Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is generally relevant but contains several grammatical errors and some unclear phrases, such as 'boost innergy vanover feel low'. Try to use clearer and more natural expressions, and avoid redundancy by combining ideas more smoothly. Also, limit your answer to about 4-5 sentences for better coherence.

예시: I love eating chocolate because it tastes delicious and contains caffeine, which helps boost my energy when I feel tired. For example, after a long day at work, I often eat chocolate at night to feel more alert.

제안: Your answer repeats some points from the previous question and has unclear phrases like 'it stopped touch'. Try to avoid repetition and use clearer linking words to connect your ideas. Also, check your grammar and sentence structure for clarity.

예시: I eat chocolate every night because I enjoy its delicious taste. Additionally, the caffeine in chocolate helps me stay alert and focused after a tiring day.

제안: Your answer has several grammatical mistakes and unclear sentences, such as 'I have each of many chocolates' and 'It also effects my health, especially my. Oral dental health.' Try to use simpler, clearer sentences and avoid fragmented thoughts. Also, provide more specific details to support your answer.

예시: Yes, I often ate chocolate as a child because there was a shop near my home, so it was easy to buy. However, eating too much chocolate affected my dental health negatively.

제안: Your answer is fragmented and contains grammatical errors. Try to form complete sentences and use linking words to connect your ideas logically. Also, explain your points more clearly and avoid short, choppy sentences.

예시: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes delicious and has a smooth texture. Moreover, people often give chocolates as gifts, which adds to their popularity.

제안: Your answer has several incomplete sentences and unclear phrases like 'good for house' and 'made some mind more alert'. Try to use complete sentences and clearer vocabulary. Also, explain your reasons more precisely and avoid redundancy.

예시: My favourite flavour is dark chocolate because of its slightly bitter taste. It also contains more caffeine and less sugar than other chocolates, which helps boost energy and improve focus.

제안: Your answer has grammatical errors and unclear expressions such as 'multiple users' and 'people offer like to exchange chocolates as gift'. Try to use clearer and more natural sentences, and explain your ideas more logically with linking words.

예시: Yes, I think chocolate makes a good gift because it can be enjoyed in many ways, such as eating or making flavored drinks. This versatility makes chocolates a popular choice for gifts.

× I love eating chocolate because of its delicious taste and moreover it is also beneficial for over health as it contains caffeine so it boost innergy vanover feel low.

✓ I love eating chocolate because of its delicious taste and moreover it is also beneficial for our health as it contains caffeine so it boosts energy when I feel low.

The pronoun 'over' is incorrect and should be 'our' to indicate possession. Also, 'boost' should be 'boosts' to agree with the singular subject 'it'. 'Innergy vanover' seems to be a typo and corrected to 'energy when I'.

× I love eating chocolate because of its delicious taste and moreover it is also beneficial for over health as it contains caffeine so it boost innergy vanover feel low.

✓ I love eating chocolate because of its delicious taste and moreover it is also beneficial for our health as it contains caffeine so it boosts energy when I feel low.

The verb 'boost' should be in third person singular form 'boosts' to agree with the singular subject 'it'.

× For example, I often like to eat chocolates at night when I feel tide by working the whole day.

✓ For example, I often like to eat chocolates at night when I feel tired after working the whole day.

The word 'tide' is incorrect; the correct adjective is 'tired' to describe feeling fatigued. Also, 'by working' should be 'after working' to indicate the time relation properly.

× I eat chocolate daily at night, as I told earlier. After a long tiring day I love to eat chocolates because of it delicious taste and it stopped touch and also it contains caffeine which is good for health making the brain more alert and focused.

✓ I eat chocolate daily at night, as I told earlier. After a long tiring day I love to eat chocolates because of its delicious taste and it soothes the throat and also it contains caffeine which is good for health making the brain more alert and focused.

The pronoun 'it' should be 'its' to show possession. 'Stopped touch' is incorrect; likely intended 'soothes the throat' or similar. Correcting to 'soothes the throat' makes the sentence meaningful.

× Yes, I have each of many chocolates when I was a kid because there was a shop in front of my home and I didn't have to do any extra efforts to get the chocolates.

✓ Yes, I ate many chocolates when I was a kid because there was a shop in front of my home and I didn't have to make any extra effort to get the chocolates.

The phrase 'have each of many chocolates' is incorrect; the past tense 'ate' is appropriate. 'Extra efforts' should be 'extra effort' as 'effort' is uncountable here.

× It also effects my health, especially my. Oral dental health. But it is not good for my health.

✓ It also affects my health, especially my oral dental health. But it is not good for my health.

The verb 'effects' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'affects' meaning to influence. Also, the sentence was fragmented; combining for clarity.

× I think becauses offers delicious taste. And it's a softer touch. Chocolates are very popular. In the world, moreover, it is a. Item that is often used for gift. So people like to exchange chocolates as a gift.

✓ I think because it offers a delicious taste and a softer texture. Chocolates are very popular in the world; moreover, they are items that are often used as gifts. So people like to exchange chocolates as gifts.

'Becauses' is incorrect; should be 'because it'. 'Softer touch' is better expressed as 'softer texture'. 'It is a. Item' is fragmented and should be 'they are items'. 'For gift' should be 'as gifts'.

× I love dark chocolates very much because of its. Bitter taste and. Moreover, it contains more caffeine than other chocolates, it has less sugar which is also good for house and boost their energy and made some mind more alert.

✓ I love dark chocolates very much because of their bitter taste. Moreover, they contain more caffeine than other chocolates, have less sugar which is also good for health, boost energy, and make the mind more alert.

'Its' should be 'their' to agree with plural 'dark chocolates'. Sentence fragments corrected. 'House' is incorrect; likely meant 'health'. 'Boost' and 'made' should be parallel verbs 'boost' and 'make'.

× Yes, because chocolates are not only used for eating, there also used for making flavored drinks. So because of its multiple users, people offer like to exchange chocolates as gift.

✓ Yes, because chocolates are not only used for eating, they are also used for making flavored drinks. So because of their multiple uses, people like to exchange chocolates as gifts.

'There also used' should be 'they are also used'. 'Its multiple users' should be 'their multiple uses'. 'Offer like to exchange' is incorrect; corrected to 'people like to exchange'. 'As gift' should be 'as gifts'.