Hometown— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Cải thiện sự tự nhiên và chính xác ngữ pháp; tránh lặp từ và tiếng “uh/um” thừa; trả lời ngắn gọn với câu chủ đề rõ ràng, rồi thêm 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể. Chú ý thì động từ (I lived → I lived there until I was 18) và dùng cụm từ tự nhiên hơn (in northern Vietnam; a peaceful, quiet town).

예시: I come from a small town in northern Vietnam. It’s a peaceful, quiet place where I grew up until I was 18 before moving away for university.

제안: Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp và dùng từ vựng chính xác; tránh câu lủng củng và lặp dấu hiệu ngập ngừng. Bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng (I like the people), sau đó dùng liên từ để mở rộng và nêu ví dụ cụ thể. Sửa các cụm sai như “willing to have for free” và “join him to help them” thành những diễn đạt tự nhiên.

예시: I especially like the people in my hometown because they are very friendly and helpful. For example, neighbours often check on each other and help visitors or foreigners who have problems.

제안: Nói rõ ràng và chính xác về khoảng thời gian, dùng thì phù hợp và giảm tiếng ngập ngừng. Trả lời trực tiếp (I lived there for 18 years), sau đó bổ sung chi tiết ngắn gọn về giai đoạn học tập. Sửa lỗi cấu trúc như “after my graduate” → “after I graduated”.

예시: I lived there for 18 years. I attended primary and high school in my hometown, and after I graduated from high school I moved to the university dormitory.

제안: Cải thiện rõ ràng ý chính và cấu trúc câu; dùng từ đúng (place, has, people) và tránh lặp từ. Trả lời trực tiếp (No/Yes) rồi giải thích với 1–2 lý do cụ thể, kèm ví dụ so sánh nếu cần. Loại bỏ tiếng ngập ngừng và hoàn thiện câu mô tả công viên, quảng trường.

예시: Not really — I would say it suits older people more because it is very quiet and has many parks and public squares. Young people might prefer a bigger city with more entertainment and job opportunities.

× This is located in the, uh, peaceful and quiet place.

✓ It is located in a peaceful and quiet area.

The original uses 'This is located in the... place' which is unnatural and has article issues. Use 'It is located in a peaceful and quiet area' to correctly use 'there/be' concept with appropriate article and noun choice. Also replace 'place' with 'area' for natural collocation.

× I live there when I was a kid and grow up for, uh, 18 years before leaving this destination to move to the university.

✓ I lived there when I was a kid and grew up for 18 years before leaving to go to university.

Mixing present 'live' with past 'was' is incorrect. Use past tense 'lived' and 'grew' to match the time frame. 'Leaving this destination to move to the university' is awkward; use 'leaving to go to university' for natural phrasing.

× And for me, this is so, uh, amazing.

✓ For me, it was an amazing place.

Context refers to past experience, so use past tense 'was'. Also replace 'this' with 'it' and rephrase to 'an amazing place' for clarity.

× There are a lot of thing I love about my hometown, but I if I have to choose, probably it's about the local people.

✓ There are a lot of things I love about my hometown, but if I had to choose, it would be the local people.

Use plural 'things' not 'thing'. Conditional phrasing needs past conditional 'if I had to choose' and 'it would be' for correct form.

× Umm, the neighborhood in here is very friendly, they are willing to have for free and whenever the foreigner have problems, they join him to uh, help them.

✓ The neighborhood here is very friendly; people are willing to help for free, and whenever foreigners have problems, they help them.

'in here' should be 'here'. 'Willing to have for free' is incorrect—use 'willing to help for free'. 'The foreigner' should be plural 'foreigners', match verb 'have' to 'have problems' -> 'foreigners have problems', and keep pronouns consistent: 'help them'.

× Uh, I have lived there for uh, 18 years, since I, I've studied in the primary school to the UH, to the uh, high school and after, after my graduate, I left my hometown to attend into the dormitory of the university.

✓ I lived there for 18 years; I studied in primary school and high school there, and after I graduated, I left my hometown to live in the university dormitory.

Use simple past 'lived' to describe a finished period. 'I've studied' is awkward here; use 'I studied'. 'After my graduate' is wrong; use 'after I graduated'. 'Attend into the dormitory' should be 'live in the university dormitory'.

× Uh, to be honest, I think this, this play is suitable for the older people instead, because my hometown is very quiet and peaceful.

✓ To be honest, I think this place is more suitable for older people because my hometown is very quiet and peaceful.

'this play' is a typo for 'this place'. 'the older people' should be 'older people' without 'the'. Use 'more suitable' to compare suitability.

× Uh, it also have a lot of, uh, square and park near there.

✓ It also has a lot of squares and parks nearby.

Subject 'it' requires verb 'has' (not 'have'). Use plural 'squares and parks' or 'a lot of squares and parks'. 'Near there' -> 'nearby' is more natural.

× Uh, and many other and many all the pop, all the people usually try in.

✓ Also, many people usually gather there and take part in activities.

Original is unintelligible. Clarify meaning: likely intended that many people gather and participate. Provide a clear, grammatical alternative using present tense 'usually gather'.