Writing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is somewhat natural but a bit redundant and incomplete at the end. Try to keep your answer concise within 5 sentences and avoid trailing off. Also, use linking words to connect ideas clearly. For example, explain briefly what you link in Notion to make your answer more coherent.

예시: Yes, I write quite a lot. I keep journals and diaries regularly. Additionally, I use Notion, an online personal database, to log my thoughts occasionally. This app helps me organize my ideas and link related notes effectively.

제안: Your answer addresses the question but has some awkward phrasing and redundancy, such as "important to forget" which seems contradictory. Try to use clearer vocabulary and avoid repeating similar ideas. Also, use linking words to connect your reasons smoothly.

예시: I like to write about my thoughts, especially those I might forget in the future. Writing helps me remember my actions and motivations during difficult times. Therefore, it provides me with clarity and perspective.

제안: Your answer is a bit complex and awkwardly phrased, which affects clarity. Try to use simpler sentence structures and clearer tenses. Also, avoid unnecessary words like "historically" and "after my observations" which do not add much meaning here.

예시: Yes, I believe the things I write change over time. As I grow and learn, my thoughts and opinions evolve, so my writing reflects that development.

제안: Your answer is clear and relevant but could be improved by adding linking words and a concluding sentence to make it more complete and natural. Also, avoid starting sentences with "It" without clear reference.

예시: I initially started writing by hand in a diary, but I found it cumbersome. Therefore, I switched to digital note-taking using modern database apps like Notion and Obsidian. I prefer typing now because it is faster and more organized.

× I have a lot of experience writing journals, Diaries and I use Notion which is an online database, personal database sort of thing where I logged on my thoughts occasionally and I used this application to link the.

✓ I have a lot of experience writing journals and diaries, and I use Notion, which is an online personal database where I log my thoughts occasionally and use this application to link them.

The word 'Diaries' should not be capitalized as it is a common noun. The phrase 'logged on my thoughts' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'log my thoughts' to indicate habitual action. Also, 'used' should be 'use' to maintain present tense consistency. The sentence structure was also improved for clarity.

× I like to write about my thoughts particularly which I feel like I might forget in the future, and the ones I feel which are very important to forget.

✓ I like to write about my thoughts, particularly those I feel I might forget in the future, and the ones I feel are very important not to forget.

The phrase 'which I feel like I might forget' is awkward; 'those I feel I might forget' is clearer. Also, 'important to forget' is incorrect; it should be 'important not to forget' to convey the intended meaning.

× It helps me remember what I'm doing and why I'm doing certain things in difficult moments of my life.

✓ It helps me remember what I'm doing and why I'm doing certain things during difficult moments in my life.

The preposition 'in' is acceptable but 'during' is more appropriate when referring to specific periods or moments. This improves clarity and correctness.

× Historically, after my observations, I do believe that the things I write will have been changing and will continue to change because as I evolve, my writing also evolves.

✓ Historically, based on my observations, I believe that the things I write have been changing and will continue to change because as I evolve, my writing also evolves.

The phrase 'will have been changing' is incorrect here; 'have been changing' is the correct present perfect continuous tense to indicate ongoing change up to now. Also, 'do believe' is unnecessarily emphatic; 'believe' suffices.

× I initially started out with handwriting in a diary.

✓ I initially started out handwriting in a diary.

The preposition 'with' is unnecessary here; 'started out handwriting' is the correct phrase to indicate beginning the action.