Stories— Part 1 採点レポート
会話
Part 1
試験官
Do you love stories in your childhood?
受験者
Yes. When I was a child, I loved to listen to stories, especially about athletes. When I was a child, I played baseball and I read a lot of biographies of players.
試験官
Do you prefer listening to stories or reading them?
受験者
When I was a child, I preferred listening to stories about right now, I always usually read stories because I am a journalist and I have to gain a lot of knowledge and vocabularies in Japanese and English.
試験官
Did you ever write a story when you were a child?
受験者
Yes. When I was in junior high school, I wrote stories about fiction which illustrated baseball players, and we played it in the theater.
試験官
What kind of stories do you like?
受験者
I like to listen to and read the brave stories such as athletes, success stories or craftsman's efforts to be a well known people, which makes me encouraged.
評価
総合
Part 1
Do you love stories in your childhood?
スコア: 75.0提案: 回答は内容が重複しており、同じフレーズが繰り返されています。より自然で効果的な回答にするために、重複を避け、具体的な詳細を加えてください。
例: Yes, I loved listening to stories about athletes during my childhood because I played baseball myself and enjoyed reading biographies of famous players.
Do you prefer listening to stories or reading them?
スコア: 65.0提案: 回答が文法的に不自然で、意味が伝わりにくい部分があります。現在と過去の比較を明確にし、文を簡潔にまとめてください。
例: When I was a child, I preferred listening to stories, but now I usually read them because, as a journalist, I need to improve my knowledge and vocabulary in both Japanese and English.
Did you ever write a story when you were a child?
スコア: 70.0提案: 回答は基本的な内容を伝えていますが、文の構造が少し不自然です。より明確で流暢な表現を心がけ、詳細を具体的に述べてください。
例: Yes, when I was in junior high school, I wrote fictional stories about baseball players, and our class performed them in the school theater.
What kind of stories do you like?
スコア: 68.0提案: 語彙の選択が不自然で、文法的な誤りもあります。より適切な単語を使い、文を簡潔にして、理由を明確に述べてください。
例: I enjoy reading and listening to inspiring stories about athletes, successful people, or craftsmen because they motivate me to work hard.
文法
× I have to gain a lot of knowledge and vocabularies in Japanese and English.
✓ I have to gain a lot of knowledge and vocabulary in Japanese and English.
The word 'vocabulary' is an uncountable noun and should not be pluralized as 'vocabularies'. Use 'vocabulary' to refer to the collection of words in a language.
× I wrote stories about fiction which illustrated baseball players, and we played it in the theater.
✓ I wrote fictional stories about baseball players, and we performed them in the theater.
The phrase 'stories about fiction' is incorrect; 'fictional stories' is the correct form. Also, 'played it in the theater' is incorrect when referring to performing a story; 'performed them in the theater' is appropriate.
× I like to listen to and read the brave stories such as athletes, success stories or craftsman's efforts to be a well known people, which makes me encouraged.
✓ I like to listen to and read brave stories such as those about athletes, success stories, or craftsmen's efforts to become well-known people, which encourage me.
The use of 'the brave stories' is incorrect; 'brave stories' without 'the' is better. 'Craftsman's' should be plural possessive 'craftsmen's' to match 'efforts'. 'Well known' should be hyphenated as 'well-known'. 'Makes me encouraged' is incorrect; 'encourage me' is the proper expression.
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