Work— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is somewhat repetitive and contains minor grammatical errors. Try to avoid repeating phrases and ensure correct sentence structure. Also, provide a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details to make your answer more natural and effective.

예시: I am currently working full-time as a personal support worker in Mississauga. This role allows me to assist people who need care and support.

제안: There are some unclear parts and grammatical mistakes in your answer, such as 'I'm crying' which seems incorrect. Also, avoid redundancy and try to use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

예시: I work full-time in Mississauga as a personal support worker. I really enjoy this job because it allows me to help people in need and make a positive difference in their lives.

제안: Your answer has some pronunciation or word choice errors like 'property' instead of 'proper' and 'craters cure environment' which is unclear. Try to use correct vocabulary and linking words to make your answer coherent and clear.

예시: Yes, it is a very good place to work because the company prioritizes our safety by providing proper training and protective equipment. This creates a secure environment for me and my coworkers, making the workplace comfortable and stress-free.

제안: Your answer has some unclear phrases like 'work clip workplace' and awkward sentence structure. Try to use clear and correct expressions, and link your ideas logically.

예시: Yes, I like my workplace because most of my coworkers are very helpful. Even my manager sometimes assists us whenever we need help.

제안: Your answer is unclear and incomplete with repeated words and unfinished sentences. Try to organize your thoughts clearly, avoid repetition, and provide a complete response with linking words.

예시: Definitely, I plan to become a registered nurse in Canada because it has been my dream job since I was a child. I have always wanted to do a humble and meaningful job helping others.

× Yes, I'm working. Yes, I'm working as a personal support worker in Mississauga and right now I'm at full time position.

✓ Yes, I work as a personal support worker in Mississauga and right now I have a full-time position.

The present continuous 'I'm working' is not appropriate here because the question asks about current employment status in general, so the simple present 'I work' is better. Also, 'at full time position' is incorrect; it should be 'have a full-time position' to indicate employment status. 'Full-time' should be hyphenated as it is a compound adjective.

× I work in Mississauga an right now I'm crying.

✓ I work in Mississauga and right now I'm working full-time.

The word 'an' is a typo and should be 'and'. The phrase 'I'm crying' is incorrect in this context; likely the intended meaning is 'I'm working full-time'. The verb 'crying' is unrelated to the context of work.

× I'm holding a full time position and I really enjoyed this shop because it allowed me to help people in need and to make a positive difference in their lives.

✓ I have a full-time position and I really enjoy this job because it allows me to help people in need and make a positive difference in their lives.

The phrase 'I'm holding a full time position' is awkward; 'I have a full-time position' is more natural. 'I really enjoyed this shop' is incorrect; 'shop' should be 'job'. Also, the tense should be present to match ongoing feelings: 'I really enjoy' and 'it allows'. 'Full-time' should be hyphenated.

× Yes, it's very good place to work because the company prioritize our safety by providing property, proper training and protective equipment.

✓ Yes, it's a very good place to work because the company prioritizes our safety by providing proper training and protective equipment.

The sentence is missing the article 'a' before 'very good place'. 'Prioritize' should be 'prioritizes' to agree with singular subject 'company'. 'Property' is incorrect here; likely intended word is 'proper'. 'Proper training' is correct.

× This craters cure environment not only for me but also for all for all my coworkers which makes the workplace comfortable and stress free.

✓ This creates a secure environment not only for me but also for all my coworkers, which makes the workplace comfortable and stress-free.

'Craters cure' is a misspelling; the correct phrase is 'creates a secure'. 'Stress free' should be hyphenated as 'stress-free'. The phrase 'for all for all my coworkers' repeats 'for all' unnecessarily.

× Yes, I like my work clip workplace because most of the coworkers are very helpful.

✓ Yes, I like my workplace because most of the coworkers are very helpful.

The phrase 'work clip workplace' is incorrect and unclear; it should be simply 'workplace'.

× Even my manager sometime help us to do that. Ask whenever we need help.

✓ Even my manager sometimes helps us and asks whenever we need help.

'Sometime' should be 'sometimes' to indicate frequency. 'Help' should be 'helps' to agree with singular subject 'manager'. The sentence 'Ask whenever we need help.' is incomplete and unclear; it should be combined and clarified as 'and asks whenever we need help.'

× Definitely I will become a nurse and a registered nurse in Canada because it's my dream job when when I was a kid on that time, I was always planning to do a. To do a humble job. So that's why I'm I always dream was.

✓ Definitely, I will become a registered nurse in Canada because it's my dream job. When I was a kid, I always planned to do a humble job. That's why I have always dreamed of this.

The sentence has multiple issues: 'when when' is repeated; 'planning to do a. To do a humble job.' is fragmented and unclear. 'I'm I always dream was' is incorrect. The corrected version uses proper future tense 'I will become', past tense 'I always planned', and present perfect 'I have always dreamed'. The phrase 'registered nurse' is used correctly as a single profession.