Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to make your answer more natural and clear by avoiding repetition and grammatical errors. Use a clear topic sentence and support it with specific reasons. For example, explain how chocolate gives you energy and helps you focus, using linking words to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I really like eating chocolate, especially when I share it with my daughter. It gives me a lot of energy during the day and helps me concentrate better.

제안: Improve your answer by using more natural expressions and linking words. Avoid repeating phrases and clarify your reasons with specific details. For example, explain your health concerns and family history clearly.

예시: I don't eat chocolate very often now because I'm trying to take care of my health. Also, since my mother had diabetes, I'm a bit worried about developing the same condition.

제안: Make your answer more coherent and complete by using linking words and finishing your thoughts. Avoid hesitations and incomplete sentences. Provide specific examples of occasions when you ate chocolate as a child.

예시: I didn't eat chocolate very often as a kid because my mother rarely bought it. Usually, I only had chocolate during holidays or special celebrations.

제안: Try to organize your answer logically using linking words and clearer vocabulary. Explain your ideas fully and avoid repetition. For example, mention how chocolate is linked to happiness and social occasions.

예시: Chocolate is popular worldwide because it is often associated with happy emotions and social events like parties. It also releases hormones that make people feel good when they eat it.

제안: Your answer is clear and relevant. To improve, you can add a reason why you like that flavour and use linking words to expand your answer naturally.

예시: I prefer chocolate with crunchy flavors, such as nuts. In particular, I like white chocolate with hazelnuts because the combination of creamy and crunchy textures is delicious.

제안: Make your answer more fluent and structured by avoiding repetition and using linking words. Clearly explain why chocolate is a good gift and what it expresses.

예시: Yes, I think chocolate makes a great gift because it shows appreciation and gratitude. Giving someone a good bar of chocolate can make them feel valued and happy.

× I like it because it takes it makes it takes me a lot of energy during the day and help me to be more concentrate.

✓ I like it because it gives me a lot of energy during the day and helps me to concentrate more.

The original sentence incorrectly uses 'takes' and 'help' instead of 'gives' and 'helps'. Also, 'concentrate' should be used instead of 'concentrate' as a verb without 'to be'. The verb 'help' requires the third person singular form 'helps' to agree with the singular subject 'it'.

× Now, not very often, because I try to cut down the consuming of chocolate in my life, because I try to look after my body, my health, and because also my mother, she had diabetes.

✓ Now, not very often, because I try to cut down on consuming chocolate in my life, because I try to look after my body and my health, and also because my mother had diabetes.

The phrase 'cut down the consuming' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'cut down on consuming'. Also, 'because also my mother, she had diabetes' is redundant; it should be 'also because my mother had diabetes'. The preposition 'on' is necessary after 'cut down'.

× So I I afraid a little bit to have the same problem.

✓ So I am a little bit afraid of having the same problem.

The modal verb 'am' is missing after 'I'. Also, 'afraid to have' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'afraid of having'. The verb 'have' should be in the gerund form 'having' after 'afraid of'.

× Did you often eat chocolate when you were a kid? Student: I would say that not very often because I remember that when I was a kid, my mother, she rarely bought chocolate for me.

✓ I would say not very often because I remember that when I was a kid, my mother rarely bought chocolate for me.

The phrase 'my mother, she rarely bought' is redundant; the subject 'my mother' alone is sufficient. Also, 'would say that not very often' should be 'would say not very often' for smoother expression. The past tense 'bought' is correctly used here.

× Because the chocolate associates with the good emotions and with maybe friends and some I know some party and I think it's because it produce some hormones that happy hormones and you feel better when you you while you are eating shop.

✓ Because chocolate is associated with good emotions, maybe with friends and parties, and I think it's because it produces some happy hormones that make you feel better while you are eating chocolate.

The phrase 'the chocolate associates with' is incorrect; the passive form 'is associated with' is appropriate. 'Some I know some party' is unclear and corrected to 'maybe with friends and parties'. 'Produce' should be 'produces' to agree with singular subject 'it'. 'Eating shop' is incorrect; it should be 'eating chocolate'.

× I prefer eating chocolate with some crunchy flavors, like some nuts.

✓ I prefer eating chocolate with crunchy flavors, like nuts.

The word 'some' before 'crunchy flavors' and 'nuts' is unnecessary and can be omitted for natural expression. 'Crunchy' correctly describes the flavors.

× Particularly I like the hazelnut in white chocolate.

✓ Particularly, I like hazelnuts in white chocolate.

'Hazelnut' should be plural 'hazelnuts' when referring to the flavor in chocolate generally. Also, a comma after 'Particularly' improves sentence clarity.

× I think the some a good bar of chocolate, some a good chocolate. It's a good present for somebody and to show to people that you appreciate this person and or you if you want to thank to this person.

✓ I think a good bar of chocolate is a good present for somebody to show that you appreciate this person or if you want to thank them.

The phrase 'the some a good bar' is incorrect; it should be 'a good bar'. 'Some a good chocolate' is incorrect and omitted. 'To show to people' is simplified to 'to show'. 'Thank to this person' should be 'thank them'. The pronoun 'them' is appropriate here.