Work— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is generally clear but can be more natural and concise. Avoid redundancy and improve sentence flow by linking ideas smoothly. For example, mention your job and company in one sentence, then add details in the next.

예시: I work as a software engineer at Bliss, a company located in the center of Aquandal. I have been there for about three years, and I really enjoy my role.

제안: Your answer has some grammatical errors and redundancy. Try to make your sentences clearer and more connected using linking words. Also, avoid incomplete sentences and be specific about your work environment.

예시: I work at Bliss, a software company located in the city center. It takes me about 30 minutes to commute there. The workplace is good because it helps me stay productive throughout the day.

제안: Your answer has some grammatical mistakes and awkward phrasing. Use clear linking words like 'because' and 'therefore' properly. Also, try to be more specific about why the workplace is good.

예시: Yes, it is a good place to work because the environment is supportive and friendly. My team, boss, and supervisor are very approachable, which motivates me to do my best every day.

제안: Your answer is understandable but can be improved by avoiding repetition and making sentences more natural. Use linking words to connect ideas and describe the environment more vividly.

예시: Yes, I like my workplace because it is calm and peaceful. Although my team and I mostly work inside the building, it is close to a garden where I can enjoy the fresh scent of flowers.

제안: Your answer is a bit unclear and incomplete. Try to organize your ideas clearly with proper linking words and complete your sentences. Be specific about your future plans and reasons.

예시: I don't plan to leave my current job soon, but if I get the opportunity, I would like to work for governmental agencies. I want to develop software products that benefit both the country and people worldwide.

× I am employed at a company called Bliss which is situated at the center Aquandal.

✓ I am employed at a company called Bliss which is situated at the center of Aquandal.

The sentence is missing the preposition 'of' after 'center'. The correct phrase is 'at the center of Aquandal'. This is a common prepositional phrase indicating location.

× It is about 30 minutes from my home to commute to the work.

✓ It takes about 30 minutes to commute from my home to work.

The original sentence misuses prepositions and word order. The correct structure is 'It takes about 30 minutes to commute from my home to work.' This clearly expresses the duration and direction of the commute.

× It is usually a good workplace because I can be very much productive as well as very much fruitful throughout the day.

✓ It is usually a good workplace because I can be very productive and fruitful throughout the day.

The phrase 'very much productive' and 'very much fruitful' are incorrect. The correct form is 'very productive' and 'fruitful'. 'Very much' is not used before adjectives like 'productive' or 'fruitful'.

× I work at a company called is Bliss.

✓ I work at a company called Bliss.

The phrase 'called is Bliss' is incorrect. The verb 'is' is unnecessary here. The correct sentence is 'I work at a company called Bliss.'

× It is situated at the center of It is about 30 minutes from my home to commute to the work.

✓ It is situated at the center. It is about 30 minutes from my home to commute to work.

The original sentence is a run-on and confusing. Splitting into two sentences improves clarity: 'It is situated at the center.' and 'It is about 30 minutes from my home to commute to work.' Also, 'to the work' should be 'to work'.

× Is the workplace is supportive and friendly, therefore I love working there and my team as well as the boss and supervisor are very approachable.

✓ The workplace is supportive and friendly; therefore, I love working there, and my team as well as the boss and supervisor are very approachable.

The sentence incorrectly starts with 'Is the workplace is'. It should be 'The workplace is'. Also, punctuation is needed to separate clauses for clarity.

× Thus I get motivated every time to do good thing and to get continued with my work similarly.

✓ Thus, I get motivated every time to do good things and to continue with my work similarly.

The phrase 'to get continued with my work' is incorrect. The correct form is 'to continue with my work'. Also, 'good thing' should be plural 'good things' to match the context.

× Mostly my team and I work on the building, but it is very near to the garden, which I can smell the smell of the flowers and it is very good place to work.

✓ Mostly, my team and I work in the building, but it is very near the garden, where I can smell the flowers, and it is a very good place to work.

The preposition 'on' should be 'in' when referring to working inside a building. 'Near to' is better as 'near'. 'Which I can smell the smell of the flowers' is awkward; 'where I can smell the flowers' is better. Also, 'very good place' needs the article 'a'.

× Although I have not immediately planned to leave the job and work on anything other but if I get a chance then I would obviously like to work for governmental agencies and create the product for them.

✓ Although I have not immediately planned to leave the job and work on anything else, if I get a chance, I would obviously like to work for governmental agencies and create products for them.

The phrase 'work on anything other' is incorrect; it should be 'anything else'. Also, commas are needed for clarity. 'Create the product' should be plural 'create products' to match general meaning.

× Mostly I would be creating the software product that will be beneficial for the people of the world as well as the people of a country which can.

✓ Mostly, I would be creating software products that will be beneficial for the people of the world as well as the people of a country.

'The software product' should be plural 'software products' to indicate general products. The sentence ends abruptly with 'which can', which is incomplete and should be removed for clarity.