Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to avoid filler words like 'uh' and 'umm' and reduce redundancy such as 'most favorite' and 'every other meal'. Also, provide a clearer reason why you like chocolate to make your answer more effective and natural.

예시: Yes, I really enjoy eating chocolate because it satisfies my sweet cravings and makes me feel happy after meals.

제안: Avoid unclear or contradictory statements like 'it just makes me sad'. Use linking words to connect ideas and be specific about frequency. Also, remove filler words and correct grammar for clarity.

예시: I often eat chocolate after lunch or dinner because I usually crave something sweet at those times.

제안: Try to complete your sentences fully and avoid repetition like 'I, I'. Use linking words to connect ideas and explain clearly. Also, avoid filler words and improve sentence structure for better clarity.

예시: Yes, I have loved chocolate since childhood because my parents also enjoyed it. Although I had cavities, I couldn't stop eating chocolate because it tastes so good.

제안: Avoid filler words and unclear phrases like 'this, uh, real'. Use more precise vocabulary and linking words to explain your opinion clearly and naturally.

예시: Chocolate is popular worldwide because its rich sweetness can instantly improve people's mood and bring happiness.

제안: Try to avoid filler words and improve sentence flow by using linking words. Also, be more concise and avoid redundancy like 'most favorite'.

예시: I like many types of chocolate, but recently I prefer dark chocolate because of its health benefits. I also enjoy hazelnut-flavored chocolate.

제안: Avoid filler words and improve sentence structure for clarity. Use linking words to connect ideas and be more concise to make your answer more natural and effective.

예시: Yes, chocolate is a great gift because it makes people happy and shows love and affection.

× chocolate is one of my most favorite food

✓ chocolate is one of my most favorite foods

The word 'food' should be plural 'foods' because 'one of my most favorite' refers to one item among many, so the noun should be plural to indicate multiple types of food.

× I like to have munch on chocolates after my every other meal

✓ I like to munch on chocolates after every other meal

The phrase 'have munch on' is incorrect; 'munch on' is the correct verb phrase. Also, 'my every other meal' is awkward; 'every other meal' is sufficient and correct.

× I usually eat chocolate quite often, especially after having any meals such as dinner or lunch

✓ I usually eat chocolate quite often, especially after having meals such as dinner or lunch

The word 'meals' is plural, so 'any meals' is acceptable but 'any' is unnecessary here; removing 'any' makes the sentence more natural.

× That's when the time that I feel most craved for chocolates

✓ That's the time when I crave chocolates the most

The phrase 'feel most craved for chocolates' is incorrect; 'crave chocolates the most' is the correct expression. Also, 'That's when the time' is redundant; 'That's the time when' is correct.

× I like to, umm, have a piece of it

✓ I like to, umm, have a piece of chocolate

The pronoun 'it' is vague here; specifying 'chocolate' clarifies the meaning.

× basically it's, it's just makes me sad

✓ basically, it just makes me sad

The phrase 'it's just makes' is incorrect; 'it just makes' is correct because 'it' is the subject and 'makes' is the verb; 'it's' (it is) is unnecessary here.

× I am a chocolate lover from my childhood

✓ I have been a chocolate lover since my childhood

The present tense 'am' is incorrect for a past starting point; 'have been' with 'since' correctly expresses a state from the past to present.

× I got to know that I got cavity at a very young age

✓ I found out that I had cavities at a very young age

The phrase 'got to know' is informal; 'found out' is better. Also, 'got cavity' is incorrect; 'had cavities' is correct plural form and past tense.

× but that didn't also stop me from having chocolates till now

✓ but that hasn't stopped me from having chocolates until now

The present perfect tense 'hasn't stopped' is appropriate to indicate an action continuing to the present; 'didn't' is simple past and does not fit with 'till now'.

× Uh, actually it's something it's very hard to

✓ Uh, actually, it's something very hard to give up

The sentence is incomplete and lacks an object; adding 'give up' completes the thought and corrects the sentence structure.

× chocolate is a type of food that can actually bring an instant smile in your face

✓ chocolate is a type of food that can actually bring an instant smile to your face

The correct preposition with 'smile' and 'face' is 'to', not 'in'.

× The richness and the, uh, sweetness of this, uh, real can really bring a joy and live to your mood instantly

✓ The richness and the sweetness of this really can bring joy and life to your mood instantly

The word 'real' is incorrect here; likely a mispronunciation or error. Also, 'a joy and live' should be 'joy and life'. The pronoun 'this' is vague and can be omitted for clarity.

× I enjoy varieties of chocolates and I don't really mind any types of flavour

✓ I enjoy various chocolates and I don't really mind any type of flavour

'Varieties of chocolates' is awkward; 'various chocolates' is better. Also, 'any types of flavour' should be 'any type of flavour' because 'any' is singular here.

× after knowing the goodness of the health benefits of dark chocolates

✓ after learning about the health benefits of dark chocolate

The phrase 'knowing the goodness of the health benefits' is awkward; 'learning about the health benefits' is clearer. Also, 'dark chocolates' should be singular 'dark chocolate' when referring to the type.

× hazelnuts are my most favorite one

✓ hazelnuts are my most favorite

'Most favorite one' is incorrect because 'hazelnuts' is plural; 'most favorite' suffices without 'one'.

× I think it's a very good choice to gift another, uh, chocolate

✓ I think it's a very good choice to gift someone chocolate

The phrase 'gift another chocolate' is incorrect; 'gift someone chocolate' is the correct structure.

× if someone is getting chocolate as a gift, they will be very happy to receive them

✓ if someone is getting chocolate as a gift, they will be very happy to receive it

The pronoun 'them' is plural and does not agree with singular 'chocolate'; 'it' is the correct singular pronoun.

× it also shows love and affection towards other

✓ it also shows love and affection towards others

The word 'other' should be plural 'others' to refer to other people.