Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to make your answer more natural and clear by correcting grammar and avoiding redundancy. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and provide specific reasons. For example, instead of 'they're reaching give rich in giving protein source', say 'because dark chocolates are rich in antioxidants and provide some protein.'

예시: Yes, I definitely like eating chocolates, especially after my meals as a dessert. Moreover, I prefer dark chocolates because they are rich in antioxidants and provide some protein, which is beneficial for health.

제안: Focus on clarity and correct grammar. Avoid unnecessary words and use linking words to explain your reason. For example, say 'I eat chocolate twice a week because eating too much can cause cavities.'

예시: I usually eat chocolate twice a week because eating too much chocolate can cause cavities, so I try to limit my intake.

제안: Improve sentence structure and grammar for clarity. Use linking words to connect ideas logically. For example, say 'When I was a kid, I did not eat much chocolate because my parents were strict and concerned about my health, so they did not allow me to eat many chocolates.'

예시: When I was a kid, I did not eat much chocolate because my parents were very strict and concerned about my health, so they usually did not allow me to eat many chocolates.

제안: Make your answer more coherent and natural by correcting grammar and using linking words. Also, clarify your points with specific reasons. For example, say 'Chocolate is popular worldwide because it is often given as a gift to loved ones, symbolizing sweet memories and affection.'

예시: Chocolate is popular around the world because many people give it to their loved ones as a symbol of affection and sweet memories.

제안: Combine your sentences for better flow and correct grammar. Use linking words and be specific about the benefits. For example, say 'I like dark chocolates and Milky Bar because their flavours are unique and tasty. Additionally, dark chocolate is rich in antioxidants and protein.'

예시: I like dark chocolates and Milky Bar because their flavours are unique and tasty. Additionally, dark chocolate is rich in antioxidants and provides some protein.

제안: Clarify your answer by correcting grammar and removing unclear phrases. Use linking words to explain your opinion. For example, say 'Yes, giving chocolate as a gift is very popular in my country because it symbolizes love and emotional connection between family and friends.'

예시: Yes, giving chocolate as a gift is very popular in my country because it symbolizes love and emotional connection between family and friends.

× Yes, definitely I like to eat chocolates and I eat after my meals because I considered it as dessert for my for myself.

✓ Yes, definitely I like to eat chocolate and I eat it after my meals because I consider it as a dessert for myself.

The word 'chocolates' is incorrectly used as a plural quantifier here; 'chocolate' as an uncountable noun is more appropriate. Also, 'considered' should be in present tense 'consider' to match the current habit. The phrase 'for my for myself' is redundant; 'for myself' suffices.

× Moreover, I also eat dark chocolates because they're reaching give rich in giving protein source.

✓ Moreover, I also eat dark chocolate because it's rich in protein.

The phrase 'reaching give rich in giving protein source' is grammatically incorrect and unclear. The correct expression is 'rich in protein'. Also, 'dark chocolates' should be 'dark chocolate' as an uncountable noun here.

× Well, are you slee chocolates twice a week? Because of eating so much chocolates can be provide a cavity toward truth.

✓ Well, I eat chocolate twice a week because eating too much chocolate can cause cavities.

The original sentence is confusing and contains errors. 'Are you slee chocolates' is incorrect; it should be 'I eat chocolate'. 'Because of eating so much chocolates can be provide a cavity toward truth' is ungrammatical; the correct form is 'because eating too much chocolate can cause cavities'.

× So that's why I only prefer to eat chocolate twice a week.

✓ So that's why I prefer to eat chocolate only twice a week.

The placement of 'only' is better before 'twice a week' to clarify the frequency. 'Prefer to eat chocolate only twice a week' is more natural.

× Well when I was scared to not eat chocolates to my name because my parents were very strict as they are very concerned about my health so they usually not allowed to me to eat so many chocolates.

✓ Well, when I was a kid, I was not allowed to eat chocolates because my parents were very strict and concerned about my health, so they usually did not allow me to eat many chocolates.

The sentence has multiple errors: 'was scared to not eat chocolates to my name' is incorrect; it should be 'was not allowed to eat chocolates'. 'Usually not allowed to me' should be 'usually did not allow me'. Also, 'so many chocolates' is better as 'many chocolates'. The tense consistency is maintained in past tense.

× Well nowadays chocolate plays crucial role in everyone's life.

✓ Well, nowadays chocolate plays a crucial role in everyone's life.

The sentence is missing the article 'a' before 'crucial role'. Also, a comma after 'Well' improves clarity.

× Some give chocolate to the loved ones because the considered chocolate as a sweet memory for them as as a Swedish.

✓ Some give chocolate to their loved ones because they consider chocolate as a sweet memory for them, as a sweet gesture.

'The considered' should be 'they consider'. 'The loved ones' should be 'their loved ones'. 'As as a Swedish' is unclear and likely a mishearing; 'as a sweet gesture' fits better.

× Well, I like dark chocolates and Milky bar.

✓ Well, I like dark chocolate and Milky Bar.

'Dark chocolates' should be 'dark chocolate' as an uncountable noun. 'Milky bar' should be capitalized as 'Milky Bar' since it is a brand name.

× Because this the flavor of that chocolates are very unique and tasty as well as they are rich of giving extra oxidants, antioxidants and protein.

✓ Because the flavor of those chocolates is very unique and tasty, and they are rich in antioxidants and protein.

'This the flavor of that chocolates' is incorrect; it should be 'the flavor of those chocolates'. 'Are' should be 'is' to agree with 'flavor'. 'Rich of giving extra oxidants' is incorrect; correct phrase is 'rich in antioxidants'. 'Oxidants' is likely a mistake; 'antioxidants' is correct.

× Yes, definitely, nowadays giving gift chocolate is very popular in my nation as well as it is considered as the symbol of love and emotion kear through between early alert phones and dear ones.

✓ Yes, definitely, nowadays giving chocolate as a gift is very popular in my nation, and it is considered a symbol of love and emotion between close friends and dear ones.

'Giving gift chocolate' should be 'giving chocolate as a gift'. 'Emotion kear through between early alert phones and dear ones' is unclear; likely intended 'emotion shared between close friends and dear ones'. The sentence is corrected for clarity and grammar.