn.

예시: Yes, I learned how to sing when I was a child. I asked my mother to enroll me in a music course near our house. I attended the classes for about two months but then I stopped because I found it quite difficult.

제안: Câu trả lời của bạn thiếu sự rõ ràng và có nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp. Bạn nên trả lời trực tiếp, sử dụng câu đơn giản, tránh lặp từ và sắp xếp ý tưởng rõ ràng hơn.

예시: I want to sing for my parents because they love music. When I learn to sing, I want to show them my progress. Also, becoming a singer is my dream since I was a child.

제안: Bạn nên sử dụng cấu trúc câu chính xác và tránh lỗi ngữ pháp. Hãy trình bày ý tưởng rõ ràng, sử dụng từ vựng phù hợp và liên kết các câu với nhau để câu trả lời mạch lạc hơn.

예시: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people because it helps me express my gratitude and makes others feel joyful. Moreover, singing helps me release negative emotions and recharge after a busy day.

× I'm a big fan of singing when I'm saying I can express my feeling to listeners.

✓ I'm a big fan of singing because I can express my feelings to listeners.

The phrase 'when I'm saying' is incorrect here; 'because' is more appropriate to express reason. Also, 'feeling' should be plural 'feelings' to match the context.

× Moreover, I can gain more knowledge knowledge when singing some UK or some K pop and also other languages.

✓ Moreover, I can gain more knowledge when singing some UK songs, some K-pop, and also songs in other languages.

The word 'knowledge' is repeated unnecessarily. Also, 'some UK' and 'some K pop' are incomplete; adding 'songs' clarifies the meaning.

× When I'm just a kid.

✓ When I was just a kid.

The past tense 'was' should be used instead of 'am' to refer to a past time.

× I told my mother that I want to learn singing, and luckily my mother signed me up in a music censure, which was really neat, really near my house, and I learned there just around two months.

✓ I told my mother that I wanted to learn singing, and luckily my mother signed me up for a music course, which was really neat, really near my house, and I studied there for just around two months.

The verb tense should be past ('wanted'). The phrase 'signed me up in' should be 'signed me up for'. 'Music censure' is incorrect; it should be 'music course'. 'Learned there just around two months' should be 'studied there for just around two months'.

× Then I gave up because it's really hard.

✓ Then I gave up because it was really hard.

The past tense 'was' should be used to match the past context.

× Oh, that my parents because they are the biggest fan of music and when I learn music and how to sing that I just want to represent my mother that I can sing and I want to become a singer in the future because it's it is my dream.

✓ Oh, my parents, because they are the biggest fans of music, and when I learn music and how to sing, I just want to show my mother that I can sing, and I want to become a singer in the future because it is my dream.

The sentence is missing verbs and has pronoun errors. 'That my parents' should be 'my parents'. 'Biggest fan' should be plural 'biggest fans' to agree with 'they'. 'Represent my mother' is unclear; 'show my mother' is better.

× When I'm choose a small it's just.

✓ When I was small, it was just a dream.

The original sentence is incomplete and ungrammatical. It should be restructured to express the intended meaning clearly.

× Yes, obviously singing is this way to express my gratitude and make other happiness.

✓ Yes, obviously singing is a way to express my gratitude and make others happy.

'This way' should be 'a way'. 'Make other happiness' is incorrect; it should be 'make others happy'.

× Moreover, MMM singing is also helped me to release my negative feeling and recharge my batteries after a busy day.

✓ Moreover, singing also helps me to release my negative feelings and recharge my batteries after a busy day.

'MMM' seems to be a filler and should be removed. 'Is also helped me' is incorrect; it should be 'also helps me'. 'Feeling' should be plural 'feelings'.