Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to make your answer more concise and avoid redundancy. For example, instead of repeating 'go to treat' and 'usually I eat lots of chocolate', you can say: 'I love chocolate because it makes me happy, and I usually enjoy it after meals. However, due to health issues, I now eat it in moderation.' This will make your answer more natural and effective.

예시: I love chocolate because it makes me happy, and I usually enjoy it after meals. However, due to health issues, I now eat it in moderation.

제안: Avoid repeating phrases like 'go to treat' and improve sentence structure for clarity. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly. For example: 'I used to eat chocolate frequently, but since being diagnosed with some health problems, I now consume it in small amounts. Nevertheless, I still enjoy it occasionally.'

예시: I used to eat chocolate frequently, but since being diagnosed with some health problems, I now consume it in small amounts. Nevertheless, I still enjoy it occasionally.

제안: Your answer has some repetition and unclear parts. Try to structure your answer clearly with linking words. For example: 'Yes, I frequently ate chocolate as a child. My brother used to bring different types of chocolate from Uki, which gave me many happy memories.'

예시: Yes, I frequently ate chocolate as a child. My brother used to bring different types of chocolate from Uki, which gave me many happy memories.

제안: Try to use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid informal phrases like 'go to treat'. For example: 'Chocolate is popular worldwide because there are many varieties to suit different tastes. Moreover, many people have a sweet tooth, and chocolate is easily available. Additionally, effective marketing by chocolate brands makes it very appealing.'

예시: Chocolate is popular worldwide because there are many varieties to suit different tastes. Moreover, many people have a sweet tooth, and chocolate is easily available. Additionally, effective marketing by chocolate brands makes it very appealing.

제안: Improve sentence clarity and grammar. Use linking words to connect ideas. For example: 'When I was young, I liked milk chocolate because my mother used to spread it on bread to make a healthy and tasty chocolate sandwich. Therefore, I still enjoy milk chocolate today.'

예시: When I was young, I liked milk chocolate because my mother used to spread it on bread to make a healthy and tasty chocolate sandwich. Therefore, I still enjoy milk chocolate today.

제안: Make your answer more concise and use linking words for coherence. For example: 'Yes, I believe gifting chocolate is a good way to show love and care. Since chocolates come in various flavours and are easily available, they make convenient and thoughtful gifts.'

예시: Yes, I believe gifting chocolate is a good way to show love and care. Since chocolates come in various flavours and are easily available, they make convenient and thoughtful gifts.

× I love consuming chocolate as it makes me feel happy and it is my go to treat after having lunch and dinner.

✓ I love eating chocolate as it makes me feel happy and it is my go-to treat after lunch and dinner.

The verb 'love' is commonly followed by the gerund form '-ing' to express enjoyment of an activity. 'Consuming' is correct but less natural here; 'eating' is more appropriate. Also, 'go to' as an adjective should be hyphenated as 'go-to'.

× Usually I eat lots of chocolate but because of my health issues now I have I am consuming little chocolate.

✓ Usually I eat a lot of chocolate but because of my health issues now I am consuming little chocolate.

'Lots of' is informal and 'a lot of' is more appropriate in this context. Also, 'little' without 'a' means almost none, which fits the intended meaning here. The sentence was also reordered for clarity.

× I frequently used to eat chocolate but as I have been diagnosed with some problems, I consume them in small amount but still chocolate is my go to treat.

✓ I used to eat chocolate frequently but since I have been diagnosed with some problems, I consume it in small amounts, but chocolate is still my go-to treat.

'Used to' expresses past habits and should be followed by the base verb. 'Consume them' is incorrect because 'chocolate' is uncountable and singular here, so 'it' is correct. 'Small amount' should be plural 'small amounts' when referring to quantity. Also, 'go to' should be hyphenated as 'go-to'.

× Yes, I used I frequently used to eat chocolate.

✓ Yes, I frequently used to eat chocolate.

The phrase 'used to' already indicates past habitual action; repeating 'used' is redundant and incorrect.

× There were various types of chocolate and as my brother used to bring them from Uki had lots of fun memories associated with it.

✓ There were various types of chocolate, and as my brother used to bring them from Uki, I had lots of fun memories associated with it.

The original sentence lacks a subject in the second clause. Adding 'I' clarifies who had the memories. Also, commas improve readability.

× There are various kinds of chocolates and many people have sweet tooth so chocolate is their go to treat and it is easily available and chocolate brand also do lots of marketing so it is eye-catching.

✓ There are various kinds of chocolate and many people have a sweet tooth, so chocolate is their go-to treat. It is easily available, and chocolate brands also do lots of marketing, so it is eye-catching.

'Chocolate' is uncountable here, so 'kinds of chocolate' is correct, not 'kinds of chocolates'. 'Sweet tooth' requires the article 'a'. 'Go to' should be hyphenated as 'go-to'. 'Chocolate brand' should be plural 'chocolate brands' to agree with 'also do'. The sentence was split for clarity.

× When I was young I used to like milk chocolate. I as my mother used to spread it on a bread and make very healthy and tasty bread and butter chocolate sandwich.

✓ When I was young, I used to like milk chocolate, as my mother used to spread it on bread and make a very healthy and tasty bread and butter chocolate sandwich.

'On a bread' is incorrect; 'bread' is uncountable and does not take 'a'. Also, commas improve sentence flow. Added 'a' before 'very healthy...' to correctly modify 'sandwich'.

× Yes, I believe gifting chocolate is one of the way of showing people you really love or care about them.

✓ Yes, I believe gifting chocolate is one of the ways of showing people you really love or care about them.

'One of the way' is incorrect; it should be 'one of the ways' because 'ways' is plural after 'one of the'.