Memory— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to make your answer more coherent and avoid repetition. Use clear sentence structures and linking words to connect your ideas logically. Also, keep your answer concise and avoid filler words.

예시: Yes, I used to have a very good memory when I was young, which helped me pass my high school exams. However, nowadays I find myself forgetting things more easily, so I think I need to work on improving my memory.

제안: Focus on structuring your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details. Use linking words like 'for example' or 'because' to make your answer more coherent. Also, pay attention to verb tenses and grammar.

예시: Yes, I once forgot my friend's birthday last year. She invited me to her party, but I accidentally went to work instead. I felt very sad and sorry because I missed an important event for her.

제안: Try to improve sentence clarity and grammar. Use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly. Also, avoid vague phrases like 'hesitate walking environment' and replace them with clearer expressions.

예시: In my daily life, I need to remember things clearly because I work as a nurse in the emergency department. Therefore, acting accurately and recalling important information quickly is crucial in such a fast-paced environment.

제안: Make your answer more concise and avoid repetition. Use linking words to show contrast between old and new methods. Also, complete your sentences fully for clarity.

예시: I used to write important things like dates and passwords in a small notebook that I carried with me. However, with advances in technology, I now use my phone to keep track of these important details more conveniently.

× She invited me to attend her birthday on this specific day but I forgotten about that and I went to work.

✓ She invited me to attend her birthday on this specific day but I forgot about that and I went to work.

The verb 'forgotten' is the past participle form and requires an auxiliary verb like 'have' to be correct. Here, the simple past tense 'forgot' should be used because the action happened in the past without an auxiliary verb.

× I feel very sorry to my friend also.

✓ I feel very sorry for my friend also.

The correct preposition to express sympathy is 'sorry for' not 'sorry to'. Using 'for' indicates the person you feel sorry about.

× I'm working as a nurse in emergency department.

✓ I'm working as a nurse in the emergency department.

When referring to a specific department, the definite article 'the' is required before 'emergency department'.

× So remember things clearly and acting accurately is the most important and crucial role as a nurse in a hesitate walking environment.

✓ So remembering things clearly and acting accurately is the most important and crucial role as a nurse in a hectic working environment.

The verb 'remember' should be in gerund form 'remembering' to parallel 'acting'. Also, 'hesitate walking environment' is incorrect; likely intended 'hectic working environment' to describe a busy workplace.

× then carry it around me for the important things like important dates, birthday dates, or the password, my bank password, everything.

✓ then carry it around with me for important things like important dates, birthday dates, or passwords, my bank password, everything.

The phrase 'carry it around me' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'with' as in 'carry it around with me'. Also, 'the password' should be plural 'passwords' to match the list.

× But in terms of advance in technology, now I use my phone to to.

✓ But in terms of advances in technology, now I use my phone to do so.

The phrase 'advance in technology' should be plural 'advances in technology'. Also, the sentence ends abruptly with 'to to'; it should be completed as 'to do so' to indicate the action of using the phone for notes.