Shopping— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more natural and concise. Start with a direct topic sentence, avoid unnecessary self-labels like “shopaholic,” and give one or two brief specific details about what you buy and why. Keep it to under five sentences and use linking words if adding details.

例: Yes, I enjoy shopping. I usually shop online and typically buy two items at a time, such as clothes or small household gadgets, because I prefer quick deliveries and easy returns.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence, correct repetition and grammar, and add a specific example to support your reason. Use a linking phrase like “because” to connect ideas and avoid repeating words.

例: Yes, I always compare prices. I check both local shops and online stores because I want the best value; for example, I recently compared two websites and saved 20% by buying from the cheaper retailer.

提案: Organize your answer with a clear present-tense topic sentence, correct tense and grammar, and give one specific reason or example for your difficulty. Use linking words like “because” or “so” to make the answer coherent and avoid repetition and filler words.

例: Yes, I often find it difficult to decide what to buy because I worry about choosing the best style or price. For instance, when I shop for shoes I usually spend a long time comparing options before I finally pick one.

提案: Give a balanced opinion and specific reasoning. Start with a clear topic sentence that acknowledges both sides, then support it with a specific example or condition. Avoid repetition and grammatical errors, and use linking words like “however” or “often” to show nuance.

例: Not always. Expensive clothes are often better made and more durable; however, there are affordable brands that offer good quality. For example, I once bought a mid-priced jacket that lasted longer than a cheaper one I had bought earlier.

× Yes, I like shopping as I am a very shopaholic person and I'll mostly buy 2 items from the online sites.

✓ Yes, I like shopping because I am a shopaholic and I usually buy two items from online sites.

'Very shopaholic' is incorrect because shopaholic is a noun; use 'a shopaholic' as a noun phrase. 'Mostly' is awkward with future 'I'll' here; 'usually' fits habitual action. Use the word 'because' to show reason. Spell out numbers under ten as words: 'two'. Remove the unnecessary definite article 'the' before 'online sites'.

× Yes, definitely. I compare price on the local market and in the online online websites as where I can get cheaper things.

✓ Yes, definitely. I compare prices at the local market and on online websites to see where I can get cheaper items.

Use plural 'prices' to match 'compare'. Prepositions: use 'at' for markets and 'on' for websites. Remove duplicated 'online'. Replace 'as where' with 'to see where' for correct clause connection. 'Things' is vague; 'items' is more natural.

× So then I will buy from that place.

✓ Then I will buy from that place.

The leading 'So then' is redundant; 'Then' alone is sufficient. Keep sentence concise and natural.

× Definitely I got confused every time when I was shopping.

✓ I definitely get confused every time I go shopping.

The mixed past tense 'got' and 'was shopping' conflicts with the habitual meaning 'every time'; use present simple 'get' and 'go shopping' for repeated actions.

× So it was a very, very misunderstanding thing for me as mostly I I want to very difficult to choose from to one thing.

✓ It was very confusing for me because I often find it difficult to choose just one thing.

'Misunderstanding thing' is incorrect; use 'confusing'. Remove duplicate 'I'. 'I want to very difficult' is ungrammatical; use 'I often find it difficult'. 'Choose from to one thing' should be 'choose just one thing'. The correction clarifies meaning and fixes word order.

× Yes, I think expensive clothes are much better quality comparing to compared to the cheaper one as on the other hand cheaper cheaper things are not much good quality offered as and it not good.

✓ Yes, I think expensive clothes are generally better quality compared to cheaper ones; cheaper items often are not as good in quality.

'Much better quality' should be followed by 'compared to' and match plural nouns: 'cheaper ones'. Remove duplicate 'compared to' and 'cheaper'. 'Not much good quality offered as and it not good' is ungrammatical; use 'often are not as good in quality'. This fixes adjective/adverb misuse, repetition, and agreement.