History— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cevabınızda daha doğal ve akıcı ifadeler kullanmalısınız. Ayrıca, cümle yapısını basit ve anlaşılır tutarak, konuyu daha net ifade etmelisiniz. Örneğin, tarih konularını belirtirken daha açık ve düzenli bir şekilde anlatmalısınız.

例: Yes, I have studied history, particularly about the Ottoman Empire. I learned about important figures like Sultan Mehmet the Conqueror and Suleiman the Magnificent, as well as historical events related to Hannibal in Tunisia.

提案: Cümlenizde tekrarlar ve anlamsal belirsizlikler var. Daha net ve akıcı cümleler kurmalısınız. Ayrıca, bağlaçlar kullanarak cümlelerinizi birbirine bağlamalısınız.

例: I usually learn history at school, but sometimes I use the computer to find more information. Additionally, I enjoy reading history books to deepen my knowledge.

提案: Cümleniz karışık ve anlaşılması zor. Daha açık ve mantıklı cümleler kurmalısınız. Ayrıca, bağlaçlar kullanarak düşüncelerinizi daha iyi ifade edebilirsiniz.

例: Learning history helps us understand how people in the past dealt with problems like economic crises and wars. It also teaches us about the development of human values and society.

提案: Cümleniz anlam açısından belirsiz ve bazı kelimeler yanlış kullanılmış. Düşüncelerinizi daha açık ve doğru kelimelerle ifade etmelisiniz.

例: I believe learning history is important because it educates and entertains people of all ages. However, it should be taught in an engaging way to keep learners interested.

× I studied Ottoman Empire history and Tunisia history about Hannibal and father Sultan Mehmet the Conqueror and the magnificent Suleiman.

✓ I studied the history of the Ottoman Empire and Tunisia, including Hannibal, Sultan Mehmet the Conqueror, and the magnificent Suleiman.

The original sentence incorrectly uses singular forms where plural or possessive forms are needed, such as 'Ottoman Empire history' instead of 'the history of the Ottoman Empire'. Also, 'father Sultan Mehmet' is unclear and likely incorrect; it should be 'Sultan Mehmet the Conqueror'. Proper nouns and historical references need correct article usage and phrasing for clarity.

× I usually learn and I usually learn history in school, but sometimes I use computer for access to knowledge, my knowledge, and that's all I think.

✓ I usually learn history at school, but sometimes I use the computer to access knowledge, my knowledge, and that's all, I think.

The preposition 'in' is incorrect when referring to learning at a place; 'at school' is correct. Also, 'use computer for access to knowledge' should be 'use the computer to access knowledge' to correctly express purpose and article usage.

× You can know what they did on past how did they handle the economic sickness or how did they fought and passed or how did they found the humanity like that, I think.

✓ You can know what they did in the past, how they handled economic crises, how they fought and passed, or how they found humanity, something like that, I think.

The sentence has multiple past tense errors: 'on past' should be 'in the past'; 'how did they handle' should be 'how they handled' to maintain statement form; 'how did they fought' should be 'how they fought'; 'how did they found' should be 'how they found'. The auxiliary 'did' is incorrectly used with past tense verbs here.

× I think it is because it's already anonymous and amuses and it's very good for children and adults.

✓ I think it is important because it's already famous and amusing, and it's very good for children and adults.

The words 'anonymous' and 'amuses' are incorrect in this context. 'Anonymous' means unknown, which contradicts the intended meaning; 'famous' fits better. 'Amuses' is a verb, but an adjective 'amusing' is needed here to describe the subject.