Hometown— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Jawaban Anda sudah cukup informatif, tetapi kalimatnya agak panjang dan ada pengulangan informasi (misalnya menyebutkan ibu kota dua kali). Cobalah untuk membuat kalimat lebih singkat dan langsung ke poin utama agar terdengar lebih natural dan efektif.

예시: My hometown is Bandung, the capital of West Java province in Indonesia. It's located about two hours from Jakarta, the country's capital.

제안: Anda sudah memberikan alasan dan deskripsi yang baik, namun ada beberapa kesalahan tata bahasa dan penggunaan kata yang kurang tepat (misalnya 'slower' untuk suhu). Gunakan kata yang tepat dan perbaiki struktur kalimat agar lebih jelas dan natural.

예시: What I like most about Bandung is its cool weather. The temperature usually stays around 21 degrees Celsius, which is cooler than most other cities in Indonesia because it's surrounded by mountains.

제안: Jawaban Anda kurang terstruktur dan ada kalimat yang terputus. Cobalah untuk membuat kalimat yang lengkap dan jelas, serta gunakan linking words untuk menghubungkan ide dengan baik.

예시: I've lived in Bandung since I was a kid, which means about 25 years. I also plan to stay here for my retirement.

제안: Jawaban Anda agak membingungkan dan ada kesalahan tata bahasa serta penggunaan kata (misalnya 'give any stuff'). Cobalah untuk menyusun kalimat yang lebih jelas dan gunakan kosakata yang tepat untuk menjelaskan alasan Anda.

예시: Yes, I think Bandung is a good place for young people. The locals are friendly, so it's easy to talk to them and get information without any difficulty.

× My hometown is Bandung City, It's located in Indonesia, it's the capital city of West Java province and it's near Jakarta which is capital city of Indonesia.

✓ My hometown is Bandung City. It's located in Indonesia, it's the capital city of West Java province and it's near Jakarta, which is the capital city of Indonesia.

The sentence is missing the definite article 'the' before 'capital city of Indonesia'. In English, when referring to a specific known entity like 'capital city', the definite article 'the' is required. Also, the sentence is a run-on and should be split for clarity.

× The thing that I really like about Bandung is the weather, especially for the temperature.

✓ The thing that I really like about Bandung is the weather, especially the temperature.

The preposition 'for' is incorrectly used here. The correct phrase is 'especially the temperature' without 'for'. 'Especially' directly modifies the noun without a preposition.

× It's only standing around 21 Celsius degrees, which is slower than any other cities in Indonesia.

✓ It's only around 21 degrees Celsius, which is lower than any other cities in Indonesia.

The phrase 'standing around' is awkward and incorrect here; 'only around' is better. Also, 'Celsius degrees' should be 'degrees Celsius'. The adjective 'slower' is incorrect for temperature; the correct comparative adjective is 'lower'.

× Remember that the area is surrounded by mountains, so no wonder the temperature is quite low here.

✓ Remember that the area is surrounded by mountains, so no wonder the temperature is quite low here.

This sentence is correct and does not contain grammar mistakes related to the provided list.

× I've lived here since I was a kid, so it means that. 25 years and I have planned to live in the city for my retirement life.

✓ I've lived here since I was a kid, so that means 25 years, and I have planned to live in the city for my retirement life.

The sentence is fragmented and incorrectly punctuated. 'So it means that. 25 years' should be combined into a single coherent sentence. Also, 'retirement life' is better expressed as 'retirement'.

× I believe so. Moreover, people here are friendly, so if you want to get some information from them, it's easy for you to interact with them and you don't have to give. Any stuff to them in order to get some answer or information?

✓ I believe so. Moreover, people here are friendly, so if you want to get some information from them, it's easy for you to interact with them and you don't have to give them anything in order to get some answers or information.

The sentence has incorrect punctuation and word choice. 'Give. Any stuff to them' is incorrect; it should be 'give them anything'. Also, 'some answer' should be plural 'some answers'. The question mark is inappropriate here as the sentence is a statement.