Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to make your answer more natural and structured. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add specific reasons without repeating the same idea. Avoid redundancy and use linking words to connect your ideas.

예시: Yes, I really enjoy eating chocolate because it has been my favourite treat since childhood. Moreover, I find its rich taste very satisfying, which is why I often choose it as a snack.

제안: Your answer is unclear and lacks coherence. Use linking words to connect ideas and be specific about frequency. Also, explain health benefits clearly and avoid grammatical errors.

예시: I usually eat chocolate once a week, mainly dark chocolate, because it is considered healthy. For example, dark chocolate contains antioxidants that are good for heart health.

제안: Make your answer more fluent and structured. Start with a clear statement, then explain with specific details. Avoid grammatical mistakes and use linking words for coherence.

예시: Yes, I often ate chocolate as a child because my father used to bring me many chocolates. This helped me develop a habit of enjoying chocolates regularly.

제안: Your answer is confusing and incomplete. Try to give a clear reason why chocolate is popular, mentioning taste and health benefits separately. Use linking words and complete your sentences.

예시: Chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes delicious and many people enjoy it. Additionally, dark chocolate is considered healthy as it benefits the heart and overall well-being.

제안: Try to express your preferences clearly and avoid repetition. Use linking words to compare flavours and explain reasons with specific details.

예시: My favourite flavour is hazelnut chocolate because I enjoy the crunchy texture and rich taste. However, I also prefer dark chocolate for its health benefits.

제안: Make your answer more concise and natural. Start with a clear opinion, then give specific reasons using linking words. Avoid redundancy and awkward phrasing.

예시: Yes, I think chocolates make great gifts because most people enjoy them. They are soothing and can bring joy to anyone who receives them.

× Yeah, I love to eat chocolate because it's my favorite since my childhood and mostly I prefer to eat chocolates.

✓ Yeah, I love eating chocolate because it's been my favorite since my childhood and mostly I prefer eating chocolates.

The verb 'love' is commonly followed by the gerund form '-ing' when expressing general preferences or habits. Also, 'since my childhood' requires the present perfect tense 'has been' to indicate an action continuing from the past to present.

× I mostly prefer to eat chocolates after a week because it's we can say it is a healthy.

✓ I mostly prefer to eat chocolates once a week because we can say it is healthy.

The phrase 'after a week' is better expressed as 'once a week' to indicate frequency. Also, 'it's we can say it is a healthy' is incorrect; 'we can say it is healthy' is the correct form without 'it's'.

× Also. For example, we can take dark chocolate a as it is very healthy for us majorly.

✓ Also, for example, we can take dark chocolate as it is very healthy for us mainly.

The article 'a' is incorrectly placed before 'as'. Also, 'majorly' is not appropriate here; 'mainly' is the correct adverb to express the intended meaning.

× It is early for our heart and it would be like very good for heart in our future.

✓ It is good for our heart and it would be very beneficial for the heart in our future.

'Early' is incorrectly used; 'good' or 'beneficial' fits better. Also, 'like very good' is incorrect; 'very beneficial' is appropriate. 'Heart' needs the definite article 'the' when referring to the organ.

× Yeah, I love to eat chocolate. When I was a kid, 'cause my father always bring me a lot of bunch of chocolates, where from that I got a habit of eating many chocolates.

✓ Yeah, I loved to eat chocolate. When I was a kid, my father always brought me a lot of chocolates, from which I developed a habit of eating many chocolates.

The verb 'love' should be in past tense 'loved' to match 'when I was a kid'. 'Bring' should be 'brought' for past tense. 'A lot of bunch of chocolates' is redundant; 'a lot of chocolates' is correct. 'Where from that' is incorrect; 'from which' is appropriate.

× As many people eat chocolates as they taste and many people prefer to eat chocolates as their health also because as we can say that dark chocolate is very healthier other than more chocolates and dark chocolate is very beneficial for our body parts like majorly it's beneficial for heart because it.

✓ Many people eat chocolates because of their taste, and many prefer to eat chocolates for their health as well. We can say that dark chocolate is healthier than other chocolates and is very beneficial for our body parts, mainly for the heart.

The sentence had incorrect pronoun use and awkward phrasing. 'As many people eat chocolates as they taste' is incorrect; it should be 'because of their taste'. 'Very healthier' is incorrect; 'healthier' alone suffices. 'Other than more chocolates' is incorrect; 'than other chocolates' is correct. The sentence was fragmented and needed restructuring.

× My favorite flavor of chocolate is majorly hazelnut because it help like it makes me feel very good because I love that crunchy 1 chocolates and I love the taste of them even though I mostly prefer the dark chocolates 'cause it they are very good and credible for us.

✓ My favorite flavor of chocolate is mainly hazelnut because it helps me feel very good. I love those crunchy chocolates and their taste, although I mostly prefer dark chocolates because they are very good and beneficial for us.

'Majorly' is incorrect; 'mainly' is appropriate. 'Help like it makes me feel' is awkward; 'helps me feel' is correct. 'Crunchy 1 chocolates' is incorrect; 'those crunchy chocolates' is correct. 'Credible' is incorrect in this context; 'beneficial' fits better.

× Yeah, it's good to use chocolates to gift any other person because majorly many people love to eat chocolates and they will love to have a treat as a chocolate because chocolate is very like soothing and calming for every person and majorly every person like to eat them.

✓ Yeah, it's good to give chocolates as gifts to others because many people love to eat chocolates and would love to have a chocolate treat. Chocolate is very soothing and calming for everyone, and most people like to eat it.

'Use chocolates to gift any other person' is awkward; 'give chocolates as gifts to others' is better. 'Majorly' is incorrect; 'many' or 'most' is appropriate. 'They will love to have a treat as a chocolate' is awkward; 'would love to have a chocolate treat' is better. 'Chocolate is very like soothing' is incorrect; 'Chocolate is very soothing' is correct. 'Every person like' should be 'most people like' for subject-verb agreement and naturalness.